Powerful Women Practice Gratitude

The Focus Forward Formula: Propelling More Women Lawyers to Power Positions

I'm on a mission to propel more women lawyers to power positions where they can have more control over their careers, compensation, and courage. Today, I discuss?how to create a more powerful presence to propel you forward.?

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Powerful Women Practice Gratitude

“Be thankful for what you have; you’ll end up having more. If you concentrate on what you don’t have, you will never, ever have enough.”

-- Oprah Winfrey

I will be honest, practicing gratitude does not come naturally to me, even during Thanksgiving. I hated that tradition of going around the table and sharing what you are grateful for. In particular, I don’t think I am alone among Type A people (which most lawyers are). We have been programmed to always strive for more, and gratitude does not also seem consistent with that.?

Yet practicing gratitude is helpful for your career and your mental well-being. And I found that the more I practiced gratitude, the better I became as a leader and a person—and the more successful I was. And in my discussions with powerful women, I learned that most of them engage in a gratitude practice and believe it has helped them find both contentment and success.

Why Gratitude is Difficult

People default to negativity - even optimists. Our negativity bias gives greater weight to negative experiences than positive ones. And when your brain is programmed to focus on all of the not-so-great things about your career, feeling thankful at the same time is not easy.

Gratitude is also tricky because we constantly compare ourselves to others, and here, we rarely compare ourselves to those who have not gotten to our level. Instead, we focus on those who we believe have outshone us. We create negative inner talk and begin to undervalue all that we have accomplished and be grateful for.

One colleague who fell prey to this kept a list of all the statistics that demonstrated how much more she had achieved than many others and people who had their greatest successes later in life. She also began to include in her accomplishments, not the standard work ones such as title and compensation, but also how she impacted others through mentoring and her volunteer efforts.

Finally, in the hustle culture that many of us are currently part of, it is hard to take a moment and be grateful because we are so focused on the next thing. However, enjoying that moment and being grateful helps you feel successful and reinforces your beliefs in yourself and what you want to accomplish.?

Gratitude Helps Careers

Gratitude toward yourself and others can have a very positive impact on your career. People who are grateful for their accomplishments also express more gratitude towards others.

Here are a few ways gratitude propels you forward:

• Gratitude makes you a more effective leader. Studies have found that gratitude is a more robust method of influencing change than criticism. Moreover, engagement, dedication, and creativity also increase in teams that feel appreciated. This all leads to great effectiveness and efficiency. All of which will make you and your team shine.
• Gratitude increases your achievement.?The more you practice gratitude, the more positive you are and believe in your ability to meet if not exceed your objective.?
• Gratitude improves decision-making.?Stress is a factor that takes up a lot of mental space and makes you focus too much on what could go wrong rather than what could go right. People who practice gratitude reduce stress, approach problems more even-handily and creatively, and have more mental room for making effective decisions. They also have reduced the mental space taken up by worry-filled energy.?
• Gratitude increases your productivity.?Gratitude increases self-esteem and reduces insecurity. This means that it can help us focus and improve our productivity.?

Three Ways to Practice Gratitude

As I mentioned earlier, appreciating what you have is not a natural default, but the benefits include greater resilience, more self-esteem, and lower stress. ?And like all new habits take practice and patience. Here are three ways to build a gratitude practice.

1. Keep A Gratitude Journal

Okay, if you are like me, your eyes are already rolling. However, the research shows that writing five small things you are grateful for will boost your mood and make you feel more optimistic. Again, it does not have to be life-changing things. It could be positive feedback, making a dent on your to-do list, or finally making that doctor’s appointment you put off.?

As with all habits, it is best to have a regular time you do this. Mornings or evenings tend to work best.

2. Take A Gratitude Moment

Get up from your desk or cubicle, get outside (or maybe walk around your office), and walk or incorporate some physical movement in your day which has the added benefit of lifting your endorphins.

I do an abbreviate version of this on my so-called “run,” which many?may call a walk. All you need to do is take 15-20 minutes to go for a walk or run alone (so you have time and space to think). Spend that time thinking about all aspects of your career you’re grateful for. It’s a surefire way to press pause and feel more appreciative of your career, regardless of how that day went.

There is a beautiful part of my route on my version where I think about what I am grateful for. Making it part of my routine at a particular spot makes it more likely that I will engage in the practice.

3.????Express Gratitude Toward Others??

The more you express gratitude toward others, the more you feel gratitude toward yourself and what you accomplish. Additionally, expressing gratitude toward others also improves your feelings about your life and work.

These are just suggestions to engage in a gratitude practice. The important thing is that you do something whatever feels right for you.?

HAVE A WONDERFUL THANKSGIVING AND REMEMBER TO BE GRATEFUL FOR ALL THE GREAT THINGS YOU ARE AND HAVE ACCOMPLISHED.?

Sheila is the CEO of Focus Forward Consulting. She helps intelligent and accomplished women lawyers go from uncertain and uninspired to unstoppable and attain power positions where they have greater control of their careers, compensation, and courage.