Practicing Self-Compassion While Navigating Grief at Work

I have covered how organizations can support grieving co-workers and create a more compassionate culture. This article is all about the grieving employee and how to navigate grief while working.

Losing a loved one is never easy, and when grief hits, it can be challenging to focus on work. However, for most of us, working while grieving is something we have to do. It is not uncommon for people to return to work even while mourning. In such instances, you may find yourself struggling with your emotions.

As difficult as it may be, the key to moving forward through grief is to allow yourself to feel what you are feeling. Your emotions are normal and natural, and they don't make you weak or unprofessional. There is no "right" way to deal with grief, but here are some self-compassion tips that can help you navigate through it while still being productive at work:

1. Be kind to yourself: Remind yourself that it is okay to feel what you are feeling. Don’t beat yourself up for not being productive, and don’t compare yourself to others who may be dealing with grief differently.

2. Don’t isolate yourself: While it can be tempting to withdraw from people during this time, try to stay connected with colleagues or friends who can support you and lift your spirits.

3. Set boundaries: It’s understandable to want to work hard and take on extra projects to take your mind off the sadness. However, it's important to remember that your physical and emotional needs are a priority, so you should set boundaries to ensure that you don’t over-exert yourself.

4. Practice mindfulness: Mindfulness techniques such as deep breathing, meditation, or yoga can help you manage the overwhelming emotions that come with grieving. Aside from yoga, the 4-7-8 breathing technique saved me from experiencing numerous anxiety attacks while at work.

5. Take breaks: Make sure you are taking breaks throughout the day to relieve stress and allow yourself time to relax.

6. Be patient with yourself: There is no time frame when it comes to grieving, so be patient with yourself as you learn to adjust to your new normal. Remember that there isn't a "right" way to approach this.

Remember that it’s okay to put yourself first, particularly when navigating grief at work. These compassionate tips can help you navigate life after loss with grace and empathy.

Just a few more things to keep in mind...

Allow yourself to grieve on your own terms. Perhaps you need time off after the loss of a loved one, and that's okay. If you do choose to return to work immediately, recognize that you'll need time to adjust, and it won't happen overnight. You'll also want to be frank with your employer and colleagues about your situation. Be honest with them about your needs without oversharing your personal information.

Everyone's different regarding how they deal with grief. Some prefer to throw themselves into work as a distraction, while others find comfort in seeking support from friends, family members, or grief counselors. Regardless of how you navigate grief, consider finding healthy ways to manage through it while at work. By the way, using "work" or keeping busy is one way to ignore, suppress, or mask your grief and this will only prolong your ability to heal.

It's also essential to make sure you are taking care of yourself. Grief is not only exhausting emotionally but it can be taxing mentally and physically as well. Prioritizing self-care activities is vital as you navigate grief. Maintain a healthy lifestyle by drinking lots of water, eating well-balanced meals, and keeping up with your exercise routine. Avoid unhealthy habits like overeating, drinking excessively, or abusing drugs. These unhealthy habits are also ways in which we suppress and mask our pain. I'll have much more on this in a separate article.

Finally, seek support when necessary. Whether it's from friends, family, your faith community, or support groups, don't hesitate to reach out for help. If you are struggling with grief, consider speaking to someone who specializes in grief and healing. Your employee assistance program can provide referrals to mental health professionals in your local area. And as always, I too, can support, guide and teach you some tools to help navigate your grief and healing journey. Direct message me anytime.