THE POWER OF PURPOSE

When I came across the upheaval the word “purpose” was causing, my curious mind could not help but research facts and findings about this phenomenon. I landed on the following:

?A 2019 study published in?JAMA Network Open?found that individuals with a strong sense of purpose had a significantly lower risk of depression and anxiety. Purpose acts as a buffer against life’s challenges, and helps you keep going even when circumstances feel overwhelming.

?Research from the?University of Michigan?revealed that people with a high sense of purpose are more likely to engage in healthy behaviors, such as regular exercise and a balanced diet. A 2014 study in?Psychological Science?found that individuals with a strong sense of purpose had a 15% lower risk of death compared to those who felt aimless. Purpose, therefore, is good for the soul and the body.

?A 2017 study in?The Journal of Positive Psychology?highlighted that individuals with a clear sense of purpose can better cope with trauma and adversity. Purpose provides a framework for understanding suffering and finding meaning in the midst of pain.

?The research pointed to everything I wanted to achieve in my work as a coach, so I decided to use the title “Purpose Coach”, but to be honest I didn’t quite understand the true meaning of purpose until a few months ago.

?For those who have known me for a while, you know I started off as an equity trader, later a corporate consultant, moving on to become a business owner and finally a coach, which I called (and still do) my true calling. Even before I started my college degree, I had a profound interest in psychology and human behavior. However, there was no google or ChatGPT at that time, and it was hard to research what the study of psychology actually entailed. Moreover, as a young adult craving for financial independence, what career paths would open up for me and how would I earn a living.

?I asked myself so many existential questions as a young and unexperienced individual, only to settle for what my family thought was best for me and, let’s be real here, for the easiest fuss-free option. Fast forward 25 years (and I just gave away my age!), as life has it, I did my Level 2 coach training and certified as an ICF PCC. I thought to myself, this is my purpose: to help people find meaning in what they do, to align their actions to their values and the person they are, and to live truly fulfilling and authentic lives. Yes, this is it, but the immense power of purpose was completely unknown to me until recently.

?I lost my Mum in July 2023, after a long and painful battle with cancer she left us to rest in peace. It was a loss I thought I would never recover from; grief broke me in ways I had never imagined. I forgot about the person that I am and decided to simply breathe, eat and sleep for as long as my mind and body needed. A long time essentially.

I came back; slowly, taking one step at a time with a huge support system watching my every move, falling back every now and then, but keeping my vision of my future self very present at all times. Gradually I recovered my will to do things, to have conversations, to help. I recovered my purpose. Within the emptiness that I now know will never be filled, I was starting to be myself again, and thankful for all the opportunities coming my way.

?December 2024, I lost my Dad. It was not after a long illness or a harsh battle, he just left, with so many things left to do and so many words unsaid. Another hard blow. It didn’t break me this time, it just made me question everything under the sky. Is this the way the universe works? What kind of circle of life is this? Was I angry? Perhaps, though I believe it was indifference that took over me. I had lost meaning; I had lost my purpose. I went back to my breathe, eat, sleep cycle, though this time without a clear future vision, without a plan.

?Roughly a month into my seemingly indifferent existence, a new client booking came through. This was part of an overseas project I am part of and my professional ethics as well my conscious did not allow me to cancel the session. I turned up to the best of my ability, scared and hugely doubting my capabilities, and honestly hoping to get it over and done with as soon as possible. After all, what good could I be to anyone right now? That whole hour, I listened, I was present, I was curious, and not for one minute did it cross my mind to divert my attention to anything else. It was a good session, great actually. The client came up with actionable takeaways, and more importantly, I realized the immense power of purpose. I was doing what I am best at, what gives me meaning and what motivates me to keep getting better. I needed nothing else to pull through, I just had to remind myself of who I am and why I do what I do.

?The road ahead is still a little bumpy, I know I am likely to trip every now and then; but my anchor is strong, holding me up and leading me forward. My anchor is my purpose. A few lessons I have learnt, and keep learning along the way:

·????? Don’t be scared to do the hard thing: it’s probably what you value the most and will help you find yourself again.

·????? When you are ready, try to think beyond yourself and the impact you have had. This will motivate you to keep going, or start again.

·????? One small step at a time: it’s a process, take it slow and steady and remember to celebrate everything you achieve along the way. Any dopamine boost is more than welcome.

·????? Don’t be afraid to be in between, that stage in which you know something has to change but you don’t know how or you don’t have the energy. Take it slow, it will come to you.

·????? Be patient: situations, feelings and emotions need their time to be processed. Take that time, listen to yourself and to what you need at any given time.

·????? Surround yourself by people that will cheer you on when you need it, hold you when you are about to fall and will be there even if you push them away. Keep those people close.

?I quote Viktor Frankl in?Man’s Search for Meaning: “Those who have a 'why' to live can bear with almost any 'how.'”? When I found my purpose, I found myself, and in myself I found the resilience and the strength to rise, no matter how deep I had fallen.

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References:

• Kim, E. S., et al. (2019).?JAMA Network Open.
• Hill, P. L., & Turiano, N. A. (2014).?Psychological Science.
• Schaefer, S. M., et al. (2017).?The Journal of Positive Psychology.
• Frankl, V. E. (1946).?Man’s Search for Meaning.