In Praise of Appreciation | Try It When Gratitude Feels Hard

Some years ago I was on a gratitude kick - my personal learning from that deep dive:?

Gratitude is always available. In?any given moment or circumstance we can choose it. When we choose it, our perspectives shift and new possibilities open.

I still believe that AND I still think cultivating gratitude is important AND sometimes getting to the perspective shifting, possibility opening kind of gratitude can feel quite hard?in the moment. This brings me to appreciation?which I’ve been thinking about a lot more lately.

Why? It’s an easier and quicker shift!?Let me explain:

• Appreciation is more rooted in the present moment (always a good place to be).
• Just like gratitude, leaning into appreciation is a choice we can make all the time and definitely shifts perspective, opens possibility, and fosters connection and trust.
• Appreciation naturally lends itself to more specificity which fosters more interest and connection.

Here’s are 3?examples:

1. Acknowledging a colleague

A?colleague of mine is a master at simplification. Something can feel so tangled and complex and she can, in an instant, offer an idea or different POV that clarifies and simplifies. Appreciation in a moment when she does that looks like this, “Wow, thank you. I love it when you do that. It would have taken me days to get to such a concise view.” She knows and hears her superpower and value in the moment. We both move forward more connected and motivated.

2. A walk in the rain (and toddlers in general)

I was with my 1.5 year old, it was raining and what should have been a 2-minute walk to the car took 15 minutes. She was stopping to appreciate every leaf, rock, and stick she found on the sidewalk. We were both getting wet. Was I grateful for the rain our snail’s pace? Not really. But what I was able to get to in the moment was appreciation - “Sweetie, that is a really beautiful stick.” and “Look, do you see the rain?” To which she replied, “Wooowww, rain.” And so we walked those two blocks appreciating the rain (and literally everything else that crossed our path).

3. Dinner table conversation

For those celebrating Thanksgiving this week or with holiday dinners on the horizon perhaps the question will be asked, “What are you grateful for?” and I bet a lot of people around the table might say “Family” or “Health” which is great AND very general. A little more specificity and connection might be created by shifting the question to, “What are you appreciating these days?” My answer: I’m really appreciating my daily neighborhood walks, drawing cats with my daughter and cinnamon chamomile tea. Am I grateful for these things too? I am, but somehow the language of appreciation is what drew these answers out of me more easily.

Give appreciation a try and let me know how it works for you!

*Photo is a glimpse into the appreciation happening at our house these days :)

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If you or someone you know are considering coaching with me you can learn more at www.elisabethkingsley.com. The first step is always a free intro call. I'd love to connect.

I?help people become better listeners. The outcome of our work together is more effective leadership, less chaos amidst?transition, tamer inner critics and deeper self-trust. Learning to?listen more deeply to yourself and others is a skill you won't regret.