The Power of Self Kindness: Why being kind to yourself makes you a better leader

Hi Beautiful Humans!

Thankyou SO much for joining me, I'm so happy you're here. I am thrilled you are wanting more kindness in your life and at work!

I have a question for you...

When was the last time you showed yourself some kindness?

As leaders, we often prioritise our teams, clients, and deadlines over our own wellbeing. But here's a thought: what if the key to becoming a more effective, inspiring leader lies in how kind you are to yourself?

Self kindness is about treating yourself with the same compassion and understanding you’d extend to a colleague or friend. And in today’s high-pressure world, it’s a leadership skill we can no longer afford to overlook.

Why Self-Kindness Matters for Leaders

I've worked in the Corporate Leadership space as an HR Leader and Consultant for nearly 2 decades and I know that being a leader is tough. You’re expected to make decisions, motivate others, and maintain composure even in the most challenging situations. It’s easy to fall into the trap of being overly critical of yourself, pushing through stress, and ignoring your own needs. But self kindness can have a profound impact on your leadership abilities.

Here’s why:

1. Improved Decision-Making: When you’re kind to yourself, you create mental space to think more clearly. Self compassion reduces stress and anxiety, allowing you to approach decisions with a calm, rational mindset. Instead of getting stuck in self doubt, you can focus on what truly matters: leading your team effectively.
2. Resilience in the Face of Challenges: Every leader faces setbacks. What sets great leaders apart is how they handle those setbacks. Self kindness helps you bounce back faster. By acknowledging that mistakes are part of growth, you can recover more quickly and keep moving forward without being weighed down by guilt or frustration.
3. Stronger Relationships with Your Team: When you’re kind to yourself, you’re more likely to extend that kindness to others. Leaders who practice self compassion are better at empathising with their team, fostering a positive and supportive work environment. Your team will feel more valued and motivated, knowing that their leader understands the importance of wellbeing.
4. Sustainable Leadership: Burnout is real, and it’s a threat to any leader’s long term success. Self kindness is a powerful antidote to burnout. By prioritising your own wellbeing, you ensure that you have the energy and enthusiasm to lead for the long haul. It’s not about being selfish; it’s about recognising that you can’t pour from an empty cup.

How to Practice Self Kindness as a Leader

So, how can you start incorporating self kindness into your leadership style? Here are a few practical tips:

1. Challenge Your Inner Critic: Pay attention to your self talk. When you catch yourself being overly critical, ask yourself if you’d say the same things to a friend. Replace harsh judgments with more supportive and constructive thoughts.
2. Set Realistic Expectations: It’s easy to set the bar impossibly high, but this only leads to stress and disappointment. Give yourself permission to be human. Set achievable goals, and celebrate your progress along the way.
3. Take Breaks Without Guilt: Rest is not a luxury; it’s a necessity. Allow yourself to take breaks, recharge, and come back stronger. Whether it’s a short walk, a mindful moment, or a longer vacation, give yourself the space to unwind.
4. Ask for Help: Leaders often feel the pressure to have all the answers, but no one expects you to do it all alone. Asking for help is a sign of strength, not weakness. Lean on your team, colleagues, or mentors when you need support.
5. Reflect and Reset: Regularly take time to reflect on your leadership journey. What’s working? What’s not? Use these reflections as opportunities to reset and realign with your values and goals.

Final Thoughts: Self Kindness Is a Leadership Strength

Incorporating self kindness into your leadership doesn’t just benefit you – it benefits your entire team and organisation. When you lead with compassion, both for yourself and others, you create an environment where everyone can thrive.

So, next time you’re tempted to push through another late night or beat yourself up over a mistake, take a step back. Show yourself some kindness. After all, the best leaders aren’t the ones who never falter – they’re the ones who know how to pick themselves back up with grace and compassion.

Ready to make self kindness a part of your leadership journey? Start today by taking a small step towards treating yourself with the kindness you deserve.

Maybe start by picking a book from these ones that I love (I don't receive any kickback and they haven't asked me to share - I genuinely love them!) :

Be Your Own Leadership Coach - Karen Stein

Self Compassion - Self-Compassion by Kristin Neff, Ph.D.

Dare to Lead - Brené Brown

Have the most wonderful, kind month ahead and see you here again in September.

Until next time, be kind to yourself.

Kindest

Soph #thekindnessmentor

Oh and for those who might be interested, here is a link to my FREE Insight Timer meditations - enjoy a few minutes for yourself Meditations to make your heart smile :)

Want someone who loves kindness, connection and humans at your next event? Pick me!

I'd love the opportunity to chat with you to discuss how, together, we can build more connection to others and ourselves as well as to supporting a more mentally healthy world.

As a speaker, I am available for conferences, panel discussions and events, online or in person on the topics of Self Kindness, Workplace Wellbeing from a Holistic Perspective (think mental, emotional and physical connection with nature therapy thrown in!), HR and Organisational Design for Wellbeing, Learning and Development for Engagement, Mental Health for Leaders.

Find my Metta Leaders Account on Metta Leaders Instagram

Or have a look at my website for more information Metta Leaders Website