The Power of being Grateful

The definition of grateful is feeling or showing thanks or appreciation for something. So many definitions but they all mean the same thing. Sounds simple. Sounds like something we all would feel or express. Is it a natural thing – being grateful? 

I often state that things like happiness and kindness are choices. I feel the same way about gratefulness. It is a choice. It is a state of mind. If you agree with my thinking then the obvious questions would be why on earth would people not want to feel grateful? Using that same thought process why would someone not want to be happy? Why would someone not want to be kind or choose kindness? I believe that while those are great questions it is not as easy as you may think. Embracing the mindset and taking action to ensure you feel grateful takes effort. You have to train yourself to do it. Almost train yourself to be grateful.  

Why is being grateful harder for some people?

There has been some study done at a genetic level on how your genes may have an effect on your predisposition to gratefulness. The research suggests that some people may be more or less prone to actually feeling grateful. They may have the exact same situation and one will feel gratitude while another does not. Other studies look at your brain. So much research on how one person's brain and activity in different parts of the brain differ from another person. In the case of gratefulness it appears that there are differences. What is not clear is if we are born with these differences or they occur as a result of our experiences and the effects of those experiences on our brain. Either way it seems to suggest that like genetics the predisposition to grateful is rooted in our physical body and makeup. 

Another factor that has great effect is our personality. Although some suggest that some parts of our personality can be a result of how we are born, most seem to agree this is more a result of our experiences and influences as we grow up. People can grow up under the same circumstances. They can even be from the same parents and raised in the same home. They still will end up with different personalities. My two sons are a great example of that. Just like my sons some people are more materialistic than others. Some are more envious of others and the success they have or the things they own. Some people also have worked on other factors like kindness more than others. Several different traits that you have will also affect both your personality as well as your disposition towards gratefulness. 

So it appears that some factors we are born with. It also appears that many of the factors are more about who we are as a person. I personally believe that although some factors are a result of our genetics and our brain the vast majority is still in our mind. To me that means we still own it. So it is still a choice.

Why would we even want to be grateful?

So in my mind it is still a choice. Like all choices I always want to weigh the pros and the cons before I select something. Being grateful is a choice – why make that choice?

Well to answer that question I need to decide what I think being grateful is. To me gratefulness is tied to happiness. I want to be happy. Everyone wants to be happy. I look at these things as really just emotions. There are positive emotions and negative ones. The more positive emotions we have or concentrate on the happier we are. Too many negative emotions and the reverse is true. I was reading a post earlier this week. It talked about attraction. It said that happiness attracts happiness. Same for kindness and gratefulness. I think we can all agree with that. Sadly the same is true on the flip side. Hatred attracts hatred – for example. So if being grateful will attract more gratefulness – what does that even mean. You may be grateful of something great in your life. Maybe a relationship. Maybe where you live. Maybe for your friendships. No matter what is on that list you know what they are and why they are things you are grateful for. If you spend your time thinking about them the power of attraction states that you are more likely to seek them out and therefore attain more things to be grateful for. 

I made a choice to be grateful. I did not spend a great deal of time studying up on the whys. I did it for a lot of reasons. Anyone who knows me understands I have an interesting past. Not a great deal of things to be grateful for. Part of my transition and healing involved taking on a gratefulness mindset. Focus on what I did have to be grateful for instead of all of the things that surrounded me. That was a long time ago. This process started over 25 years ago. Almost half my lifetime ago. It took time. Since then I have read up on the benefits of gratefulness. And that list is a long one. 

For me it helps me in so many areas. I am grateful and want to live longer. Maybe that is why I became such a fitness nut. Although I have work to do on my diet and a few other things I think part of my fitness lifestyle is due to how grateful I am as a person. I am now 58 this year. I run and as I age the aches and pains – even without injury – add up. I do not even think about them. I am grateful that I can still run. I am grateful that by doing so I hopefully will be around longer to enjoy all the things I have to be grateful for. Long story short – it helps me physically. 

Physically is great but the best benefits for me are on the inside. Earlier I mentioned emotions. Being grateful is just an emotion. But it is a good emotion. I have found that having these good emotions always present and always being concentrated on makes me happier. More alive. I am more positive about my future both personally and professionally. I think so many feelings and emotions are tied. They are all in little groups. Being grateful for me has made me better and stronger with other emotions and or traits. Because I am truly grateful I am more kind. Kindness is huge for me. I am more forgiving. I have greater empathy. 

Lastly I will say that it keeps me positive. This is not a result of science or study. I believe that we only have so much room in our minds for things. I do not have a number. Again not science. But I think if you fill your mind or soul with so many positive emotions and thoughts there comes a time when there is no room left. No room for negative thoughts or emotions. No room for hatred. No room for fear. Only room for joy, happiness, kindness and yes gratefulness.

Gratefulness Challenge

I made a choice. Oddly enough when I made this choice I had very little to be grateful for. Certainly my list is much larger today. I challenge each of you to take some time out. Sit down with a pen and paper – sorry I am old – or at your computer and list all of the things you are grateful for. No time limit but do not just list 8 things and say you are done. Really put time into it and think. Just you alone. No help. Do not go to the internet to find out what you should be grateful for. Just make your on list. I hope if you do this properly your list is long. Maybe pages long even in just bullet points. Now rank them. Take the top twenty and make them large and bold. Add some colour. Print this out and post it. Look at it daily and spend 5 minutes really thinking about your list. Do this every day for a month. I can almost guarantee you will be a happier person and will be experiencing a lot of other related changes. The results are not going to be collected. No papers posted. This is just for you. And my hope is that at least one persons life is changed for the better as a result. It sure had that effect for me.