The Psychology of Friendship: Interpersonal Attachment and the Power of Knowing Each Other.

Interpersonal attachment plays a crucial role in the formation and maintenance of friendships, providing emotional security, social support, and psychological well-being (Ainsworth, 1989). While love is often associated with romantic relationships, friendships also embody deep emotional bonds that align with attachment theory. Understanding each other within friendships strengthens these bonds, fostering trust and emotional safety (Hazan & Shaver, 1987).

Attachment theory, originally developed by Bowlby (1969), posits that human beings have an innate need for close relationships that provide security and support. While much of the research focuses on parent-child and romantic attachments, friendships also serve as significant attachment relationships (Fraley & Davis, 1997). Individuals develop attachment styles—secure, anxious, or avoidant—that influence how they interact within friendships (Mikulincer & Shaver, 2007). Secure attachments in friendships are associated with higher trust, deeper understanding, and greater resilience in conflicts (Gillath et al., 2008).

Love, in psychological terms, extends beyond romance and encompasses the deep emotional connections in friendships (Sternberg, 1986). Sternberg’s Triangular Theory of Love suggests that love consists of three components: intimacy, passion, and commitment. In friendships, intimacy—the feeling of closeness and mutual understanding—is the most critical aspect (Reis & Shaver, 1988). Knowing each other on a deeper level contributes to relational satisfaction and emotional security, reinforcing the friendship’s longevity (Baumeister & Leary, 1995).

Research highlights that strong friendships reduce stress, increase happiness, and contribute to psychological resilience (Holt-Lunstad et al., 2010). The act of self-disclosure—sharing personal thoughts and feelings—enhances mutual understanding and strengthens emotional bonds (Laurenceau et al., 1998). Furthermore, reciprocal emotional support fosters a sense of belonging, which is vital for psychological well-being (Cohen & Wills, 1985).