Preach Patience for a Successful Journey Through Therapy

Diana Maatouk , Psy.D/Ph.D - Clinical Psychologist

Deciding to improve your life, regardless of the reason, through reaching out to a therapist is an amazing gift to give yourself.

Expecting that gift to bear results overnight is not.

One of the toughest things that people encounter when they decide to seek out therapy is wanting a solution to present itself quickly so that they can make the necessary changes and move on with their lives.

It’s not a surprising mindset given the shape of the world we live in today.

• If you’re hungry, you can have a full meal cooked in the microwave in fewer than five minutes or delivered to your door in fewer than 30, without even having to talk to another person.
• If you want virtually any product or service, you can use Google, Amazon, or one of thousands of apps to have it delivered to you, sometimes in fewer than 24 hours.
• If you want to talk to or see a friend or family ?member, regardless if they live next door or on the other side of the planet, you can video call them without paying a penny beyond whatever your mobile phone or Internet service costs are.
• Any question you might have ?about any subject on Earth, a few keywords will give you an entire list of answers.

Time Isn’t a Technology

Technology has made our lives definably?quicker and largely easier, but that doesn’t translate into self-improvement coming at an accelerated rate. The best mindset going into therapy is not that you’re going to get a shot or a pill that instantly makes your life better. Rather, that you?are starting a journey to explore the things that have been lacking in your life and determine how to improve in those areas, change bad habits, and start new, better ones that will make you feel better about yourself as you ?move forward.

Succeeding in therapy requires a lot of different factors syncing up together, a lot of work on your end, and the ability to find a therapist you can connect with, feel comfortable with, and be able to rely on to trust with the things that you guard closest to your heart.

Taking the Journey

The idea of life being a marathon, not a sprint, is an oldie but a goodie. The things in life that we strive for: Family, career success, financial independence, etc., are not things that arrive at our house one day in an Amazon box. They take commitment, time, effort, and patience to achieve.

Patience perhaps above all else, because so much of our world is tuned to the idea of instant gratification.

We take the fast lane to work, the express line through security at the airport, we stream our favorite shows using the most powerful digital connections, and we instant?message each other whenever we have a thought, a comment, or a question that we feel requires immediate attention.

Our senses might be able to work at this breakneck speed, but our emotions don’t. Our brains are the greatest computers the world has ever known, but they take time to process complex ideas, situations, and piece together the understanding that only comes through self-exploration, candid conversations, exploring new techniques, and being willing to be vulnerable.

Techniques for Practicing Patience in Therapy

Patience is not always the easiest virtue to incorporate into our lives, especially if we are results-driven and view therapy as a problem waiting to be solved.

These tips can help you find the space and the time to be kind to yourself and invest in the therapy journey.

1. Power down devices in therapy. The average person checks their phone 50-150 times a day[1]. If you’re awake for 16 hours, that’s as many as 9 times an hour! Every time you even check the clock, you are pulling your concentration away from the session and have to reset your thought process.
2. Put in work outside the office: Most therapists will likely give you a bit of homework, or at least something to think about between sessions. Budget time into your schedule free of distractions to take this work seriously, in order to perpetuate your momentum.
3. Don’t expect results on a schedule: Demanding a time that therapy will start to work is like tasking yourself with coming up with the best business idea of all time, but wanting it done by the end of the month. It doesn’t work that way, and trying to force it will only slow things down more and make you discouraged. Treat it like the forging of a new relationship. You don’t ask someone to be friends with an expiration date on the friendship! Consider therapy ?part of your life now and going forward into the future.

[1]?https://explodingtopics.com/blog/smartphone-usage-stats