Procrastinate your way to success

Rodrigo MARTINEZ started a great discussion on Linkedin about "Why do most people never achieve success?" (https://www.dhirubhai.net/feed/update/urn:li:activity:6324807877584355328)

It's been going for a while now, and lots of people have posted great suggestions and excellent questions. I'd encourage you to visit the thread.

Roslina Chai also asked a few excellent questions, and I kept running over the word limit for replies. After several replies were to turn into several more, I decided to post this as a reply to some great questions about procrastination. (https://bit.ly/RoslinaChaiQuestion)

Roslina commented that a lack of focus was often driven by fears (e.g., fear of success or fear of failure). I had said that procrastination was a good thing; at least for me. Something I've learned to harness, to listen to, and to use to my benefit (my rationale is at the bottom of this article). 

The Question that Drove This Long Reply

Rosalina's question (as part of her replies) was:

"So perhaps the expression of the procrastinating behavior is as you've described, or perhaps it masks deep underlying fears or inadequacies, or perhaps it's signaling one's spirit is tired and first needs a boost ... How then does one differentiate?!?! ??"

I started to reply with: "It's a great question Roslina. How does one differentiate between procrastination caused by fear, versus mini-holidays, stress response, or insight into our values?" and then quickly ran out of room. Below is what I would have replied in the discussion if I hadn't run out of space.

I think I've procrastinated for most of those reasons. There is no guaranteed way to tell what is motivating a person, but this is what works for me. 

For me, fear has been easy to identify and beat. Fear has a very visceral way of communicating with us. It's not ambiguous when our gut churns, our shoulders tense, and the adrenal gland becomes hyperactive.

Beating fear came relatively easily for me, but you should understand that this is hindsight speaking, not the smugness of genius. It took the first two or three decades to figure out what was working for me. Eventually, I learned that anything that prompts fear, is like a north-pointing compass, at least for me. Steer into it. When I was scared of heights, I went looking for jobs that involved working at height. It worked. The jobs didn't last, but the fear of heights didn't either. When I was scared of commitment in relationships, I tried committing to my next relationship. The relationship didn't work, but the fear vanished.

A more mundane example. If I'm procrastinating in speaking the truth, for fear of offending someone or limiting my career, that is my cue that I need to speak. I should add, it is also a hint that I need to express the truth in a way that is productive for the recipient(s) - and for me. A way that is diplomatic, honest, and effective.

Disclaimer: Just to be clear, I'm talking about irrational fears here. Not the kind of fear response that happens when a bear is chasing you. I'm not suggesting you follow your fear-compass and charge the bear. But if you're still scared of bears while sitting at home five days later, going to the zoo or watching wildlife documentaries might be in order.

Getting back to the point of the question, how do we tell what is motivating our present procrastination? 

Two things that work for me:

1. Intuition
2. Logic

1. Intuition. 

I've spent a lot of time learning to listen to my intuition. Reading about intuition, observing it in myself and others, and even at times, just sitting and listening out for some wisdom. Intuition is the inner voice which speaks softly but insistently to us, and it has become one of my most effective systems. How we sense it is probably different for each of us, and entire books address this topic. But for me, intuition has a tone, an emotion or feeling that is unique. But it's only by listening, and by testing that we learn to recognize it. 

Sometimes intuition is obvious and clear. When it wasn't clear if it was intuition or some other voice (fear, greed, desire, anger, etc.) I started taking mental notes. The next day, month, or year, I would think back to that voice, remember how it felt, and see with the benefit of hindsight, which it was. 

For example, imagine you're faced with a decision of which job to take? Sit in a quiet place for five minutes and listen. How do you feel when you see yourself in one job versus in the other? What is your brain saying? What is your gut saying? Remember that. Write it down if that helps (it will). Come back to this question the next day or next week (or even after you take one of the jobs). Remember how you felt and what you thought? Is it still the same? You'll start to recognize your intuition. 

That process is pretty much me now. And it tells me quickly, whether I'm procrastinating or following my goals and my passions. Or even just doing what I need to do.

The last point on this is something that was a bit of an 'aha' moment for me. I learned to listen to my intuition relatively easily. Learning to trust it was the next big step. So the epiphany for me is that using intuition is a two-step process. First, listen for and recognize your intuition. Secondly, trust it enough to act on it. We've all heard of people who were victims of crime who later said things like "It didn't feel right, but he seemed so nice, and I didn't want to offend." Step two is to take action on that intuition.

2. Questioning (aka using logic)

Looking at whatever I'm doing from time to time and asking "how does this serve me?" Whatever I am directing my attention on is serving me in some way but is it advancing my goals. Facebook might offer a mini-holiday, or it might be a distraction from what I don't want to do. I might even be using it for research (rare but it happens) or marketing or catching up with friends. Any number of reasons. The "Is this advancing my goals question?" is the big one. If yes, "As effectively as a different activity?" If no, "why am I doing this?" 

This last question is just about motivation. It takes some digging sometimes, but I've learned to be non-judgmental. I never criticize my answer. I just try to be honest and objective. Sometimes, for example, it's a great clue that I'm tired, and I just need an early night, a coffee break, or change of activity. 

These sort of questions help me tune into my values. They help me determine which jobs/projects to accept, companies to work with, etc. I say all this like it's obvious, but it was subconscious. At first. With hindsight, I reflected on what was working for me. I looked at my behaviors to understand what I was doing that was effective in my life. 

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For background: my thoughts on procrastination, and why it is a good thing, here are some earlier replies to Rodrigo and others:

Rodrigo, I agree but with one key twist. I'm a bit of a fan of procrastination. Prevailing wisdom says that it is bad. Any prevailing wisdom is my barometer to start thinking about what would happen if I took the opposite view or did the opposite thing.  

And I did that with procrastination. My thinking was that "if it's so bad, why do we do it all the time?" Humans have survived for millennia despite procrastination. Or because of? 

So, I turned procrastination upside down, and now I use it in two ways: 

1. What is it that I procrastinate to? That tells me the sort of things (perhaps not the exact activity but the type of thing) that my brain likes. 
2. What is it that I procrastinate away from? This tells me the sort of things that I'm just plain not suited for.  

An example? Doing a business improvement review or risk assessment for a client. I love the interviews, learning, etc. Writing reports boring for me. I'd procrastinate until the last minute. 

Many of my reports and university assignments were written as all-nighters. I'm not saying that is a good thing, but, in hindsight, it's a big clue to the things I love. Articles such as this one flow from my fingers and I'll procrastinate away from tax paperwork and towards this activity any day. 

My solutions for procrastination are many but here are a few strategies that inform my life today: 

1. I knuckle down and finish the dull stuff as fast as I can. Reports and tax paperwork, for example, have to get done sometime.
2. Where possible, I use diagrams rather than text to express the report (learning about and designing graphics is fun and the clients love them). 
3. I make the reports short. The clients also appreciate that. For clients who wanted the 'thunk' factor of a heavy report dropped on their desk, I just included more narrative, findings, references. If I had to (almost nobody reads such stuff, but for the few who care, it becomes worthwhile).
4. I outsource report writing to colleagues or contractors who enjoy that sort of thing (hey, some people like writing long reports) 
5. I made plans to leave and find better jobs that played to my strengths. 

That last point is the key. Use procrastination. Listen to it and change what you're doing so that you love to wake up in the morning and greet the day. There are countless people who love the jobs that you can't stand! Get out of their way. 

If you're procrastinating or lack focus so often that it is unhealthy or interfering with; rather than supporting; your goals, make a change. Sell the business, leave the job, or whatever needs to change. Not at random or on a whim. Use procrastination to see what you naturally want to focus on. And then think about building a life around that. 

That's what I learned about procrastination. As to what I learned from procrastination?

Well, I learned to build my life around the stuff I loved doing. Speaking with people (the fun learning phase of a consulting assignment), learning, writing succinctly (still working on that one lol).

“Never put off till tomorrow what may be done the day after tomorrow just as well.”

– Mark Twain

If you liked this article, you might also enjoy:

• It can be challenging to reprogram our inner dialogue here are three strategies which have some solid research to back them up ... How to Change Your Self-Talk
• There is one thing above all that can guarantee success. Perhaps the only thing. And it's not really that difficult to apply ... The Secret To Success

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