Proper Selfishness (Part Two)

Last week, I addressed personal health. This week, it's about recognizing that your own mental health and happiness are not only important, but necessary and that taking care of yourself enables you to be more effective in your relationships. This will mean setting boundaries, practicing self-care, and prioritizing activities that promote your mental health and well-being. It's also about saying “no” when it’s the correct response.

Mental Self-Care and Well-Being: 5 Factors

Reflect on these five factors relating to proper selfishness concerning your mental self-care and well-being:

1. Set Boundaries: This is the most important on this list. Establishing clear boundaries is crucial for protecting your mental health and making you more effective as a leader, manager, colleague, and on the personal front as a spouse, parent, and friend. This involves knowing your limits and communicating them effectively to others. It's about saying no when necessary and ensuring that you don't overextend yourself (I highly recommend the book, Necessary Endings, by Dr. Henry Cloud if you need help or a framework to address this).

2. Regular Physical Activity: Yes, this is a key contributing factor to mental wellness. Exercise is not only good for physical health, but also for mental well-being. Regular physical activity reduces stress, improves mood, boosts overall mental health, and makes you more resilient and able to address stress. The statistic I’ve since repeated is a minimum of 30 minutes of activity such as walking, jogging, or swimming can make a significant difference.

3. Healthy Relationships: Surrounding yourself with supportive and positive people can have a significant impact on your mental health. Healthy relationships provide emotional support, reduce stress, and contribute to a sense of belonging and positive self-worth. Negative relationships can be like emotional sinkholes. Some people’s motto is “I’m not happy until you’re not happy.” Avoid them!

4. Mindfulness and Relaxation Techniques: Practices such as prayer, meditation, deep breathing exercises, and stretching can help reduce stress and improve mental clarity. These techniques help you become more relaxed, stay present in the moment, and more resistant to emotional reactions.

5. Adequate Rest and Sleep: Yes, mom was right. This is the Achilles heel for too many people. Getting enough sleep is essential for mental health. Poor sleep quality and duration can affect mood, cognitive function, and overall well-being. Establishing a regular sleep routine and ensuring you get sufficient rest can improve mental clarity and emotional stability. Turn off or put the phone or tablet away an hour before going to bed.

Now, nothing I’ve posted here is likely new to you (BTW – it’s also easier for me to write this than to do it). I can share candidly that I’ve not always done them well. Points one, three, and five have been on the top of my list for the past several years. I have made progress in these areas and am realizing the positive impact.

Now, it’s your turn to select at least one to work on over this week. Good luck!

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