The Potential Paradox: Why People Don't See What You See (And How It Kills Momentum)

A quick note before we dive in: This exploration of potential is rich enough that I've decided to break it into two parts.

As "The Potentialist," I've spent years exploring how we perceive, and misperceive, the possibilities in people and ideas. After receiving feedback that my last article on power was a bit dense (though valuable!), I want to give this topic the space it deserves. Today, we'll explore why traditional approaches to creating momentum often fail, especially when dealing with potential. Next week, I'll share ideas and approaches to bridge what I call "The Potential Gap."

Let's start with a simple question: How do you get someone to choose you and your ideas?

If you're like most people, you've been taught three methods:

1. Use Power – If you have authority, influence, or status, you tell them what to do. If you're the boss, the team listens. If you're the coolest person in the room, your friends follow. But here's the catch, when people don't want to choose your option, you have to keep turning up the dial. And eventually, you run out of dial.
2. Plead – This is power's more amiable cousin. Instead of demanding, you ask. Nicely. Repeatedly. Please do this. Please understand why this matters. Please take action before it's too late. Pleading shifts the dynamic from a command to a request. But like power, it has a volume problem. There's only so many times you can ask before people stop hearing you and the answer becomes "no."
3. Pitch – This is the one most people default to when power and pleading aren't options. You make a case. You sell the idea. You help them see why it's a good move.

But here's the problem with all three methods.

Power requires you to feel powerful. Not everyone does, and even if you do, power is finite. Pleading makes you feel powerless. It wears out quickly. And pitching... well, the moment you answer the question 'Why should I buy into you?' you're on a slippery slope of over-promoting vs. underselling.

But the biggest issue? When it comes to ideas, the future, or people, the call to action isn't binary. It's not a simple yes/no, buy/don't buy, stop/go. It's more nuanced than that. There's a reason why when you ask someone, 'What do you want for your future?' the answer is almost always, 'It depends.'

Any request in any form is asking them to choose the future. And that future is always ultimately unknown.

Unknown future = Potential

Ideas, people, and the future are, by definition, potential. And potential means more than one possibility at once. It's unknown. It's unformed. It's not a product on a shelf with a set price and a clear function.

Here’s what I continue to see, pitching works beautifully when the thing being pitched fits neatly into a known category. But potential doesn't fit in a box. Potential isn't supposed to be "gotten" right away. It's supposed to be discovered.

When Pitching Backfires: The Potential Paradox

Do you want to discover this phenomenon all by yourself? Let me show you. By re-introducing you to the concept of the Silent Sentence. Here's a picture of one of the Sharpies on my desk.

Instantly, without me saying a word, your brain fills in the blanks:

• "I can write with it."
• "It has a green lid, so the ink is probably green."
• "It's worth about $1."

Before I even start telling you about it, you've already created a Silent Sentence in your head about what it is, what to do with it, and what it's worth.

Before we go there, let's add another layer. Because companies don't just rely on your silent sentence, they shape it. Let's look at how Sharpie might position this product. (I asked AI to tell me how they describe it, so take this as an approximation.)

"When inspiration strikes, reach for the marker professionals trust. Sharpie? permanent markers deliver bold, instant-dry ink that writes on virtually any surface and stays put. From precise fine points to broad strokes, our iconic markers make your mark unmistakable. Whether you're organizing your workspace, creating masterpieces, or labeling life's important items, Sharpie? gives you the confidence of permanent, fade-resistant performance. Because your ideas deserve to stand out—and last. Sharpie?. Write Out Loud."

See what happened there?

The Sharpie pitch isn't just about a pen. It's about action, creativity, and confidence. It builds on what you already know a Sharpie does and layers in emotion and identity. And it works because your brain already understands what a Sharpie is.

Here’s what I want you to pay attention to. The pitch amplifies an existing story, your silent sentence about the pen, it doesn't have to create a new one from scratch.

Now let's do something different. Because when something doesn't fit an existing story, we can't just reinforce what's already there. We have to create a new one from scratch. Imagine I show you a Magic Quantum Pen. No, there is no image, I need you to use your imagination.

And then I give you a pitch:

"Break the boundaries of conventional marking with the Magic Quantum Pen. Our revolutionary permanent marker harnesses quantum technology to deliver ink that exists in multiple states simultaneously—visible on any surface yet never bleeding through. The proprietary Quantum-Flow? formula adapts to your writing surface at the molecular level, creating marks that resist fading across dimensions of time. Whether you're annotating complex equations, mapping multiverse theories, or simply labeling lunch containers, the Magic Quantum Pen creates certainty in an uncertain world. Because when precision matters across all possible realities, only one marker collapses the wave function of possibility into permanent clarity. Magic Quantum Pen. Infinite Possibilities. One Mark."

Oh, and by the way, it costs $10,000.

What's happening in your brain now?

If I had to guess, you're landing on one of these three Silent Sentences:

1. "Joanna has lost it. It's a pen. She just added sparkly words to it. And $10,000? Absolutely not." → No momentum.
2. "I like Joanna, so I'll politely listen, but I don't 'get' this whole quantum thing. It doesn't make sense to me." → No momentum.
3. "Wait. I know what a pen is, but what does she mean by 'quantum magic'? Let me ask." → Momentum.

The first two responses shut down everything - curiosity, action, whatever you're hoping for. The third opens the door to the future.

“I don’t get it, but can you help me understand what it is? I want to know.”

Here’s where things get tricky. If you're presenting something where the listener has to build the 'what is this?' story from scratch, where they either have no prior experience with it or already have a strong existing narrative (like 'magic isn't real' or 'I don't understand quantum'), then the way they perceive its potential will follow their mental pathways, not yours.

In telling you about this Magic Quantum Pen, I have to live in the uncertainty of YOUR reaction to “Magic Quantum” and what fabulous things it might do.

Would you buy this Magic Quantum Pen I’m pitching? What’s your reaction to the price? Does that even matter?

Or, because it was me telling you about it, are you curious to learn more? And the binary no/yes, buy/don’t buy shifts to “perhaps there might be potential in this thing Joanna is talking about. Tell me more.”

See? Momentum. And non-linear momentum at that.

This idea is why quotes like 'You can't be what you can't see' and 'Potential is infinitely easier to recognize when it looks and sounds like you' hold true. When something unfamiliar arrives, people don't evaluate it on its own merits, they try to fit it into the stories in their minds they already know. They create a Silent Sentence. And the thing between “No.” and “Momentum” is The Potential Gap.

Currently, I've been using a pen to make my point. But don't let this example mislead you, this concept applies far beyond products or sales pitches. The Potential Gap affects every area where we encounter new possibilities: ideas, career paths, relationships, and visions of the future.

At the heart of this gap is a fundamental challenge of human perception. We can only recognize what we have mental categories for. This is why recognition plays such a crucial role in creating any kind of momentum.

Why Recognition Matters in Creating Momentum

Let's unpack what just happened in your mind with my magical quantum pen.

For someone to see the value in something, they need a way to categorize it. If it fits into a familiar mental model, they get it immediately. That is why traditional pitching works so well for things that already exist.

But what happens when someone sees something truly new, something they have never encountered before?

Instead of immediately recognizing its value, their brain stalls. Not because they are rejecting it, but because they do not know what box to put it in. And when people do not know how to categorize something, they hesitate.

This hesitation isn't a conscious choice. It's our brain's automatic response to the unfamiliar. And it's this precise moment of pause that kills momentum before it can even begin.

Think about how often you've shared an idea you were excited about, only to be met with silence, polite nodding, or that dreaded "I'll think about it." These aren't necessarily rejections. They're indicators of hesitation, signs that the other person's brain is struggling to recognize what you're offering.

In the world of potential, hesitation is the invisible barrier we rarely talk about. It's not about the quality of your idea or its actual value. It's about whether the other person has the mental frameworks to process what you're presenting.

The difference between "No" and "Let me learn more" often comes down to whether curiosity can overcome this initial hesitation. And cultivating that curiosity, rather than simply pitching harder, is where the magic happens.

This hesitation isn't only about ideas. It applies to how we see people too. When someone doesn't fit our existing categories for "what a leader looks like" or "what an expert in this field resembles," we hesitate to recognize their potential, regardless of their actual capabilities.

Understanding this hesitation is the first step to addressing the Potential Gap. Because when we know why people pause, we can begin to create the conditions where they might choose to explore instead.

And exploring creates momentum.

But why does this matter so much right now? Why is understanding the Potential Gap more crucial than ever before?

Why This Matters Now More Than Ever

The Potential Gap has always existed, but its impact is amplified in today's rapidly changing world. We are facing unprecedented rates of innovation and disruption across every industry and aspect of society.

You put forward something you think is exciting, obvious, maybe even inevitable. And yet, instead of enthusiasm, you're met with a no, feedback on what they think it is, or just hesitation. You were expecting someone to say "OMG what a brilliant idea" or "you'd be perfect for this job," but they don't because they don't perceive its potential the way you do. All of these responses kill momentum.

That's because when people encounter something new, they don't evaluate it in a vacuum. They filter it through what they already know. And if they can't categorize it quickly, they pause.

I call this chasm between how you see potential and how others perceive it "The Potential Gap."

This matters more than ever because the future has always been uncertain, but now? It's becoming harder to see, faster. The speed at which new ideas emerge (generative AI, web3, climate adaptation technologies, the seemingly weekly changes to how we work) is accelerating. At the same time, it's not just new ideas we need to worry about. The foundations we once considered solid are crumbling beneath our feet. The reliable "this is how things work" across almost every dimension is getting shaken up. Education, healthcare, government, work, leadership, and systems we thought we understood are becoming unrecognizable. Even the current state feels unstable. Perhaps we've entered what we might call the Ambiguity Age.

We need to get better at handling potential because the "stuff we haven't seen before" list keeps getting bigger. The hesitation we're all experiencing runs both ways. You might face resistance when sharing your ideas with others who can't yet see what you see. And you might find yourself pausing when encountering someone else's vision of the future. Potential, by its nature, creates uncertainty.

The tricky part? You can't always hear this hesitation because it often manifests in silence. The subtle shift in body language. The absence of questions. The polite nod without follow-up. These silent signals speak volumes about the mental categorization happening behind the scenes. We stall, we wait, and we hesitate without saying a word. Perhaps it's both the Ambiguity Age and the Hesitation Age, two sides of the same coin.

I realize this isn't a "5 Easy Steps to Crush It" concept. Potential is inherently complex because we're dealing with human perception and the unknown. But as the world accelerates and transforms, we need more sophisticated tools to navigate it. The simple approaches that worked in more stable times won't serve us in this new landscape.

What's Coming Next Week

In next week's newsletter, I'll share practical techniques for bridging The Potential Gap, including:

• How to spot the signs of someone's silent sentence before you fully explain your idea
• Creating space for curiosity instead of immediate decision
• Inviting wonder rather than certainty
• The multiple types of momentum and how to create the right kind for your situation
• What I learned from my own painful experience with this phenomenon

As someone who lives comfortably in the space of ambiguity—it's why I'm called The Potentialist, after all—I've made it my mission to help others see the magic in what's not yet formed. The world needs more people who can navigate potential effectively, especially as the pace of change accelerates.

Until next week,

Did you miss the newsletter about Power? You can read it here: https://www.dhirubhai.net/pulse/power-isnt-what-you-think-how-elizabeth-bennet-mr-darcy-bloor-nirwc

Joanna Bloor | Potentialist?

Every idea creates a silent sentence in our minds. When they echo between people, momentum begins.