The Power of Gratitude

The "Thank you" was one of the first arts that I learned. My mother instilled it within me early and kept the tags with all my gifts to make sure I wrote notes to everyone who had thought of me. While she wanted it to be instinctive to me, she didn't want it to sound mechanical. She encouraged me to connect my gratitude to how it made me feel as I wrote those notes and to share that emotion. She told me to be genuine. I asked her what to say when I didn't like the gift (think Christmas Story) or when say, I was given pierced earrings and couldn't wear them.  I was hoping her response to the latter was that she'd take me to get my ears pierced and I could write to my grandmother about how her gift triggered such a joyous event, but she told me to remember that someone had taken time to think of me. She taught me about the value of someone's time and how even the money used to purchase gifts meant time and how important it is to acknowledge that. 

I remember the first "Thank You" note I received personally. It wasn't written to my family with my name added - it was just to me from my grandmother and it recognized the time and thought I put into making a box out of popsicle sticks for her at summer camp. I felt valued and appreciated. I felt like I made someone feel special. It made me want to make others feel that way and gave inspiration for the notes I would craft during my life.

Somewhere in somewhat recent history, the art of "Thank You" seems to be taught less and less. At Christmas, cheapened blanket statements are now made by parents, stating "I am not sure who gave what, but thanks". The lessons are not being passed. While this seems to the new norm,  I still yearn for the recognition that my thought mattered. Did they like the wedding gift I spent weeks at antique shops trying to find? Did she notice the scarf perfectly matched her favorite shirt? Did he get the money I sent for graduation?  So when a "Thank You" does happen, it is all the more meaningful.

A compliment or a "Thank You can change the course of someone's day - particularly when they are used to hearing complaints. I received one earlier today and it put a smile on my face. I saw this on a meme and it's true - "A person who feels appreciated will do more than what is expected". In business, that makes it a powerful tool.

For many years, I've worked hard to improve situations with colleagues, employees and vendors. Sometimes that involves a lot of constructive criticism that is hard to listen to and I've made it a regular practice to provide balance and recognize efforts. It has a valuable pay off in building relationships and it feels good! I get "Thank You" messages in response to my "Thank You" messages because it brought a meaningful interruption to their day, often right when they needed it. I am often told that people rarely understand the efforts and care they put into achieving a solution - how true.  Our relationships absolutely improve as we continue to build trust and recognition with each other in a way that demonstrates that we are human and our time is given and appreciated.

I would like to see the return of gratitude making an extraordinary comeback. I would like to return to the time where we understood that someone's time had meaning and value. I challenge everyone to find one individual to recognize and thank this week.