The Power of Maybe, Conquering Ourselves & Having Courage

Hello my friend,

This week I’m leading with another anecdote.

One that is certainly relevant in this season of my life.

I first read The Story of the Chinese Farmer a couple of years ago and it immediately resonated with me.

I needed it again this past week.

It’s unbelievable the amount of mental freedom it can serve and the amount of anxiety it can suppress.

We like to concern ourselves with future implications.

We seek meaning in each event, situation or circumstance.

We label them.

“This is good.” “This is bad.”

What if we could let this go?

What if whenever something happens to us we can be more neutral towards it?

Without making wild assumptions or conclusions.

Not fixating or getting caught up in all the potential implications.

The Story of the Chinese Farmer

Once upon a time there was a Chinese farmer whose horse ran away. That evening, all of his neighbors came around to commiserate. They said, “We are so sorry to hear your horse has run away. This is most unfortunate.” The farmer said, “Maybe.”

The next day the horse came back bringing seven wild horses with it, and in the evening everybody came back and said, “Oh, isn’t that lucky. What a great turn of events. You now have eight horses!” The farmer again said, “Maybe.”

The following day his son tried to train one of the horses, and while riding it, he was thrown off and broke his leg. The neighbors then said, “Oh dear, that’s too bad,” and the farmer responded, “Maybe.”

The next day the conscription officers came around to conscript people into the army, and they rejected his son because he had a broken leg. Again all the neighbors came around and said, “Isn’t that great!” Again, he said, “Maybe.”

The whole process of nature is an integrated process of immense complexity, and it’s really impossible to tell whether anything that happens in it is good or bad - because you never know what will be the consequence of the misfortune; or, you never know what will be the consequences of good fortune.

- Alan Watts

Think back for a moment.

Revisit some of your hardest moments.

In hindsight did they actually serve a purpose?

Were you actually better off?

Many of them may have felt disatrious in the moment.

Looking back at many of my own I’m so thankful they went the way they did.

The stress and worry I put myself through and that I could have saved.

This is not to say that certain situations and events are not worth concerning ourselves over.

Planning and thinking ahead towards potential consequences is absolutely necessary at times.

But it’s about having a wider perspective.

Knowing that the worst may indeed turn out to be the best.

Or at least not nearly as bad as we might think.

We just cannot know.

This can be life-changing in respect to the way we view and respond to various situations.

We can learn to accept what is.

Things I’m learning

A few short quotes I’m pondering this week.

One person’s bad is another’s good.

"There is nothing either good or bad but thinking makes it so” - William Shakespeare

Changing you changes the world.

“Conquer yourself rather than the world.” - Rene Descartes

Anything worth doing takes courage.

“Without courage we cannot practice any other virtue with consistency. We can’t be kind, true, merciful, generous, or honest.” - Maya Angelou

Question

Where are you lacking courage right now?

Life Hack

Call a friend. Not a hack as such but it’s still massively undervalued. Whenever we face a challenge, setback, milestone or a victory pick up the phone. It makes everything lighter or everything sweeter.

That’s all for this week.

Thank you as ever for reading - I really appreciate you being here.

With love. Nick x

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