Powerful Women Build Boundaries

I'm on a mission to propel more women lawyers to power positions where they can have more control over their careers, compensation, and courage. Today, we talk about building boundaries.

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In the movie, "The Devil Wears Prada," we see our heroine Andie, when she is supposed to be watching a Broadway show with her visiting father, standing on a street corner trying to arrange transportation for her boss during the middle of a hurricane believing that this little bit of weather cannot shut down flights. Andie has no boundaries, and she has handed away her power.

Setting boundaries is critical to our well-being and sense of control. It also enhances workplace effectiveness because people know how to work with you, and you are not constantly reacting to what others want. It also allows us to prioritize what is the most important. Also, remember boundaries are personal—what is your boundary may not be someone else’s. Also appreciate that if a culture does not honor your boundaries, it may not be the right fit for you.

Potential Workplace Boundaries

• Asking people not to call at home after a specific time
• Committing to a family routine
• Taking vacation time
• Telling people you’ll only check work email between certain hours
• Saying no to projects you are unable to take on due to a full workload
• Approaching your manager about situations you feel violate your boundaries and working together toward a solution

How to Establish Boundaries

• Understand what your boundaries are and why
• Value your boundaries
• Communicate your boundaries clearly and precisely
• Practice enforcing those Boundaries
• Know the Circumstances Where You Will Drop those Boundaries
• Practice Consistency.
• Be Prepared for Boundary Breaches and Know How to Handle

Boundary Discussions

When discussing your workplace boundaries, you want to approach it from the impact on work perspective. Make sure you are clear on your boundaries and why, and don’t set a million boundaries simultaneously. People will not remember all, and may assume bad intentions.

Also, if someone breaches a boundary—do not assume bad intentions. Instead, explain to them the limitation and why it is essential and helps with overall effectiveness.

For example, if a manager or client makes an unreasonable request, instead of saying, “I’m really stressed,” or “I have too much to do,” frame your explanations in something concrete. Explain your objection regarding how it will affect other projects, clients, or your bottom line: “If I spend my time on X, there won’t be enough time to do Y.” Also, ask why you need this and try to open up a dialogue where you can collaborate to create a solution.

Remember, clear and consistent boundaries help you and others operate more effectively, impactfully, and healthily. Also, setting boundaries is a journey that may not happen all in one shot but takes time. Again, consider a move if your limits are purposefully ignored.

What more insights?

• Check out this article where I share the 10 Tips For In-House Counsel Struggling to Advance. In this guide, I share my time-tested tips for in-house counsel to release fear, jump-start your career, and propel you towards promotion.
• Check out this article where I share the 9 Tips for Lawyers Struggling to Build a Book of Business In this guide, I share my time-tested tips to release fear, transform your relationship with business development, and launch your rainmaker journey.

Sheila is the CEO of Focus Forward Consulting. She helps intelligent and accomplished women lawyers go from uncertain and uninspired to unstoppable and attain power positions where they have greater control of their careers, compensation, and courage.