Professor Jeffrey Hall's Insights for Enhancing Relationships in the Social Media Age

Everyday Better is LinkedIn News’ weekly personal development podcast and weekly newsletter hosted by Leah Smart, a LinkedIn News Editor . You’ll hear from some of the world's brightest minds and bravest hearts who use science and story to share strategies for how we can flourish individually, in relationship to others and to the world around us. We talk about improving emotional, work, physical and relational health.

?? This year, Everyday Better was awarded a gold medal for "Best Self-Development/Self-Help" podcast from the Signal Awards , one of the most distinguished honors in podcasting. Thanks to you, our community, for helping our work flourish by listening to, watching, and reading it! If you haven't had the chance, please rate us on Apple or Spotify so we can continue bringing you well-being experts and practical insights.

This Week on Everyday Better

It was December 2016 when I stared at my iPhone's home screen and defiantly hovered my index finger over my most-used social media app until I saw the prompt "remove app." For me, there was no additional consideration. I was at the beginning of an important career move and had challenged myself to stop doing anything that drained my time.

Two years would pass before I'd be active on that app again. It was a much-needed hiatus. This challenge did more for me than just provide relief from unrealistic comparisons, doom scrolling, and rabbit holes of Arthur's fist memes: it restored my sense of agency over my time.

A two-year challenge might seem extreme—I admit, my hiatus turned into a lifestyle. However, while I didn’t think I used social media more than anyone else, my relationship with it felt off. In the midst of a big career change, this commitment was right for me. Even though I'd rejoined, I barely used the social apps because I was out of the habit. The goal had been achieved but also came with an unexpected curiosity as time went on: I wondered if while my hiatus helped me focus on professional growth, it simultaneously caused me to miss opportunities to maintain a key aspect of well-being: relationships.

Click here to learn how five days at AWS re:Invent 2024 can help you tackle your most ambitious career goals.

What is the optimal mix of channels of communication that makes us feel like we belong, we're genuinely connected to one another and we aren't missing out?

In an effort to learn more about improving social media use, deepening relationships, and reclaiming our time, I invited Jeffrey Hall , professor of communication studies and the director of the Relationships and Technology Lab at the The University of Kansas , onto the show. He'd just come back from a fellowship at Harvard University ’s Berkman Klein Center for Internet & Society, where he studied the positive aspects of social media on adults.

Within a few minutes, Jeff shared that after his year at Harvard, he had a clearer position on how social apps can positively impact an adult's well-being: discernment on how and why we lean into them along with how often we opt for more traditional ways of connecting is key. In other words, he believes social apps can't be the solve to loneliness. But they can have a positive effect because they allow access to our relationships. However, they miss the mark when it comes to social bonding if they're replaced with phone calls and in-person connections.

Jeff's work and upcoming book, "The Social Biome: How Everyday Communication Connects and Shapes Us " provide a practical guide for adults on framing and taking ownership of their relationships. He views this as an ecosystem of moments of interaction with others. While it may complicate discussions around social apps that can be polarizing, this work is critical for understanding how we can use our intentions and awareness to create healthy ecosystems. You can listen to our conversation here or below:

According to Jeff, there are three clear ways we can strengthen our relationships to make sure we feel connected:

1. Tighten your circle: Focus on better bonds with fewer people. We can only do relationships well with 5-15 people.
2. Increase the signal quality: Don't make text your primary mode of having conversations that matter with people you want to feel more connected to. It's ok to do but a phone call is better and face to face is best.
3. Strengthen the message: Think about how you talk to people in your circle. Make an extra effort to be intentional, compassionate and genuine in conversations.

??Love this quote? Screenshot and share it with someone else ????

Read: "Loneliness and Screens: Causes and Consequences " by Jeffrey A. Hall and Andy Merolla

Read:The Social Biome: How Everyday Communication Connects and Shapes Us (available for pre-order)

?? Know someone who would benefit from my newsletter? Share this link with them to subscribe.

Everyday Better is LinkedIn News’ weekly personal development podcast hosted by Leah Smart , a LinkedIn News Editor. You’ll hear from some of the worlds brightest minds and bravest hearts about how to live with more clarity and intention every day, in and out of work. Subscribe to the show's newsletter .

Follow us: Apple Podcasts | Spotify