The Power of an Apology

IN July?2000, the California State Legislature in the United States passed a bill designed to relieve people of liability if they express sympathy to an individual who was injured in an accident in which they themselves were involved. Why the legislation? It was noted that when an accident causes injury or damage, people often hesitate to extend an apology lest it be construed in court as an admission of guilt. On the other hand, those who feel that they should be given a prompt apology may get upset, and a minor accident may turn into a major dispute.

What a strange world we live in......

As suppliers attempt to correct a mistake as fast as possible, many times the simple expression "I'm sorry" is lost. Some suppliers and buyers want to save face and protect their reputation by not showing any personal accountability when an error occurs. Apologizing can be perceived as a sign of weakness or guilt and a persons pride may simply be too great to allow them to take full responsibility. The result can be a foundation built on distrust and lies, and that foundation will eventually crumble.

However, a precious opportunity is missed when we do not humble ourselves and admit mistakes. By allowing ourselves to be vulnerable and genuinely honest, we create a space for forgiveness and for trust to be reestablished and strengthened.

Buyer: "Where is my material? I issued this PO over a week ago."

Supplier: "Let me check my inbox......I don't see the PO in my email..." [it is there] "perhaps it got sent to my junk folder or is it stuck in your draft folder?"

Buyer: "No, I see it in my sent folder going directly to you and I have emailed you plenty of times before."

Supplier: "That is so weird...." [not really, you are lying.] "Well, if you would like to send it again I would be happy to jump on this for you."

This interchange is probably one you have seen or have been party to before. It happens. The issue will still be resolved, the supplier may even expedite the material to make up for the mistake, and maybe the material still arrives as originally needed because of quick action on a suppliers part. The buyer may even be very happy to have received the material on time in spite of the misstep. However, a small crack was formed in that relationship. Ownership of the mistake was not claimed. In fact an argument could be made that in a subtle way, the supplier placed the fault on the buyer. How could we have wielded the power of an apology to correct the mistake?

Buyer: "Where is my material? I issued this PO over a week ago."

Supplier: "Let me check my inbox.....Wow, there it is. I am so sorry, Joe. I must have overlooked this email. I wish I had a better excuse but this was completely my fault. I apologize for that."

Buyer: "It's ok. I realize mistakes happen. However, I am in a bind now as I was supposed to get this material by tomorrow. Any ideas?"

Supplier: "Tell you what, I will jump off this call and meet with our Order Fulfillment team and have this order prioritized and shipped with expedited service at our cost. If there is anything that would prevent this from being delivered by tomorrow I will reach back out to you asap. Again apologies on missing that PO!"

Buyer: "Thanks so much! You have always been great to work with. If you can't make tomorrow work for delivery that's ok, I could wait until the day after. I am just happy we caught it and it's in process now. Have great day!"

The error on the part of the supplier is no longer the focal point. The value of the partnership shined through. People in general, love to interact, cooperate, and make friends with those who are humble. On the contrary, those who are prideful, egotistical, or guarded with excuses, have trouble making and keeping friends, protecting relationships, and finding success in business.

An ancient proverb states: "Pride is before a crash and a haughty spirit before stumbling."

By allowing yourself as a Supplier or a Buyer to demonstrate humility and take responsibility for mistakes, we are contributing to a better work environment, a happier family life, and a stronger community. In other words, we are being a good human.

by Scott Sanders, VP of Business Development, Skylab Manufacturing