PREDICTABLY UNIQUE WELLBEING SERIES

We all think we are unique, but in reality, we all suffer, to a greater or lesser extent, from the same anxieties, fears and frailties- we are all human. David Clive Price and Simon Haigh discuss their thoughts on how others can recover from anxiety, addiction and constant fear by reaching their true selves and living a resilient, fulfilling and rich life.

EPISODE 1

DAVID: ANALYSE THE STORIES YOU TELL YOURSELF - Unless we engage a professional therapist, it’s very difficult to find a third party who can help us discover and evaluate the stories from our past that might have an impact on our wellbeing in the present and future.

Who can you refer to? You can of course refer to your friends or family, but a family member - especially a parent - may have profoundly influenced us from an early age without us fully realizing it. It is likely that we remember slights and disagreements, but we don’t remember the actual turning point when something negative turned into an unconscious narrative: this will continue to happen, that this is what you deserve.

How can you begin to change? Only by uncovering these stories and tracing them backwards can you begin to change, or see the stories for what they are perhaps fears, perhaps a source of anxiety, perhaps something that continues to undermine your self-worth.

How do you start unwrapping all this? What triggers your anxiety or depression or stress? What have you told yourself will always happen in these circumstances? Our self-stories are often hidden, which makes them more potent and difficult to challenge. One simple way to get them out into the open is to try making a short list of the three most powerful stories you have told yourself about your life. Then ask yourself if they still hold true or whether they ever held true.

What if the answer is yes or no? If the answer is yes, then you have something to work with. If the answer is no, then you already have a platform for change and growth. By writing things down or identifying them as positive or negative, you place them in the past which is where they belong. The past cannot be changed. The present and future are where you can begin a different story to the one that has been holding you back.

SIMON: TAKE IT EASY & BE AWARE - Take things sure and steadily. Don't rush. Growth is a process - we must respect the growth process as much as the outcomes. Mind your mind, body and soul.  You are the only version of this version of you that you have.

Is awareness key here? Awareness is particularly important as it helps you live more fully in the present, and allows you to seize opportunities that life throws at you, plus keep you safe. I like to think of awareness as a house. What is within the house equates to what your current level of awareness allows you to consciously appreciate. For you to discover new aspects of yourself you need to expand your self-awareness and occasionally step out of your house, explore and then take back what you have absorbed – what you now consciously perceive.

How important is how we perceive the world? How we perceive the world and our lives very much then determines how we live life. So how aware we are of our thoughts, emotions and feelings largely determines how we live and our resultant levels of resilience. As Gandhi said: “A man is but the product of his thoughts; what he thinks, he becomes.” If you predominantly think negative thoughts chances you will fall upon reasons to fail.

How many of us are examining where we are at? Unfortunately, so many of us do not live an aware life, consciously choosing how to perceive what is in front of, and around us. Instead we are passively led by the nose by furtive, passive thoughts, emotions and feelings and often covert, surreptitious behaviour, resulting in a passive life that is determined by events, people and social media. When this transpires, we are effectively handing over our lives to forces that we often need not through lack of a central core of awareness - we are ironically passively allowing our own innate power make ourselves powerless. We are sleep-walking through life, bobbing along over the oceans of fate.

What about mindfulness? One of the ways in which we can “step out of our house” and return with higher level of conscious awareness is through the development of mindfulness - whether through meditation and/or through making a conscious decision to being more mindful in all we do - being truly aware. In this way, through greater self and situational awareness, we can become truly empowered to determine our own path, and grow in an optimal way rather than be forced to randomly react to the currents in the oceans of our life. So, ask yourself “Who am I and what is happening around me” and “Am I best equipped to be as resilient as I can be through being as aware as possible”?

PODCAST AVAILABLE including at AT https://anchor.fm/simonhaigh

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