The Power of "No"
Welcome back or welcome to the 6 Degrees Newsletter.?The newsletter that helps people like me get connected to their next job. Please comment, like, share and subscribe to help jobseekers you may know.?
And if you really like this, I need your help to land that Sr. Ops Director or Chief of Staff position. If you know someone help me make a connection, [email protected]
Why values are important to maximizing your Return on Minute (RoM)
You’re sitting in a meeting, a meeting that you are not looking forward to. Durning the meeting the leader drones on. People quietly begin responding to emails, answering texts, or are otherwise disengaged. After the meeting, you come out thinking that was a huge waste of time.
Alternatively, you can’t wait to get to your next meeting.?It’s a topic that you are extremely interested in.?The people in the room are highly engaged and contribute to the conversation. After the meeting, the next steps are clear, and folks are energized to come back together to share their input.?
We’ve all been in these types of situations. In the first example, you are not getting any value from the meeting.?Why? It conflicts with your core values.
The second meeting energizes you likely because it aligns with your values.
Values give you the power to say "no" and the freedom to say "yes" to the things that fuel you. By understanding your core values, you are able to discern more clearly how and where you spend your time. The value you get from each interaction is inextricably linked to your core values whether you know them or not.
What are Values?
Values “are the principles that give our lives meaning and allow us to persevere through adversity,” according to psychologist Barb Markway and Celia Ampel in?The?Self-Confidence?Workbook.?In other words, values stand for our most meaningful ideals as well as guide us when the going gets tough.
Find your values.
Your values aren’t hiding. Even if you haven’t vocalized them, they’re interwoven into the most important aspects of your life.?I used to say, "show me your calendar and I'll show you what you value" because we put our time (in addition to money) into the activities that we value and get the most benefit from.
There are several approaches to uncovering your values, I particularly like this approach I developed because rather than looking at a list and picking what you think might be the “right” answers, you use the information of your calendar to guide you in a non-judgmental objective way. That said, this exercise will only help you if you’re 100% honest with yourself.
Step 1
Look at the last three months of your calendar. Go through every activity very quickly (1-2 seconds) and put a check mark next to the meetings/events that you enjoyed and an ‘x’ next to the activities that you would not want to do again or give you a sinking feeling.
Step 2
Go back to each of those activities with a check mark and ask yourself why you enjoyed the meeting/event.?What was it that brought you energy? Maybe the group was talking about a new product so “Innovation” or “Creativity” might be one of your values.?
Then do the same on the ‘x’ meetings.?Maybe the meeting/event was conflicting with a friend or family engagement in which case “Family” or “Connection” might be your value.?
Again, don’t spend more than a minute on each interaction.?The goal here is to create a list of words. If you struggle to find the right words, I’ve provided several links to values lists below.
Step 3
Now look at your list. What words come up for you over and over again? What patterns do you see of common words??I sometimes find it help to do word mapping or grouping of similar words.
Try to keep the groups to a manageable size of 3-5. Note that, not all words have to fit into a bucket, but those that do, identify your core values in some way.
For example, you might have a bucket of words that includes empowerment, opportunity, and self-expression.?These are often associated with “freedom.” Does that ring true for you? If so, write it down.
Step 4
Using this same example, now look at “freedom” and consider how you would define it for yourself in 1-2 short sentences.?For example, it could be defined as:
There is no right or wrong answer here.?It is important to leave the critic behind and write what you find rings true for you and only you.
Values in Action
This is where you’ll really start to see the power of knowing your values. It simplifies decisions and actions. It can give you courage when you think you don’t have it. It can guide you and provide you with valuable insights.
If one of your values is “freedom,” that can help you make decisions regarding your career. If you get offered a fully remote job, that may be more exciting to you than one that is hybrid or fully in-person. Or if you’re wondering if you should quit your job that has poor work-life balance, you can do so confidently knowing it would give you more time to explore your other interests.
Don’t expect to get clear on your values in one day. Be patient, practice, and notice when you have to make a decision what comes up for you??Is it excitement or dread? Why? What’s driving that – could it be a values conflict – and what can you do to stay more in the excitement column vs. dread.
Although it's hard to believe, knowing your core values can help you reduce stress, communicate with more honesty, and derive more value out of every precious minute.?
领英推荐
Dive Deeper
What's cheaper than your next Starbucks?
Becoming a member of the Return on Minute community. Subscribe to?Return On Minute?today to get the latest know-how to create a happier, more meaningful life through intentional, thoughtful, and purpose-driven time investment.
Let’s Dig In: New Jobs to check out
Thank you to everyone who posted these. Please keep them coming. Or comment below if you know of more opportunities.
Remote/Virtual Job Boards
Social impact?&?international development Job boards
Learning Library
What I'm reading
Two books to keep my skills sharp and one just for fun. You decide which is which.
If you see something say something
I still need your help to land that?Sr. Ops Director or Chief of Staff?position.?If you know someone?in one of the companies below, help me make a connection. Or if you have another cool opportunity, let's talk directly, [email protected].
Non-profit
Travel
What's taking so long?
You've read this far, might as well subscribe to?Return On Minute?today.