The Practice of Groundedness - a review of a gem by Brad Stulberg

Glad to have digested this book over the December Holidays and sharing with you some insights and learnings!

Brad Stulberg- wrote and published this book in Year 2021 right in the middle of COVID-19. This is a great eye-opener piece for me that finally explains that withot self-awareness, and even the most successful CEOs, and Elite athletes- continue to remain : unfulfilled and burnt-out, even if they have spending much time, energy- chasing/achieving- money, fame, relevance, busyness. My biggest takeaway from this book is first the need to establish and acknowledge one's own core values (which can be different from others), and acceptance of the current state, how then subsequently, success/goals can be defined , then achieved through a deliberate and measured process of patience, presence and authentic interaction with a selected community of friends in work /personal life.

Not all of the 6 practices by Stulberg, were straightforward to execute, but summarize them as a quick read for you ! 6 key summary practices to actualize a fulfilled life:

1. Choose Acceptance over Delusion(Self Denial !) & Wishful Thinking
2. Choose Prescence over Distraction
3. Choose Patience over Speed
4. Choose Vulnerability over Invincibility
5. Choose Community over Isolation
6. Choose Movement over sitting still

#1 Choose Acceptance over Delusion

Acceptance in Practice

1.1 Accept where you are. Identify your core values.

1.2 Get clarify of your situation : Use the lens of a wise observer ( including self distancing), to see your siutation clearly without being fused to it; zoom out !

1.3 Judge yourself with kindness and self compassion (rather then harshly) :"Accept that this is what is happening now, and your are doing the best you can ".

1.4 After Acceptance and Clarity of your station : Chose a response that aligns with you core values.

#2 Choose Prescence over Distraction

2.1 Recognize your addiction to distraction, checking your phone every few minutes, logging on to social media when you wake up, unable to log off email. Be conscious if you have associated nonstop notifications as a validation of your importance in the world.

2.2Practising Presence

Make a Not-to-Do list - to free your mind and time of unnecessary things

Forget about Productivity in the form of 'go with the flow' business, and think about Productive Activity Instead.

Commit to distraction free blocks of deep-focus work - free from digital distraction on planned productive activity.

#3. Choose Patience over Speed

3.1 Practicing Patience

Patience neutralizes our inclination to hurry, rush, and overemphasize acute situations in favour of playing the long game. The process of progress - is such that when you take small and consistent steps over time, you give your yourself the best chance of massive gains.

Process over outcomes - taking small steps for big gains. This requires cultivating a process mindset: First set a goal, Next - figure out the discrete steps, then forget about the goal, and focus on executing those steps instead. Acknowledge that in ceaselessly moving fest, and getting swept up in heroic individualism, may be our own way to confront the things we fear most.

#4 Choose Vulnerability over Invincibility

Vulnerability means leaning into our soft spots, perceived weaknesses. It builds trust with other, when it is authentic and not performative. It is a conduit to community - that also sustains acceptance, presence and patience- the supportive space where a grounded life unfolds.

#5 Choose Community over Isolation

To have a personal and professional community - means to be supported by a group of friends who are motivated by the same idea and practice, without which you cannot go far as an individual. Its network, you need to take deliberate steps to build and sustain.

In worklife, we also need to develop a 'braintrust' - a group of trusted individuals - who can be completely honest, solutions-oriented, preferably those who have prior more experience and thus empathy.

#6 Move your body to ground your mind

Movement is not just exercise, but the process of pursuing physical challenges and activities, that challenge our bodies beyond its comfort zone ( and pain threshold ), as an increment way to build strength, fitness. Movement, supports the physical health, mental health and well being, but reinforces all the principles of groundedness : presence( and focus), patience, consistency, a way to build deep community, acceptance (to discomfort).

Concluding: Successful practice of "Groundedness", is to approach it deliberately with care and the intention to continually grow:: akin to an "infinite game'. Definitely encourage you to pick up this good book, with its illustrative examples and case studies... as much better that understand the espoused principles!