Promises, Promises... The Key to Building Self-Trust

How the promises we make to ourselves shape our lives

Hello Beautiful Souls,

Do you ever feel like you're letting yourself down? Maybe you promised yourself you'd start that new hobby, or finally take a weekend off to relax, but somehow it just never happened.

Welcome to today’s newsletter, where we delve into a topic that’s both personal and profound: the promises we make to ourselves and the impact they have on building self-trust.

We often think of promises as grand gestures or significant commitments, but it's the everyday, small promises that play a crucial role in our sense of reliability and self-worth. Every time you say you'll do something, no matter how minor, you're making a promise to yourself. The key to self-trust lies in keeping these promises, as they form the foundation of how you view yourself and your integrity.

So today, we're diving into how the promises we make to ourselves—whether we keep them or break them—play a crucial role in building self-trust and how this impacts every aspect of our lives.

It's A Trust Issue

Trust is the foundation of any healthy relationship, including the one we have with ourselves. Yet, we often overlook the importance of self-trust. We make promises to ourselves, only to break them, often without realising how these seemingly small actions can have a significant impact on our self-confidence and overall well-being. Let's explore how keeping our promises, even the small ones, can lead to a stronger, more trusting relationship with ourselves and others.

The Impact of Broken Promises

When we consistently break promises to ourselves, it erodes our self-trust. It’s easy to overlook how missing a workout, postponing a task, or neglecting a personal goal can accumulate into a pattern of self-doubt and disappointment. Each small promise we break chips away at our confidence, subtly reinforcing the belief that we can’t rely on ourselves. On the flip side, when we honour our commitments, no matter how small, we build a reservoir of self-trust. This consistency not only strengthens our self-belief but also positively impacts our relationships with others. People are more likely to respect and trust us when we show ourselves as reliable and consistent, which in turn fosters a healthier, more authentic connection with others.

1. Eroding Self-Trust

Each time we break a promise to ourselves, we chip away at our self-trust. This might not seem like a big deal at first, but over time, it adds up. Just like in any relationship, trust is built on consistency. If you continually let yourself down, it becomes harder to believe in your own capabilities.

2. Affecting Our Relationships

When we can't trust ourselves, it affects how we interact with others. If we're unreliable in our own eyes, how can we expect others to trust us? This can lead to a cycle of broken promises and strained relationships.

3. Undermining Self-Worth

Keeping promises to ourselves is an act of self-respect. When we don't follow through, it sends a message to our subconscious that our goals and desires aren't important. This can gradually erode our self-esteem and overall sense of worth.

Building Self-Trust Through Kept Promises

1. Start Small

Building self-trust doesn't require grand gestures. Start with small promises that are easy to keep. It could be as simple as going for a 10-minute walk every day or setting aside time to journal. The key is consistency.

2. Be Realistic

Set promises that are achievable. It's better to promise yourself something small and follow through than to make grand promises and fall short. This helps build a pattern of success and reinforces your ability to trust yourself.

3. Celebrate Wins

Take time to acknowledge and celebrate when you keep a promise to yourself. This positive reinforcement strengthens your self-trust and motivates you to keep going. Every small win is a step towards a stronger relationship with yourself.

Reflections and Insights

1. Mindful Promises

Be mindful of the promises you make to yourself. Before committing, ask yourself if it's realistic and aligns with your current priorities. Mindful promises are more likely to be kept.

1. Self-Compassion

If you break a promise, practice self-compassion. Instead of being harsh on yourself, acknowledge the setback and understand why it happened. Use it as a learning experience to set better promises in the future.

1. Consistency Over Perfection

Focus on being consistent rather than perfect. It's okay to miss a day or fall short sometimes. What's important is getting back on track and maintaining the habit over the long term.

My Top Three-Question FAQ

1. What if I keep breaking my promises?

It's important to reflect on why this is happening. Are your promises realistic? Are they truly important to you? Adjust your promises to be more attainable and aligned with your values. Start small and gradually build up.

2. How do I rebuild self-trust after breaking promises?

Begin with self-compassion. Acknowledge the broken promises, understand why they happened, and start fresh with smaller, more manageable commitments. Consistency is key, so focus on rebuilding trust step by step.

3. Can keeping promises to myself really impact my relationships with others?

Absolutely. When you trust yourself, it radiates into your interactions with others. You become more reliable, confident, and authentic, which strengthens your relationships and builds trust with others.

In Summary

Promises we make to ourselves are powerful. They shape our self-trust, influence our relationships, and impact our overall sense of worth. By starting small, being realistic, and celebrating our wins, we can build a strong foundation of self-trust that transforms our lives.

In essence, every promise we make and keep is a building block for a stronger, more resilient self-trust. It’s not just about the big decisions or declarations; it’s about the daily actions that reflect our commitment to ourselves. By recognising the value in these small promises and striving to honour them, we reinforce our self-worth and pave the way for deeper, more meaningful relationships with ourselves and those around us. So, start small, be consistent, and watch how your trust in yourself—and the trust others have in you—grows exponentially.

Ready to harness the power of journaling? Start with keeping a small promise to yourself today. Whether it’s writing for five minutes or reflecting on your goals, every small step counts.

Ready to Have Your Own Bespoke Journal?

Been thinking about creating or having your own journal or one you can share with your clients or business customers?

I do those too! Check out my profile to read about my Done-For-You journal creation.

I'd love you to message me to check out some of the beautiful designs I do for my clients, I'm only too happy to show them off. Below is a cover image for my latest client, who decided to GO VIP with her bespoke business branded notebook.

Jo was giving out other people's journals on her retreats and for her clients, missing a trick with her own marketing and client prescence. Now we're bringing together her gorgeous business branded notebook 'Cherish The Essence of You.'

As a VIP client, Jo gets to decide just how much she wishes to share inside her notebook. Typically though, I include things like her details and story as to why she does what she does, her courses and programs and what her clients can expect from working with her, so her clients can not only have her beautiful notebook, but inside is a beautiful reminder of what Jo does, along with space for a selection of her Oracle Cards, journaling prompts, gratitude and of course plenty of space to journal. We're on our design phase, but already have a great basis and we're working on bringing the final format together.

Embrace the magic of journaling and watch as it transforms your life, one page at a time.

Warmest regards,

Nikie Piper – Journal Designer & Creator | Journaling Specialist & Expert

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