“Puppies aren't just for Christmas and dads aren’t just for paternity leave.” Meet the single parent calling on dads to step up

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Michael Ray became a first time father at 49, a single father nine months later, and a sole parent by the time his daughter Charlie turned two.?

But the former bodyguard says the only thing more frightening than protecting Bon Jovi from screaming fans is looking after an 18 month old on your own. “Being fearless and masculine and all of those things that I thought was bravery went out the window,” Ray says.

Faced with attending the maternal and child health centre and being banned from going backstage at his daughter’s ballet concert, these moments opened Ray’s eyes to the inequities of sharing the family load and its flow through impact for women in the workplace.

“If dads aren't enabled, encouraged and expected to be equally responsible for raising the next generation, guess who the load falls on?” he says. “We've constantly supported mums. We've gone out of our way: flexible work, affordable childcare. All of these are framed as a women's issue. They're actually a symptom of the problem that men aren't expected to be equally responsible.”

• WATCH INCLUSION MATTERS: WORKING PARENTS

The number of fathers taking parental leave in Australia is low by global standards. Official data reveals just one in 20 fathers take primary parental leave . Why is that?

The answer is multi-faceted, says Ray. The gender pay gap not only holds back women, but places additional pressure on men — traditionally the higher earner — to remain in the workplace in order to provide resources for their family. But there’s also another reason.

“Psychological safety and support within organisations isn’t there,” says Ray, pointing to research highlighting the number of men who admit to regularly lying in order to facilitate caring duties.

“Puppies aren't just for Christmas and dads aren't just for paternity leave. They both have ongoing, changing needs. It's no good patting yourself on the back as an organisation going, ‘How good are we? We just gave Joe six weeks to be with his wife’. And then the minute Joe says, ‘I've got a doctor's appointment, a school run, a sports day’, all of the other plethora of responsibilities that pop up, then rolling your eyes and go ‘You’re kidding’.”

“Until we actually acknowledge, then understand, then finally address these barriers, nothing’s going to change,” the LinkedIn Top Voice says.

How can dads be encouraged to take up parental leave? What role do workplaces play in supporting all caregivers? Share your thoughts in the comments below.

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Something for you

You might think that being made redundant three times within three years would get you down, but LinkedIn member Nic Scheltema has chosen to see the silver lining of his bumpy career trajectory.

In a revealing post , he likens his recent experiences with redundancy as a learning curve, part of an intricate ecosystem of his working life where setbacks will only serve to strengthen his resilience for future roles. "Every time I’m met with any career adversity, I become a better employee, a better manager, a better colleague, and a better friend," he writes.

Reporting by: Cathy Anderson , Melissa Cantor , Marty McCarthy , Brendan Wong