The Power of Reflection: How to Learn from Your Leadership Experiences

When was the last time you properly stopped to reflect on your leadership? And I don't mean a quick mental replay of your last difficult conversation or team meeting while you're driving home. I mean actually taking time to think about what's working, what isn't and what you're learning from your experiences.

If you're anything like most of my coaching clients, you probably think you don't have time. After all, there are decisions to be made, problems to solve and your diary is back to back meetings. Your to do list definitely doesn't have 'sit and think' on it anywhere.?

Yet reflection is one of the most powerful (and underused) tools to develop yourself as a leader. Research from Harvard Business School found that professionals who spent just 15 minutes at the end of their day reflecting on lessons learned performed 23% better after 10 days than those who kept working without reflection.?

Even as a staunch advocate for taking time to reflect I did a double take when I read that stat. A 23% improvement in performance from an hour and a quarter spent in reflection each week. If someone offered you that kind of return on investment you'd bite their hand off.?

And yet when it comes to actually doing it, most leaders are stuck in a pattern of having convinced themselves they can't afford to take the time for reflection because they are too busy getting things done. I certainly used to operate in that way.?

There’s an emotional attachment to getting things ticked off and working hard that FEELS like it needs to be done first. Yet by constantly driving forward without pausing, you're probably working harder than you need to. Doing things because of habit rather than logic, missing opportunities to do things differently, and potentially making the same mistakes in slightly different ways.

Why Reflection Matters for Leaders

The performance boost that HBR found is just the headline. What’s really powerful is digging into the detail of how using reflection strategically can help you gain insights that change how you lead.

Think about the leaders you most respect. Are they the one constantly firefighting or rushing from one thing to the next? Nope. Didn’t think so. They're much more likely to be the ones who seem to have clarity about what matters. The ones who spot opportunities others miss. The ones who've developed a leadership approach that gives space and time for them to commit time to their people.

That kind of leadership doesn't come from constantly doing. It comes from understanding what works, what doesn't, and why. When you take time to reflect, you increase the quality of your thinking. You spot patterns and notice things that are worth giving your attention to.??

Maybe you spot that pushing for quick consensus is masking a lack of real buy in. Or that your involvement in operational details is holding your team back from stepping up. Or that resistance to change is actually showing you where stakeholder relationships need investment. And once you notice those things, reflection and thinking time allows you to solve them.?

Without reflection, you end up operating on autopilot, dealing with what's in front of you rather than what's most important. And while you might be getting stuff done, you're missing chances to work smarter not harder.

Reflection also builds your emotional intelligence as a leader. It helps you understand your impact on others - both when things go well and when they don't. You start to recognise what motivates different team members, what situations trigger stress or conflict, and how to adapt your approach accordingly. You get better at predicting emotional responses and reactions and you can contingency plan for them.?

Over time, that kind of self-awareness and ability to deliver is gold dust when it comes to developing your leadership career. It helps you build a personal brand as someone who’s measured, commercial, strategic (and all the other over buzzwords) associated with getting promoted. It also gives you great? evidence of your leadership impact.?

Why Reflection Feels Hard

Most leaders intellectually "get" that reflection matters, there's just a gap between knowing something matters and actually doing it. And it's not just about being busy - though that's certainly part of it.

In so many businesses, and therefore in so many leaders' subconscious, there's an underlying belief that pace equals progress. That good leaders are quick thinkers, decisive and able to come up with answers on the spot. Taking time to think can feel indulgent when there are commercial pressures, team challenges and operational issues all competing for your attention. Addressing those things feels like progress whereas sitting and thinking feels like wasting time.?

And when businesses pride themselves on being action-oriented, decisive and nimble, there can be an unspoken assumption that reflection means slow decision making or analysis paralysis. Nobody wants to be seen as the leader who thinks too much and acts too little.

Add to that the vulnerability factor. Real reflection means being honest with yourself about what's working and what isn't. About where you might have got it wrong or where you need to develop. That's not always comfortable territory, especially when you feel like you should have all the answers and you’re desperate to prove yourself. .

The result of all of this is that even leaders who value reflection don’t always prioritise it. They promise themselves they’ll just get through this pinch point and then make time for it in the future. And that time rarely comes.

Making Reflection Work in Practice

The key to making reflection valuable isn't finding huge chunks of time or having deep philosophical moments. It's about being intentional about what you reflect on and why.

The highest value reflection tends to focus on three key areas:

Strategic Patterns: What themes keep coming up? Where are you spending most of your energy? What's the gap between where you focus and where you add most value?

Leadership Impact: How are your actions and decisions working to create the impact you want to have? Where's your leadership approach working or not working? What assumptions are you making about what good leadership looks like?

Future Direction: What's coming down the line that needs deeper thinking? Where might quick decisions now create problems later? What future opportunities are you missing because you're stuck in the operational?

Building the Reflection Habit

The most effective approach I've found with clients is to combine different types of reflection. A quick weekly check-in keeps you honest about what's happening, while a deeper reflection creates space for real insight.

Weekly reflection can be as simple as a notebook, a cuppa. 15 minutes and three questions:

• What's gone well this week?
• What have I learned or been reminded of?
• What needs more of my thinking time and attention?

Having the same questions each week makes it easier to build the habit. And you'll start to notice patterns that are worth exploring further.?

Then block an hour each month specifically for leadership reflection. This is your chance to properly explore what's working and what isn't about how you’re operating in your role. Capture positive examples of your leadership impact - they will be invaluable when you come to prepare for your annual review. And dig into the root causes of your challenges rather than just firefighting the symptoms.

You might also need specific reflection time for particular projects or challenges. For example, thinking back over your last few team meetings to understand how to make them more effective. Or exploring why a particular stakeholder relationship isn't working as well as you'd like.

By its nature, reflection is harder to do alone. One of the biggest benefits clients get from coaching is the time to pause and reflect amongst their busy leadership role. Having someone to help you dig deeper and challenge your thinking often surfaces insights you wouldn't get to on your own. If you don’t have a coach, consider whether there’s someone you could meet with once a month who can be a thinking partner so you can both take time for reflection.

Want to Think Better, Lead Better?

The evidence for reflection as a performance and leadership tool is clear. But like any skill, it takes practice and often benefits from support.

If you'd like help making reflection work for you - whether that's getting underneath a specific leadership challenge or building reflection into your routine - I can help. You can book a one off power hour or explore ongoing coaching support with an initial chat.