Pressure, Perfection & Pea Brain

What. A. Weekend.

My little sister got married on Saturday, and here’s what it taught be about B2B sales:

Jk Jk. But seriously what an epic & surreal day. The sky was blue, the rosé was cold, & most importantly, the vibes were immaculate.

My sis, who is actually the middle child, was the first of all my siblings (& all of our cousins) to get to the altar, making this the first wedding of our generation in my family. So, as you might assume, the expectations were high & the pressure was on.

Previously, I never really understood the insane level of nerves that existed amongst the bride & groom on their wedding day. Sure, you’re solidifying the partnership & choice of being with one person for the rest of your life, till death do you part (I always thought this line was a bit.. morbid? We really gotta say the ‘D’ word today of all days?) But anyways, while it is one of, if not THE, most important decision a human will make in their lifetime, you’ve also had ample time to think about it & say “Meh, no thanks”.

But,,,

You both agreed to go on your first date.

You both agreed to go on your second date cuz the first one went good (well, good enough).

You both agreed to stop dating other people.

You both agreed to meet each others’ friends.

You both agreed to meet each others’ families.

You both agreed to go on a trip together.

You both agreed to say “I love you.”

You both agree to move in together.

You both agreed to get engaged.

This is what we like to call in the biz world, a trend. Trends are good… Nay, trends are great. When you identify a consistency, you can then accurately predict results and make informed decisions that will keep you a step ahead. It’s a sort of predictive super power.

So why be nervous? The odds are in your favor. The trends are trending.

But here’s what my pea brain could not understand before: you’re not nervous about whether the other person is going to say yes… OF COURSE THEY ARE. This is not Love Is Blind (great show), this is your partner, your best friend, the person you trust most in this world.

Your nerves come from the expectations & pressure you put on yourself for everything to go perfectly. Because, that is what your wedding is supposed to be… perfect.

HOWEVER, you can’t control the weather. You can’t cook all the food yourself. You can’t make sure everyone stays in their assigned seat. You can’t prevent someone from spilling red wine on your dress within 5 minutes of the dance floor opening (yes this happened).

It’s a tall ask of you, though. You spend months & months meticulously planning the perfect wedding. Every flower, every drink choice, the optimal music playlist, the ideal food menu. And then what? You just have to succumb & hope that the work you did pans out. Trust gravity & hope that the dominos fall exactly how they’re supposed to fall.

And guess what? They don’t.

Perfection is hard. It’s ambiguous. It’s relative. It’s frankly a bit irrational. Unlike the choice of the person standing next you saying “I do,” you haven’t been able to see any trends. There are no practice weddings. Well I suppose there’s the “rehearsal,” duh. Remember, I have a pea brain.

But UNFORTUNATELY the rehearsal DOES NOT account for that one uncle drinking 3 full bottles of Pinot Noir & taking an edible.

But, even if things don’t fall in line exactly with your expectations of perfection, they can still be perfect.

The beautiful part is, the outcomes in the expectation versus the reality both end up the same… You both said “I do.”

Thanks for reading this week. I love love. Trust Fun is so back. See you next Monday. Have the best week & congrats to my sis & new bro. Congrats on what was the perfect wedding.