Protecting Your Children by Making Healthy Choices During Divorce

Lori Bonnevier, MSW, LSCW, a court-appointed evaluator and mental health expert, has witnessed the heartache and trauma parents create for their children during high-conflict divorces. And for over twenty years, she’s coached her clients on how to avoid needlessly inflicting harm on children during what’s often a grueling time for everyone.

Bonnevier created a preventative model, by serving in a consultation and coaching role to parents who have often used their children as pawns to get back at one another during the divorce process.

She also realized that authoring a book would be a vehicle to both reach parents and expand the services she had long provided to children and families. Written as a fictionalized account of two characters, Luke and Vanessa, steeped in conflict, You Don’t Have to Crush Your Ex: Hints, Hacks, and Hell-No’s to “Win” Your Child Custody Evaluation presents two “wrong” choices made by each of the protagonists, as well as “one” right choice for each.

Bonnevier’s intention was to help readers know how to:?

·?????Present their best selves to a child custody evaluator

·?????Protect their child's emotional health and well-being

·?????Keep their sanity and thrive on the other side of divorce

·?????Discern which attorneys will hurt or help your efforts

·?????Acquire resources to manage specific challenges.

·?????Save time and money

A reader of You Don’t Have to Crush Your Ex, Ciara Gutierrez says, “As a stepmom who walked through this arduous journey of court battles and co-parenting, I can say with full transparency that Lori's book would have dramatically shifted my family's experience with child custody. Her tactful and professional approach is well-balanced with humor, truth, and the necessary need-to-knows. I so wish I had her book 10 years ago!”

“Divorce is far more prevalent than we’d often like to admit, and heart wrenching for those involved––especially the children,” explains Bonnevier. “However, children do as well as their peers when they have one safe parent.”

Since 2002, she has practiced primarily as a child custody evaluator and regularly provides testimony as an expert witness. In these roles, she also serves as a therapist, mediator, parent coordinator, coach, and consultant.

The Honorable Judge Eve Miller acknowledges Bonnevier’s expertise, “The courts throughout Oregon listen to Ms. Bonnevier’s ideas about the best interest of children, and it would behoove parents in high-conflict litigation to do the same.”

Bonnevier graduated from Portland State University in 2000 with a master’s degree in social work and holds undergraduate degrees in the disciplines of psychology and human services and an associate degree in child development. ?Bonnevier has spent her career building her thriving private clinical practice, Child-Focused Choices. She is highly respected within her professional community and well-regarded as an expert in her field.

To get a sneak preview of You Don’t Have to Crush Your Ex, visit: www.ChildFocused.net/Book

The book is also available for purchase on Amazon: https://bit.ly/DontCrushYourExPB

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