How Saying No Can Be Your Superpower

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I used to be the biggest people-pleaser known to man. As the owner of two organizations in my mid-twenties, it was standard practice for me to over-commit and under-deliver, both in my personal and professional life. The main reason I almost always said yes to my team members, strategic partners, clients, and prospects was that I didn’t want to disappoint them.?

While in the moment of saying yes I looked like a hero, in time, I became a villain. I would try everything to fulfill the promises I made but at the expense of my emotional and physical wellbeing. Needless to say, when I couldn’t fulfill a promise, it left me in an awkward predicament with the person I’d said yes to.?

Sounds complicated, doesn’t it?

It wore me out and even began to erode trust in my relationships.?

Eventually, I started peeling back the layers of this thing called simplicity. If I wanted a simpler life and a strong leadership influence, I needed to learn how to say no. The more I did, the more I lifted our company up one person at a time.

As leaders grow and mature, people only want more of their time, not less. Thus, skillfully managing your life is everything.

Typically when people come knocking, it’s for 1 of 3 things:??

1. a favor
2. an obligation
3. an opportunity?

To sift through these requests and give an equivocal yes or no, we need to take a step back.

One practical thing that has empowered me to decline requests more easily is knowing my priorities. Every time I say no to something I shouldn’t engage in, I get to say yes to more of my priorities. When I decline someone’s request, I can simply share my priorities so they understand. Perhaps this informally encourages others to set and maintain their boundaries too.?

When we let our priorities determine our decisions, we naturally erect boundaries around the people and things that matter most. Once this practice was established, I found myself saying no far more often than yes. As a result, I live a simpler life.?

What are your top 5 priorities in your life right now?

(This is taken from my latest book,?'Move the Needle: How Inside Out Leaders Influence Organizational Culture '

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About Robb Holman

Robb Holman is a Global?Keynote Speaker ?and?3x Author ?of leadership books,?Lead the Way, All In, and Move the Needle. In 2022, Global Gurus named him one of the Top 30 World’s Leadership Thought Leaders and his Inside Out Leadership philosophy has been featured in publications like Inc, Forbes, and Fast Company. You can visit Robb by going?here .

Robb is presently offering a?FREE assessment ?to help create a level of self-awareness on four key areas of your life: Perspective, Purpose, Vision, and Leading Yourself First.