The Power of Connection

Now, more than ever, we can connect with others more efficiently and faster. The internet, cell phones, and social media allow unlimited opportunities to connect with friends, family, and colleagues.

Despite the ubiquity of connection, most people report feeling less connected than ever. Loneliness, depression, and isolation rates are at all-time highs. The more connected we are to others, the less authentically connected we feel. Doesn't that seem counterintuitive?

Changes in how we work have impacted our sense of connection. Working from home, which once seemed a perk, is now an everyday occurrence, reducing the point of connection even further. Virtual meetings, a quick video chat, or a Teams message can't fully replace the value of an in-person, personal conversation.??

One of the reasons for feeling disconnected is due to the transactional nature of today's conversations. Technology strips away the interpersonal layer for efficiency, but we lose the ability to interact with other humans. While most would prefer to deal with an automated bank machine, self-serve checkout line, or find the answer using a chatbot, the underlying message is that humans aren't worth the time or effort to get to know. It's purely a transaction that needs transacting. I'm hungry; bring me my food. I need something from the store; deliver it to me with little to no interaction with me. You might assume that the time saved would allow for more human interaction. The sad reality is that we use our free time on social media platforms, watch TV alone, or do other things to entertain and distract ourselves.

Don't believe me? Check how much time you spend on your phone compared to last year, month, or week. If you are like everyone else, your usage has gone up. For comparison, the average American spends 508 minutes or 8 hours and 5 minutes daily consuming digital media. That's an increase of 5 minutes from the prior year. We are getting to the point where the increases will be less year over year as we approach the maximum hours the average person is awake.

Humans are social beings. We long for and need social interactions. (Yes, even introverts need social interactions). Think about how we punish prisoners. We place them in isolation with no ability to communicate. It's such a cruel punishment that activists are pushing for it to be eliminated as a form of punishment.??

As a leader, you are responsible for ensuring your team feels connected. This may be challenging when schedules are overloaded, and the team is tasked with doing more with less. Communication needs to occur at the individual and group levels. It requires going beyond the simple "How was your weekend?" Emphasizing interpersonal communication, slowing down, and intentionally adding space for non-work conversations are key to getting to know people better.

It also helps tremendously when you can reach out and engage when there isn't a specific ask of the team member. We are conditioned to think that the only type of conversation is one where someone needs something from us. This transactional-only conversation leaves us equating the relationship as a "use or be used" experience. Ideally, you want your team to see their relationship with you as more valuable than just that. They need to see that in action if they want to believe it.

This week, look for opportunities to get to know your team and others more personally. Make an effort to establish connections. Ask non-work-related questions to better understand what matters most to them.

Need help figuring out what questions to ask? Don't worry! The good people at BetterUp put together 60+ questions that you can use. You can find them here:

60 Questions to Ask

Have a great week connecting with others!

Have a question you want to ask? Feel free to respond below or message me. Thank you for your support and feedback. It means a lot to me!