Predictably Unique Episode 5

We all think we are unique, but in reality, we all suffer, to a greater or lesser extent, from the same anxieties, fears and frailties- we are all human. In this rich, probing and at times challenging podcast series, David and Simon discuss their thoughts on how others can recover from anxiety, addiction and constant fear by reaching their true selves and living a resilient, fulfilling and rich life.

DAVID: LISTEN, OBSERVE AND BE CURIOUS

When we are experiencing inner turmoil, when we are in a panic because something has not worked out as we wanted, our brain leads us wildly from one solution to another. Those with anxiety know this syndrome well. It is a kind of permanent state of danger. We want to extinguish the fire but as soon as one fire is doused another one flares up.

Are we too busy? As we rush around trying various stimulants to make us more alert, or to quieten us down, we lose all sense of perspective. Everything seems imminent. Everything needs to be addressed right now or the very worst will happen.

So how do we move forward? In fact, what we really need to do is to step back from the situation and take a rain check. Do we need to be doing any of this? What if the answer lay not in perpetual activity and fire- fighting but in finding a quiet spot to take stock? The big question to ask when you are in danger of self-harm or doing damage to others is this: What would it be like if? What would it be like if you got up off the floor and went to the phone, what if you stopped drinking for two hours, what of if you turned that betting app off, what if you smiled at your team members in the morning?

What about reflection? There are many things to be curious about even when we are in deep trouble. Standing back helps you to look at your life with a cocked head. You might wonder why or how you have reached this point. You might have an idea that would change the way you think about yourself. What would happen if you called someone you hadn’t spoken to in ages? What if you Googled your condition and found something completely unexpected? Curiosity is one of the strongest of human capabilities. Being curious means, you are not detached from life but still an active participant. It enables you to take a step back from the world and to have an objective moment of truth: “Well, I didn’t know that…”

SIMON: THINK, THINK, THINK

There is a saying in 12 step recovery programs that “my best thinking got me here”. This means that my ideas and thoughts are the reason I ended up needing the recovery program. So “think, think, think” may be a reminder to me to stop and think something through before you take another wrong step.

Tell me more about “think, think, think” “Think, think, think” could also be a reminder to stay present in the moment. We need to live in the moment because yesterday has gone, and tomorrow isn’t here yet (yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery so that is why now is the present). All we have is today.

Didn’t Eckhart Tolle have a lot to say about “The Now” Eckhart Tolle’s wonderful book The Power of Now so powerfully explains that every moment spent worrying about the future or regretting the past is a waste of time, because all you have to live in is the present, the now. “Life will give you whatever experience is most helpful for the evolution of your consciousness. How do you know this is the experience you need? Because this is the experience you are having at the moment.”― Eckhart Tolle, A New Earth: Awakening to Your Life's Purpose.

What about the whole area of self-centeredness? Another aspect of “think, think, think” is that this phrase is a reminder to not be so self-centered. Self-centeredness is our belief that the world revolves around us. Particularly in addition, our self-centered minds believe they are capable of getting everything they want if only they would be left to their own devices. 12 Steps Programs point to self-centeredness being the spiritual cause of the addiction. So, the 12 steps are designed and intended to lead the addict away from self-centeredness and toward a faith in a “Higher Power” – a power greater than themselves. This removes the delusion of self-sufficiency through self-centeredness by admitting our own powerlessness and seeking the aid of a Power greater than ourselves.

Does this also relate to what we say and write? Yes, always assume that what you write particularly online could one day end up in the national media so try not to communicate through the prism of anger anxiety or resentment in particular.

Contact: [email protected] 

Contact: [email protected]