PSA (Pandemic Service Announcement)

I felt like I had to put this out there (just in case, someone decides to mistake professionalism for privilege)

Last night, I received a call at 10.30 PM. It wasn’t a number I recognised, so I declined. It rang persistently. I answered, to find a journalist from a large regional media group, having a one-sided conversation with questions about our “matrimonial service” (two words good enough to push my buttons). After she finished, my response was, “Have you looked at the time?”. As much as I’d like to believe that a dating-related article could be breaking news, we can all live with a missed opportunity. Subsequently, almost on cue, I received incessant WhatsApps at 11.30 PM from a former member, who in the same timezone, expressed his interest ‘to get back into the dating game’. Again, unless this is a breakthrough about a CoVid-19 vaccine, it is information that could've waited until a decent hour.

During the pandemic, especially, there seems to be increasing amount of blatant disregard for boundaries, into someone's personal space, like that one 'hanging' passenger jostling for space in a Virar local. Just because we’re working from home. Another professional acquaintance recently told me a colleague just video-called her in the middle of the day, without any notice or valid reason. She could’ve been feeding her toddler, having lunch, or simply in the middle of another meeting, who knows.

Service industry professionals are already being adjusting, flexible and compromising (you know where this is going), but cannot not be at your beck and call, at the cost of mental health. For one – I’ll speak for my line of work alone – matchmaking is not an essential service. Just as dating burnout is real, there are chances this intrusive behaviour affects the emotional well-being of your therapist / dating coach etc.

So please, think twice:

• Before you randomly call someone at 10.00 am on a weekday, unless they’re expecting a conversation – they could’ve had a packed day with meetings planned ahead – sending an e-mail will mostly elicit a response. Even with people that I have an amazing professional rapport, I would never call them without intimating them beforehand.
• Before sending an e-mail to someone in your contact list (where you’ve professionally engaged in the past, so this wasn’t going to junk), and then instant messaging the individual, 10 minutes later, notifying them of the same. So. Not. Needed.
• Before calling someone on their day off, which is sacrosanct to them (unless it’s an emergency, again, which it never is). Much like you, people need to sleep, rest, spend time with their loved ones and choose to do whatever the want they want to, in their personal time. It doesn't mean they don't take you / their work seriously. 
• Check business hours that are listed on websites and emails. Newsflash: It’s not there for aesthetic purposes. Every industry / profession demands different work hours and expectations, so be cognisant and respectful.
• Before straining a healthy environment with another professional, underpinned by mutual respect.

And lastly, please remember that you work with someone, not for them. All we can do in this time is practice basic empathy and kindness, that will goes a long way, and hopefully outlast the extraordinary times we're living in.