Public Speaking 101 - Boldness

If I went back to college again, I would concentrate on two areas: learning to write and speak before an audience. Nothing in life is more important than the ability to communicate effectively. - Gerald R. Ford

Think.  About. It.

Welcome to my brief series on Public Speaking! Again, I have divided the scope into three parts. I have split Public Speaking into boldness, attention and meaning. I am convinced that this is all it entails. I hope the following content is helpful.

All the time, I meet people who are terrified of public speaking.

Public speaking is said to be the biggest fear reported by many American adults, topping flying, financial ruin, sickness and even death. Some people would prefer to be in their own coffins than give an eulogy at a funeral.

This article is imperative and will focus on the fundamental ingredient of public speaking – boldness. So, how do you become bold(er)?

First, realize that boldness is developed in the mind. In this context, the opposite of boldness is stage fright. Your stage fright has nothing to do with the audience and everything to do with your thoughts. Simply, you are scaring yourself. Stop scaring yourself. Stop thinking that you are going to mess it up. No, you are not going to fall flat or make a grammar error. Stop assuming that people are judging you. Here’s a trick – whenever you catch people staring at you, assume that they agree with you or that they are attracted. It is much better to assume good/flattering thoughts. Simply refuse to think thoughts that create self-doubt and low confidence. To defeat stage fight, you must address negative perceptions, beliefs, thoughts, images, and predictions.

You are not perfect, no one is. The knowledge of this is important because secretly, shy people are afraid of showing vulnerability or being considered less than perfect. After you convince yourself that you will not mess it up, you must then convince yourself that if you mess it up, you will be just fine! Everyone has messed it up before! And you have another day to fix it! It is okay to make mistakes. Also, it is not always your fault. So, stop beating yourself over some mistake you made last time. No one remembers – tell yourself that! Summarily, learning to accept yourself and not feeling that you have to prove yourself to others is the root.

Be honest. Boldness is harder when you are dishonest, don’t you think? So, be willing to tell the truth about yourself, your background and your knowledge. Speak in the language and diction that makes you comfortable. Everyone has a story – with bright and dark sides. Everyone is just like you, with simple pleasures and great scandals. You can be honest. Be honest about what you know and what you do not know. Do not be afraid of a simple “I don’t know”. If you show enough enthusiasm after, people will easily forgive your ignorance. A great way to start any talk is by being honest. You may tell your audience exactly who you are, exactly how you feel about speaking to them and what your fears are. They will accept and love you.

Soon enough, shift the focus from yourself and your fear to your purpose. Keep your mind away from your dressing, accent or posture. It helps to focus on your mission – the exact message you are trying to communicate. You can distract yourself from your words by paying too much attention to external factors. Instead, visualize your success. Instead of wondering why the lady in front is smiling, think about the next line of your speech and the next until the very end.

Importantly, focus on your strengths. Speak at the speed that calms you. Do not feel pressured to speak fast. It does not prove anything. In fact, listeners generally prefer speakers who speak slowly. Do not feel pressured to speak without a note. If you need your notes and you are allowed to use them, please do. Dwell on the areas of your content that you know best. Perhaps you are certain of some details and unsure about others. Also, until you attain mastery, dwell on the speaking style that makes you most comfortable. Perhaps you prefer to give a headline before delving into the talk or perhaps you prefer to reach the point in bits. You may prefer to analyze or describe. To be bold, you have to be comfortable.

Try standing or sitting in a self-assured, confident posture. Sitting straight does wonders. So does standing in a spot. Try not to fidget or roam around. You may practice tricks to calm yourself. Of course, there are tricks. You might figure out things that help you focus or aid your confidence. In our debate committee in University, females always wore heels to debate competitions. Some people play with toys while they speak, some people chew gum, some people keep their throats wet/dry. If it works for you, do it. But tricks are unreliable and amateurish. So, work on your speaking skills, so that you can talk anytime, anywhere.

Well, here is the best trick of them all. Prepare your material in advance and read it aloud to hear your voice. We sometimes assume that the best speakers speak extempore and need no preparation. This is untrue, everyone rehearses. Only that the better you get at speaking, the less your rehearsal time will be. Preparation may include preparing your entire speech days before the event or steadily arranging your thoughts before taking the microphone. Whichever, everyone is bolder and more fluent with rehearsed content.

The burning question here then becomes what if I am asked to speak impromptu. Well, the next level of boldness requires you to learn to improvise. Begin with always preparing. If you pay enough attention to your environment, you will always have something to say. However, if it happens that you forget what you planned to say or you are entirely lost, try any of the following.You may cheerfully decline. That is, you may decide to not speak about a topic in a respectful and lively manner. Or you may speak about the topics you know about and abandon those of which you have no knowledge. Remember that honesty is key. “I do not know about this” or “I would need some clarification or context” would do some help. Beyond this, always remember that no one knows what you planned to say. No matter how rigid your plan is, you can change it while you speak. If you forget a detail, move on. No one will notice.

You may take this a little further when you make connections with your audience. If eye contact scares you, you may leave this alone. However, exchanging glances with everyone in the room is incredibly empowering. You may safely choose a few friendly faces to stare at. Look for people who are attentive and receptive. Then try sharing your eye contact. You may stare at one person for ten seconds before switching to the other. Eye contact with the right people is good, instantaneous feedback that will keep you going.

Ultimately, remember to keep talking. Can you think of one great person who was not a great public speaker? No, you cannot. To attain greatness, you have to influence many. To influence many, you have to communicate. Public speaking is not a special talent reserved for a few but a skill that everyone must learn. To develop this skill, you must practice. So, speak once you get the chance. Volunteer to speak everywhere. Fall in love with the sound of your voice and the improvements you are making. Look forward to speaking and you will become unafraid.

When you speak, see yourself in a position of power. You are in a position of power because everyone is listening and looking to hear from you. Bask in it. You have information that they need. In that moment you are god. If you are this, why shall you shy?

I hope this was helpful.

Next , I will talk about how you can sustain the attention of your audience.

Have a great week!