The Power of No
Stephanie Alexander
Partner & Co-Founder, govmates | CEO & Founder, BOOST Create & Implement Intentional Ecosystems for Business Growth
After what can only be described as a waffling phone call last week with a potential client, it made me want to issue this PSA: Saying “no” to an opportunity, a service, a contract, a teammate, or even a prospective employee, is one of the best gifts you can give.
When you concretely say “no,” you are valuing the other person’s time and energy. Whether that’s during recruiting, contract negotiation, or anything in between, it’s the right thing to do. They no longer have to put you on the follow up list, they no longer will spend mental energy trying to figure out where they stand in the process.?They are empowered to move on and spend their energy on other opportunities.?THIS IS A GIFT to all parties.?
Too many times people are scared to commit to an answer.?They are scared of losing out, so they drag out the relationship and suck up energy and effort on both sides.?They don’t want to hurt the other party's feelings. They don’t want to own their decision. They don’t want to address their answer.?But what they fail to recognize is that this is a mental drain on themselves.
The best answer you can give anyone requesting something or a candidate during recruiting is “Yes.”?The second best answer is “No.”?Ambiguity or playing out the answers until you are 100% sure is a mental suck.??
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Embrace making a decision.?Embrace follow up and providing a solid “Yes (or ‘no’ if applicable), or follow up with me in XX months.”
On another note, if the party who was told no asks for any feedback, most of the time it’s not because they want to change your mind (although that absolutely does happen on occasion).?If they are like me, they just want to know where they could do better.?What about our proposal didn’t resonate, what didn’t hit right with you??It’s no different than asking for a debrief after putting blood, sweat and tears into an RFP response and losing.?Providing just 5 mins worth of feedback is incredibly helpful and allows that person to grow.?And isn’t that what we all want?
If you’ve just had it with recruiting, negotiating contracts, or any of the back-office work that comes along with operating within the world of GovCons, that’s totally okay. Sometimes the idea of having to deal with all your yes-or-no obligations is exhausting in itself.?
At BOOST, that’s what we do. We make operating your GovCon business that much easier by handling those things for you. Whether it’s HR, accounting, contracts or recruiting, we’ve got you covered.?
Author of eight books (most now free Flipbooks at BooksbyMike.org) including How to Win in the Gov't Market 2nd Edition (w/Mark Amtower) & Romancing the Buddha (4th Edition)
2 年So pleased to read your post. Saying No is one of the most difficult challenges for managers. Here’s another area that can benefit from an immediate No (or in some cases, a Yes!) https://washingtontechnology.com/opinion/2022/04/know-how-say-no-bad-bids/363988/
According and Consulting
2 年Amen!
Accomplished Business Advising Professional | Federal Contracting Expert | Procurement Leader | Project Manager | Startup Advisor | investor in real estate, stocks, and businesses. These views represented are my own.
2 年So true. Give people an answer so they can move on and refocus their energy.
Federal Sales Guide/Senior Executive who Builds Industry Intel & Customized Winning Federal Sales Action Plans for Contractors through her ‘Three-Step Program.’ Over 10,000 people and 350 companies trained since 2002.
2 年AMEN!
Level Up Your Federal Business Starting Now: Discover And Build The Relationships You Need In The Agencies That Need You. Custom Programs, Training, Keynotes for Companies & Cohorts. Learn more: Call me at 703 627 1074.
2 年Stephanie Alexander I love this article. people often put off or even just disappear from a follow up call instead of saying, “no, thank you,”and I’m sad to imagine all the frustrating or pushy sales conversations they must have experienced in order to feel that somehow I was going to twist their arm if they followed up with me. One of the constant themes that comes up in sales coaching is the idea that “if it’s not a hell yes, then it’s a hell no.“ I don’t entirely agree with that part. I like the idea that no means to things. Mostly it means not now, in the vast majority of cases. I have customers now that I followed up with for 10 years. Now you can decide that I wasted my profit margin in 10 years of conversations, but I am absolutely convinced that if I had done business with those folks when I first met them, I would not have been able to serve them nearly as well. I love the gracious conversation that one of my clients, Elaina yearly, had with one of her federal contracting officers after she submitted an unsuccessful proposal. She called up the contracting officer to offer her congratulations. That’s right! She congratulated the contracting officer for choosing the vendor that they knew was right for them.