Professional advisors…what do you tell a client who tells you they are separating? Run from the lawyers?

People try to avoid lawyers. That’s because of what they traditionally know about them; they lose control and the conflict escalates. I get it. ?

As a professional advisor, it makes sense for clients to confide in you and ask for your help instead. What do you do? Tell them to run?

What if, you could help them get advice but still stay in control?

What if you could give them an option that they will be heard and what matters to them will drive the negotiation, not what matters to the lawyers?

When you operate in an interest based negotiation process driven by goals and outcomes not conflict, you start to talk the language that your client wants.

Tips:

1. Get them to think short term wins, rather than overall big and overwhelming picture. How are they paying the bills, who is paying them, is one person feeling unsure about money, who's telling the kids? ?This will set them up for a winning mindset and for further success in their ongoing negotiations.
2. Make sure they get on top of their emotions. They must be aware of the importance of addressing their emotional wellbeing to ensure they are making sensible decisions and are not driven by fear, guilt, revenge or one of the millions of other emotions that drive behaviour.
3. Get them empowered with knowledge. Do this quickly. This doesn’t mean starting traditional letter writing negotiations between lawyers, but it means obtaining preliminary advice so that they understand the claims that they can make or can be made against them. *Our clients often tell us they wish they came to see us sooner, even just to understand what was possible, instead of rejecting lawyers for all they traditionally stand for. That’s their advantage and it didn’t take much more than one session.
4. Support their negotiation. Talk to them about negotiation options other than court. Even offer to support them in the negotiations, this is often hugely successful and builds trust in the negotiation when the spouse knows and trusts you too. (Be careful to stay in your lane though and do this together with legal advice)

*There are lots of DIY legal negotiation options available where we support clients behind the scenes too. This keeps the clients informed, advised but very much in the drivers seat. Also check out divorce bar, which is an online way of documenting your agreement without any need for lawyers whatsoever. www.divorcebar.com.au

Ultimately the goal is a settlement. Guiding clients behaviour is a way to ensure better communication, less conflict and a negotiated settlement that works for everyone.?

Reach out to our team for more info. www.resolvedivorce.com.au

This article was written by Rose Cocchiaro, Founder and CEO Resolve Divorce