Practice Compassion To Be Happy

“If you want others to be happy, practice compassion. If you want to be happy, practice compassion.” –?Dalai Lama

If there is one thing that unites humanity, it is the deep desire to be happy.? We seek it. We long for it. We surrender our will to others trying to obtain it. The endless search for happiness can create confusion, sadness, frustration, and a deep sense of longing. The frustration we feel is from seeking happiness in the wrong places. Until we understand where to find it, we will spend a lifetime suffering and searching with only brief moments of joy.

Practicing medicine in urgent care, allows me the privilege of treating many young children for a variety of medical complaints. Even though they are seeing me due to an illness or injury, it is fascinating to observe their behavior, under what would seem to adults to be a stressful situation.?

The average 2-3 year old, will vigorously resist me examining them, which is a normal stage of development. This often includes crying, kicking, and pushing me away.? The most fascinating part is once the exam is over, they will usually start playing again, smiling, and often will either hug me or give me a fist bump or high five.?

Young children are not seeking happiness. It came with them when they arrived into this world. They experience it to the fullest,? viewing life with wonder, curiosity, laughter, and excitement. While they may become temporarily frustrated and have a brief tantrum from time to time, they are over it in a few seconds to minutes. They do not hold grudges like adults.

They are loving, forgiving, and have a kind heart, often displaying compassion for others, including their favorite toys and stuffed animals.?

As time passes, we are surrounded by others in our family, schools, and circle of friends who are constantly conditioning us, with either rewards or punishment based on our behavior. You are told that you are only “good” if you obey and “bad” if you don’t. The innate sense of happiness and compassion begins to slowly dwindle as we move into adulthood. For most adults, happiness is so deeply buried that it is barely recognizable.?

The search for happiness outside of ourselves begins early in life, once the constant conditioning begins. We begin seeking approval from others, with many conditions attached. Unable to meet all of those conditions, one is left feeling unloved and unworthy. The search for happiness outside of yourself begins.?

Where did my happiness go??

Why don’t I feel it anymore?

The place where you can always find happiness is within you. It is already who you are as a being, in your natural state. You are not your conditioning or what has been done to you.?

Just as one needs to love themselves before they can love another, practicing compassion with oneself first, gives us the capacity to give it to another. Compassion spills out of us, once our spirit is filled with love, kindness, and compassion for ourselves, in spite of our human imperfections.?

Compassion is acceptance of a being as they are without conditions, feeling empathy for their situation, and seeing beyond their circumstances. It is not pity. It is acknowledging their suffering, coming from a place of unconditional love.?

Compassion is also realizing that one is doing the best they know how to do, given their current level of consciousness and awareness, including yourself.?

If you are hard on yourself and rejecting the perfect being you are underneath your own human conditioning, you will also be hard on others, expecting perfection. Relationships will suffer and you will suffer greatly.?

Make time to reflect and really look within, to get in touch with your inner being… that which animates your human form.? Who you really are as a being is always present underneath the workings of your mind,? without going to distant lands or obeying the rituals and rules of someone else. You have access to the wisdom of the universe within you at any time, whether or not you think you are worthy of it. It is unconditional and always present within you, even if you are currently unaware of its presence.?

In the space between words, in moments of silence, and when your mind is not actively engaged in obsessive overthinking, you can find yourself again, including the happiness and compassion you had when you were very young, before the world changed you.?

Practice compassion for yourself.? As you do, others will feel compassion emanating from you, to lighten their burdens too. It costs nothing to be kind to others; most especially to yourself.?

Resources and Support

If you need help finding yourself again, message me directly to schedule a discovery call: [email protected]