In Praise of My Dad from Limerick

Thomas Sexton, RIP 1991

'Two men looked out through prison bars

One saw mud, one saw stars!'

My Dad worked hard all his life as a carpenter and joiner and unfortunately at one stage contracted tuberculosis (the dreaded T.B.) which at that time was completely debilitating and was seen as a one way street to an early demise with few signs of treatments evolving.

He ended up spending 3 years in a Sanatorium where he was surrounded by others with a similar affliction, many of whom he outlived and survived. I often think about how he sustained himself in those difficult times. I remember him as always having a happy demeanour and was a great man for the one liners or two liners when we were faced with challenges.

'I used to have the blues because I had no shoes,

But then I happ'ed to meet a man who had no feet'

He introduced me to the power of the written word and the importance of self talk. His favourite book was called the 'Self Educator' which gave the rudiments of most topics pertinent to success from basic mathematics through to good manners.

I can picture him reading avidly in the hospital bed, keeping the dream alive for a brighter and better future. In our house my Mother did most of the talking and would have appeared as the boss to those visiting yet my Dad had few words which were often incisive and powerful because of their infrequent availability.

At one stage we were going through a very difficult patch as our home was subjected to a Compulsory Purchase Order by the local council to facilitate widening the road and 'urban renewal'. My Mother visited the council offices regularly and wrote consistently many times to absolutely no avail. The challenge was that the CPO process was started by the council but they did not have the funds to complete the process in a timely manner and about 15 years of our lives were caught up in suspended animation.

In this period there was one interaction in the proceedings that is etched very clearly in my brain. On this occasion my Dad and I visited a Senior Executive at the council offices and I was expecting him to be his normal quiet soft spoken self. The senior official had a somewhat superior attitude and he outlined the impending process to us in some detail. My father was clearly not happy. He had worked his whole life to own his property in his native city and it was completely unencumbered and had a 'fee simple' title. Sexton is a name which is indelibly linked to the establishment and development of Limerick City and when my father responded he spoke slowly and clearly and said

'this whole thing reeks of the Saxon battering ram'.

In a single sound bite he seems to have captured all that was wrong with the process and it was even more poignant when addressed to this particular gentleman. It is worth noting that one of our ancestors Edmund Sexton from centuries back had ransacked all the monasteries and churches in the region at the behest of King Henry VIII. The Sextons certainly understand being under siege. We wanted to be treated fairly and with courtesy but rest assured we were not going to go quietly if our rights were being infringed. From that moment onward our relationship with the council improved and we were treated with parity of esteem. It's weird for me to reflect over a fifteen year period and multiple discussions that this single phrase articulated by my father not only summed it all up but actually changed the whole proceedings.

Sometimes, less is more when we say it with a resolve and a deep subconscious efficacy that frightens the 'bejaysus' out of people.

We Limerick people are an awkward, intransigent tribe. We've been under siege for ever and we're happiest inside the walls with the enemy outside. This has been how I have coped with life, defending myself against the enemy outside.

Is it time now to ask is the enemy within ourselves? Is it time to unleash the latent potential of this great city and build on our previous successes and more importantly our previous failures?

'Two Men looked out through prison bars,

One saw mud, One saw STARS!'

Raymond Sexton

7th March 2018