Power your way to success

What is power?

Power; what does that word mean to you? How does it make your feel? When you think about it, does it create thoughts of achievement and strength, or times when power has been used detrimentally and held you back?

I would define power here and now as personal power. It’s the confidence to get things done. The feeling that you have a voice, the ability to make an impact. You have a purpose, you show up in a positive way and you know how you can make a difference. You feel confident to challenge and speak up, make tough choices when necessary and stand by your core values so your consistent and people know what to expect from you. As a leader, you can lead using a ‘what’ and ‘how’ ap-proach. You’re able to define the vision and ‘what’, but are clear on ‘how’ this can be achieved re-alistically. You’re appreciative of the talents in your team, supportive, and recognise success, and drive a positive culture of purpose and commitment. It’s a feeling of inner calm, where everything is aligned and you can be your best.

Are we losing power?

That’s a big description of power! Realistically we won’t experience these things all at once, but each of these can drive us to feel powerful in a moment. We have more options, choices and information than ever before, yet I notice around me that more than ever we are feeling less powerful. Constantly living up to ideals, trying to make all parts of our lives a success. We’re facing more complexity and challenge in our professional lives and roles. How do we drive more opportunities to feel powerful?

Do we need to be empowered?

Often the focus is about empowering ourselves to achieve greater things. The suggestion that we need things or people to give us power. It’s enabling those who work for us to feel purposeful, able to do their best work and reach their goals. Often, we can feel powerful if we are leading something, but if we’re having a meeting with our CEO our power might seem different. Some people are starting to question the notion of empowerment and I think I agree. What if we already have power, and we don’t need someone or something to give us the power? If we are in a powerful role how can we ensure that we don’t stifle the power of others?

Personal power

If I think about a time when I have felt powerful, it is usually when I am coaching. The reason I feel powerful is because we create a powerful space; asking questions, challenging assumptions, creat-ing clarity and goals and driving commitment. All done with unconditional positive regard. The focus is fully on the individual, the time is precious and the space sparks new thoughts. It’s the moments where you see people make sense of something, have that ‘ah ha’ moment, or think and feel dif-ferently. That moment when they leave the room feeling strong, focused and energised. They walk out of the door feeling powerful.

Losing personal power

If I think of times in my working life when I’ve felt less powerful its usually been when I’ve been over ruled, talked over, not heard or undermined. There are always people in our working lives who champion us and bring out the best in us. They see our potential and encourage us to grow and progress. This results in us feeling powerful, pushing forwards and continuing to make progress. But there are also those we come across who might not believe in us, they see things differently, might have a different style or we just can’t connect. Perhaps they favour hierarchy over skill, or maybe they avoid you or don’t listen when you speak. The words we use, the approach we take, the expectations we make, and the challenges we give, can significantly impact the power another person can feel.

People have power don’t take it away

In ‘Powerful’ Patty McCord (the former Chief Talent Officer at Netflix), describes the process they went through to grow the business through its people. She’s not convinced by the term empowerment, she says; ‘Engaged employees probably deliver high quality performance, but too often engagement is treated as the end game, rather than serving customers and getting results. There’s so much concern with empowering people only because the prevailing way of managing them takes their power away…People have power. A company’s job isn’t to empower people; it’s to remind people that they walk in the door with power and to create the conditions for them to exercise it. Do that and you will be astonished at the great work they will do for you’.

Why is power important?

Amy Cuddy shared a video last week where she talked about Power. She says power is not about power over another. It's the feeling you are capable, that you are skilful, that you can get stuff done. The feeling of self efficacy. When people feel that way it changes the way they feel, they are more optimistic about themselves and others. They feel more confident, they feel happier. They think differently, they are less constrained, less anxious and less fearful. This frees them up to be more creative, and see the idea of failure as something that's ok. They can take risks and they can think in a different way. They take action. If we feel powerful it causes action.

When people feel powerless, they do not act, they withdraw and they shut down. It activates the behavioural inhibition system and shuts you down. As individuals and organisations, we want to feel and think more powerfully. It clearly has positive benefits for all.

Create a culture of power

If we want to grow, progress and perform at our highest, and if we want our people to perform at their highest, we need to ensure we create the conditions for people to have personal power. What this means is understanding and enabling the simplest things. Vision and story. Clarity and information. Connection and purpose. Humility and challenge with positive intent. Practicing daring leadership and trust in others to get the job done well in their own way. Active listening and appropriate feedback. A voice for everyone in the space where they are expert. Respect and directness, rather than hierarchy and control. It’s creating an environment and mindset where we are able to use our skills and knowledge to power ourselves and our goals and achievements forwards. Let’s take a look at some of these examples.

Our mind is a powerful tool

Our mind is our most powerful tool. Why do we feel powerful on tough days and in other similar situations we retreat frustrated? Our mindset helps us gain perspective, use realism and positive thinking, and see shades of grey and avoid polarisation. Our ability to regulate our emotions is driven by our mindset and can either power us forwards or hold us back. Recognising our values, opinions and habits can determine how we react to situations and ultimately how powerful we think we are to change or manage a challenging situation successfully. (See more about mindset in one of my earlier blogs here).

Imposter Syndrome sucks our power

Imposter Syndrome is a psychological pattern which causes people to doubt their capabilities and who then squash their accomplishments because they don’t feel worthy of praise or fear being exposed as a fraud. Often this is hidden and rarely shown but can impact massively on our ability to feel powerful and get stuff done. It’s becoming more understood with people such as Sheryl Sandberg, Amy Cuddy and Michelle Obama experiencing it and talking about it. Men are just as likely to suffer from it too, but are a lot less likely to talk about it.

I often hear from leaders where they feel they lack power, they are sure people don’t believe in them or maybe they just aren’t going to achieve what they need to. They are all brilliant and nail it every day, but this thought process holds them back and sucks the power out of them. They hide, or speak up less, lose clarity, don’t make the tough decisions or give the honest feedback that’s needed to drive things forward.

We feel powerless at the top

People are experiencing personal power struggles at all levels of the organisation. HR Grapevine recently shared research by AXA PPP Healthcare, who found that one in five SME owners are convinced that someone else would be better suited to running their business than them. This is common amongst many business owners. The impact on performance can be significant as people might procrastinate from completing tasks over fears of getting it wrong, or avoid the opportunity to progress. Some business owners have found that this has prevented them from taking their business to the next level.

We feel powerless throughout the organisation

A recent study by Docebo (reported in HR Magazine) found that a third of workers feel unqualified for their roles. The fear of being ‘found out’ is impacting their wellbeing. A third of UK workers don’t feel qualified for their current job and more than half don’t think a co-worker is either. With an impact on wellbeing, one in four experience anxiety at least once a month that they may be let go from their jobs due to lack of skills. However, the report suggested that training and development can help to resolve some of this. How much emphasis do you put on asking for the training you might need? As an organisation how much priority do you put on investing in your people to enable them to grow?

Power changes our brains and behaviour

There is scientific evidence that experiencing power changes the way you think, perceive, and relate. In a recent Fast Company article by David Rock and Mary Slaughter (Fast Company) they share that people with perceived power (in a hierarchy) think (and speak) more abstractly in the ‘what’. They’re more optimistic and less sensitive to risk, because they consider things in terms of desirability rather than feasibility. They may not see the full picture of what their plans mean in reality to get them done by themselves or by their teams. This type of thinking can then create possible risks for the business.

We need to think about the ‘what’ and the ‘how’

Successful leaders need to be able to use both approaches to thinking and be able to connect them. But brain science shows this is difficult because there are different brain systems for evaluating “why” and “how” when it comes to goals. The why areas relate to abstract thinking, mentalizing, and inferences about intentions. The how connects to concrete actions, execution, and motor control. When one is activated, the other goes on standby. So, we need to consciously work hard to use both.

Leaders need to recognise the appropriate times for ‘what’ and ‘how’ thinking and approach. This could be engaging your team in a discussion about your vision and plan and how your vision links into the overall company goals. Then collaborating on how to bring your vision and plan to life. Finally, agreeing how to achieve the goals, and then refining these to make them realistic and achievable for you and the team. By involving your team you’re connecting them to the overall goal and their part in it, driving purpose and impact. Both you and your team will have a powerful plan and a team energised and powered to achieve it.

Leadership & power

People leave managers and leaders more than companies. How we are treated, if we have a say, if we feel connected and if we think we can contribute can all impact how much we enjoy our work and working day. We might be a leader or aspire to be one, or perhaps report into an inspiring leader, or struggle following the leader in our organisation. It’s clear that poor leadership can have a detrimental effect not only on profits, but also on the power people feel they have, what they can deliver and the results they achieve.

Moving from armoured leadership to daring leadership

In Brene Brown’s most recent book ‘Dare to Lead’ she defines leadership in two ways; armoured and daring. Her work is backed up by numerous studies in organisations and years of research. If we want to ensure that we and the people we work with have the power to get things done we need to become more daring in our leadership approach.

Armoured leadership – use power over

What makes power dangerous is how it is used when organisational life is hierarchical. If used badly it manifests where those in leadership positions hold power over others by making decisions that benefit the minority and oppress the majority. Interestingly, when people who are powerless are promoted into a role with power, they will usually repeat the same behaviour. They might think, ‘why should I care about others when nobody cared about me?’. When someone holds power over us our instinct is to rise, resist and rebel.

I’ve coached people over time who have struggled with feeling powerless because of their boss.

They might constantly be questioned, directed and have little opportunity to add their own thoughts or suggestions to work or approach. This can be stifling to creativity, motivation, engagement and performance, for even the most engaged and talented people.

Poor leadership and management can reduce trust and without trust we can’t feel powerful if we think that we aren’t trusted. We will question ourselves even when we know we are right about something. I’ve seen powerful, strong, high performing people struggle with a boss like this.

Others include the micro-manager, the manager/leader who takes credit for his/her teams work and achievements, the manager/leader who is fearful of getting something wrong or being seen by the CEO or higher reports as not doing their job well enough. These managers and leaders are the biggest watch outs. They fear power, fear losing power and consequently reduce power in their teams and reports. If you have any new managers or leaders in your business ensure that they have the appropriate support to identify any fears and reduce the possibility of these transferring to their teams. Without this you can very quickly lose the trust, performance and wellbeing of your team.

Daring leadership – using power with, power to, and power within

Brown cites the work of Just Associates and their publication ‘making change happen: Power’. They define three variations of power that can be helpful in organisations to drive collaboration and enable people to recognise their own sources of power that supports individual and team development. Here’s the three elements of power defined:

Power with

How we find common ground among different interests to build collective strength. This is based on mutual support, solidarity, collaboration, and recognition and respect for differences, individual talents, knowledge and resources to make a larger impact.

Power to

Giving everyone on your team agency and acknowledging their unique potential. It is based on the belief that each individual has the power to make a difference, which can be multiplied by new skills, knowledge, awareness and confidence.

Power within

An ability to recognise differences and respect others, grounded in a strong foundation of self-worth and self-knowledge. When we operate from a place of power within, we feel comfortable challenging assumptions and long held beliefs, pushing against the status quo, and asking if there aren’t other ways to achieve the highest common good.

Hierarchy drives powerlessness

When we think we have a choice, can make decisions and feel we can drive actions and results we feel powerful. In layers of hierarchy where things have to be escalated constantly to a perceived higher level, we can stop feeling powerful and able to drive initiatives. The environment is command and control. But this is ineffective, and shuts down creativity, problem solving and sharing of ideas. People need to understand how their work adds value to bigger goals to drive motivation and engagement.

Daring leadership requires us to ensure everyone in the workplace is able to have an input, feel commitment, create a shared purpose and know where they can create value and have a personal role and purpose to make a difference. How do we create the space for everyone to make decisions and drive progress? It’s the responsibility of all of us who make decisions to communicate appropriately to enable others to feel strong and powerful and able to make a difference.

Giving feedback

If you need to give tough feedback, are having a regular one to one meeting, completing a perfor-mance review or listening to someone who is struggling, consider where you both sit in the room. I’ve often found that people like to sit on the other side of the desk. However, this creates a barrier and can also create a power differential. I always try to sit at a 45-degree angle with someone, this is more likely to create an open environment and if you’re idea generating it will provide a better environment for thoughts to come.

The choices we make affect our personal power

Sometimes we have to make tough choices. The time when you aren’t enjoying it at work anymore. The role isn’t fulfilling for you, perhaps you’ve been there too long. Maybe the thought of moving somewhere else is too frightening. Alternatively, maybe you are struggling at work because the job has changed or the company has moved forwards and you’re struggling to keep up. At these times, when tough conversations start, if we are really struggling, we lose all power, we are too scared to move jobs or go somewhere else. We lose our voice when we lose interest in the role or company but are too scared to move.

Sometimes to retain personal power the business has to make difficult choices

Businesses are fearful to let people go, but if they keep them and the team and individual struggles, they lose all power, and work won’t get done – power lost for the individual, their team and the company. We make choices every day. If we choose to ignore the challenges, we are offering up our power. If we choose not to take action and procrastinate or ignore it, we are ignoring our power. If we let someone in our organisation continually underperform even with consistent and long-term support then we are reducing their power and reducing the power of the organisation to succeed. Sometimes we have to make tough choices. The toughest journey can often be the kick start to a more powerful positive journey.

Women and power

A recent well-known professional organisation sent out their list of speakers for their annual event and all the top speakers were men. There followed a twitter discussion about how more women should be on speaking schedules and why this organisation had not provided some. Is it because there aren’t enough professional women around to speak, or is it because many women find it hard to present in front of others?

In ‘Women and Power’, Mary Beard shares that women since the start of time have had little voice. It is only in the 20th century that this is beginning to improve. She talks about how public speaking was not merely a thing that women didn’t do; they were exclusive practices and skills that defined masculinity as a gender. Public speaking was the defining attribute of maleness. The elite male citizen in Roman times was described as ‘a good man skilled in speaking’. A woman speaking in public was in most circumstances, not a woman. Interestingly, low-pitched voices are still seen as more authoritative than high pitched ones. (Even Margaret Thatcher learnt to speak in a lower tone when she became prime minister apparently).

Mary believes that we need to think about power differently. Removing it from public prestige. It means thinking collaboratively about the power of followers and not just leaders. It means thinking about power as an attribute rather than a possession. She defines power as ‘the ability to be effective, to make a difference in the world, and the right to be taken seriously, together as much as individually’.

Who hears you?

Do you find speaking up in meetings or when you disagree with something difficult? Is speaking up something you would like to do more of? If it is, what holds you back from doing this? Is it lack of opportunity or a lack of confidence? What would it be like if you were to feel powerful and strong to tell your story? To share something or challenge others in a way that might inspire others or add some value? Sometimes it can be the smallest idea or perspective that helps us drive something forward. In that moment we have given power to another person to get things done.

How can we increase our personal power?

When we influence people without the use of hierarchy or authority it is more likely that it will lead to commitment rather than compliance. If we draw on our personal power to influence then it is more likely to lead to healthier trusting, long term relationships. If we show up as someone that others want to be around, listen to, respect and trust then It means we’re likely to be heard and have some influence. Rebecca Newton (Forbes) shares these suggestions for ways to increase your personal power:

Be versatile

Successful leaders are those with an ability to adapt, using diverse styles in various situations with different people: being strategic at times and operationally focused at others; being enabling of those around you and at other times forceful and direct in your approach when necessary. According to research by Kaplan and Kaiser, people are 50% more likely to perceive you as a successful leader if you show adaptability. Recognition that goals can be achieved in different ways and that there is not your one way is a great example of versatility. Adapting to and allowing different styles and approaches by your team can help too.

Grow self-awareness under pressure

When you’re under pressure does it change the way you behave at all? Do retreat quietly at your desk and make it difficult for people to approach you? Do put your headphones in? Shut the door to your office? Maybe you send out lots of emails with directions and actions. Perhaps you don’t reply to emails. You might look unapproachable or become short with people. How might this have a negative impact on others? Do your actions make you think and feel more powerful and in control or are you reacting and losing strength? How might your actions impact on the personal power of others around you? Take some time to reflect on how you react and behave. Next time you’re reacting under pressure note down what you are or aren’t doing and how that might impact on those around you.

Discover strengths and what energizes other people

Your strengths and passions drive your personal power. They are the reasons you do what you do. They push you that little bit further and give meaning to why you do what you do. Do you know what your strengths are? Do you know what your purpose and passions are? Are you in a role that enables you to use both of these? When you understand your strengths and those of the people you work with you can use them to adapt the way you work with them and they will be more energised by working with you. It impacts the wider business as well. Organizations that adopt a strengths approach where people understand their own and others strengths and build on these can increase personal power by 70%.

Be able to say no

I’m adding another simple one here. It’s the ability to say no appropriately. Often when we know our strengths and passions we can often see so many opportunities for positive change, growth or development in our work. We want the best results for ourselves and the business. However, the danger then is we commit to too much, delegate too much to people, and try to do too much and deliver some, not all of our best work. Saying no is personal power, it’s ensuring we have the right balance. Without the ability to say no we can become frustrated and it can impact on our perceptions of others and our relationships with others. We become compliant not committed. It can impact on business performance and potential for growth. Saying no at times with a clear rationale where really needed can enable us to have control over our lives, clarify what is important and have a clear focus on what we’re committed to and can be achieved. It drives our positive personal wellbeing and of those we work with.

How will you ignite your personal power?

So, what does power mean to you? When are the times you feel powerful, and do you have enough of them? How might you create more of them? Do you need to have tough conversations with yourselves and others to realign your power?

If you are a leader in an organisation, do you feel powerful? Does it drive positive behaviours in you? Are you creating the right environment for your people through leadership and values to drive personal power and success? What change might you make?

Remember; you have all the power you need when you arrive at work each morning. It’s up to you to choose how to use it.

‘Power properly understood is nothing but the ability to achieve purpose… and to bring about change’ Martin Luther King Jr.

Originally published at www.thechangeconnection.co.uk on 30 January 2019