The Power of Focusing on What You Can Control and Influence

In my years of coaching senior executives, one recurring theme I encounter is the frustration many feel about their work environment. They often vent about difficult bosses, uncooperative colleagues, or systemic challenges beyond their reach. While these frustrations are valid, they usually highlight a deeper issue: too much focus on the?Sphere of Concern—things outside their control—and not enough on what they can?control?or?influence. This concept, popularized by Stephen Covey in?The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, has been a cornerstone of my coaching practice. It’s a simple yet transformative framework that helps leaders refocus their energy on areas where they can make a real difference.

Understanding the Three Spheres

1. Sphere of Control: This is the smallest but most impactful sphere, encompassing what you can directly manage—your actions, decisions, and mindset.
2. Sphere of Influence: This includes areas where you can shape outcomes indirectly through relationships, persuasion, or collaboration.
3. Sphere of Concern: The largest sphere includes everything you care about but cannot control or influence, such as other people’s behavior, organizational politics, or broader economic conditions.

The key to effective leadership—and personal well-being—is to focus your time and energy on the first two spheres while minimizing attention to the third.

Real-Life Coaching Examples

In one coaching session, a senior executive spent significant time lamenting their boss’s erratic behavior and how it disrupted team morale. They felt powerless and stuck in a cycle of frustration. Upon deeper reflection, it became clear that their focus was entirely on their boss’s actions—firmly within the?Sphere of Concern. Together, we identified actionable steps within their?Sphere of Control?and?Influence. For example:

• Control: They could manage their own reactions to the boss’s behavior by practicing emotional regulation and maintaining professionalism.
• Influence: They could build stronger relationships with peers and higher-ups to create a support network and advocate for more precise communication channels.

By shifting focus from frustration to action, this executive reduced stress and enhanced their credibility as leaders who could navigate challenging situations. In another instance, a client was preoccupied with a colleague’s perceived lack of effort on a shared project. This led to resentment and unproductive meetings. We explored what was within their control:

• They could clarify expectations for deliverables in writing.
• They could influence the colleague by offering support or finding common ground to align goals.

Instead of waiting for the colleague to change—a hope firmly rooted in the?Sphere of Concern—the client took proactive steps that improved collaboration and outcomes.

Why Leaders Get Stuck in the Sphere of Concern

It’s easy to fall into the trap of focusing on external problems because it feels like venting provides relief. However, this mindset often leads to:

• Burnout: Worrying about things you can’t change drains energy without producing results.
• Victim Mentality: Feeling powerless can erode confidence and agency.
• Missed Opportunities: Time spent on concerns is time not spent on actionable solutions.

Research shows that focusing on what you can control builds resilience and enhances well-being. Leaders who adopt this mindset are better equipped to handle challenges effectively.

Practical Strategies for Refocusing

Here’s how you can apply this framework in your leadership journey:

1. Identify Your Stressors: Write down what’s bothering you. Categorize each item into Control, Influence, or Concern.
2. Act Within Your Sphere of Control: Focus on your actions—how you respond to challenges, communicate with others, and prioritize tasks. For example, if team deadlines are slipping due to external factors, adjust timelines or redistribute workloads rather than dwelling on delays.
3. Expand Your Sphere of Influence: Build trust with stakeholders through consistent communication. Advocate for changes that align with shared goals.
4. Let Go of the Sphere of Concern: Acknowledge what you cannot change and consciously redirect your energy toward actionable areas. For instance, instead of fixing market conditions, focus on strategies your team can implement to adapt.

The Transformational Impact

When leaders shift their focus from concerns to control and influence:

• They feel more empowered and less stressed.
• Their teams benefit from clearer direction and more decisive leadership.
• They achieve better results by channeling energy into productive actions.

One client who embraced this approach reported feeling “liberated” after letting go of frustrations about organizational politics. By building relationships within their sphere of influence, they successfully secured buy-in for a significant initiative—something they had previously thought impossible.

A Final Thought

As leaders, it’s natural to care deeply about your team’s success, organizational culture, and global trends. But caring doesn’t mean controlling. The most effective leaders recognize that their power lies in focusing on what they can do today to create a better tomorrow. If you are overwhelmed by frustrations or anxieties at work, step back and ask:?Am I focusing on what I can control or influence??This simple shift in perspective can transform your leadership and overall sense of fulfillment and balance.