The power of just asking.

Asking for things.

Some are born with this skill.

For others, it's like a muscle that needs training to be perfected.?

When I was younger, asking was hard.?

Asking to stay out late, borrow money, help with schoolwork, and in particular asking for a date were all mind-numbingly?brutal.?

As I started to work professionally, it got harder. Asking for a raise, a promotion, to work on a cool project, or just asking for help on an assignment were all tough.?

Why??Simple.?

Fear.?

Fear of failure.

Fear of rejection.

Fear of embarrassment.?

In colloquial terms:?

"What if I completely screw this up?"?

"What if they say get outta here?"

"What if she says no? I don't think I could handle that kind of rejection." (thanks George McFly)

But you know what? Apart from a little ribbing that all school-aged kids got - most of my fears were completely unwarranted. Like not even that faintest element of those fears even remotely came true.?

Of course, it's taken many years of trial, but bit by bit, that muscle became stronger.?And no, I didn't take performance-enhancing drugs.?

I?just got better at it mostly because my fears were losing their grip on me and I got more confident.

And people just responded?favourably all the time, like:?

-"Sure, what do you need?"

-"I don't know, but I know someone who might"

-And of course: "I can't really help, Dave, but thanks for asking".?

Of course a "no" will happen, but they're just polite and not soul-crushing.

Because when it comes down to it, done subtly, people like to be asked. As long as you're direct, relevant, and respectful of their time.?They love to share their thoughts.

Fast forward to my first 6 weeks at my new firm, M&H (not counting the one week of COVID - I didn't ask for that).?

It's been fantastic - the talent, the expertise, the passion, they're on another level.?

But what did I actually do in those 6 weeks? Funny you should ask.

I've done a lot of asking.?

Asking of my network for some help.

Help in validating our value proposition.?

Help in providing feedback on our brand.?

Help with introductions that might be useful.?

Or just talking about them, and seeing if I could help.?

In short, just asking for some of their time.?

And you know what - the response has been incredible - they all said yes.

I've confirmed a few ideas, pivoted on a few others, and it's gotten things to a better place. It's been fantastic and I've learned so much from some of the folks in my network.?

As usual, I'm overwhelmed with?gratitude (you all know who you are).?

It all started with asking and honestly it wasn't that hard.?

So, take it from someone who has been there.?

Asking is one of the most powerful skills you can develop, and it'll pay off for you in the long run.?

A few tips I've learned as you start asking:?

1) Know what you're asking for, be sure you've got something legit that needs answering.

2) Research your audience, know what you're asking is in their wheelhouse.

3) Pay it forward, after you're done, make sure you ask what you can do for them.?

Think it'll work for you?? Yes, I do.?

Thanks for asking.?