The Potential Dire Intersection of Work, Depression and Suicide

September is Suicide Prevention Month. One month is not enough. According to the Centers for Disease Control (CDC), suicide is the twelfth leading cause of death in the United States. But when categorized by age groups, the statistics are far scarier. Between the ages of 10 - 14 and 25 - 34, suicide is the second leading cause of death. Between the ages of 15 - 24, it is the third leading cause of death. And between the ages of 35 - 44, it is the fourth leading cause of death. There are twice as many suicides per year as there are homicides. There is close to one death every 11 minutes in the United States from suicide. Around 12.2 million people in the United States seriously think about suicide, 3.2 million people plan their suicide and 1.2 million people actually attempt it. These are pandemic rates that directly impact the current and future workforce. I also can’t help but think that work significantly impacts these numbers. The reality is most people spend more time at work during waking hours than they do at home. This got me thinking a lot about the intersection of work, depression and suicide.

Have you ever heard an interesting story about a harsh, incorrigible, mean CEO, manager or boss? Maybe it's first-hand experience. You probably assume that they have some character defect that dictates their behavior. That they enjoy being a scourge to their co-workers and are simply incapable of changing how they act. But what if that wasn’t the issue at all? What if they actually have no idea there is something legitimately, and biologically, wrong with them? Five years ago, I would not have believed this.

I’ve always viewed myself as a ‘good’ person. I make mistakes. A lot of mistakes. But I do believe my heart is usually in the right place and my intent is principled. But for many years I suffered from overwhelming and uncontrollable anger. I was good at hiding it, but it would simmer inside of me consistently. The littlest things would drive me mad. Loud chewing, a car driving too slow, someone being three minutes late to a meeting. While my external reaction was usually measured, my internal reaction was explosive.

I was routinely frustrated and confused, aware that my anger was not proportional to the catalyst, but unable to curtail my reaction.? I assumed I suffered from a character defect like the one mentioned above. It was the worst, and I mean the worst, feeling in the world. A combination of helplessness with a healthy dose of out of control. There had to be something wrong, but I had no idea what it was.? The problem is, I was looking in the wrong place.

I’m going to list a series of symptoms here and then I want you to guess what you think the disease is: (a) difficulty concentrating; (b) a lack of attention to detail; (c) difficulty making decisions; (d) restlessness; (e) aches; (f) pains; (g) irritability; and (h) anger. Would you think cancer? Neurological disorder? Migraines? The answer is, none of the above. These are classic symptoms of depression.?

Some more statistics. The National Institute of Mental Health estimates that “21 million adults had at least one major depressive episode [in 2020]. This number represents 8.4% of all U.S. adults” and that “an estimated 14.8 million U.S. adults aged 18 or older had at least one major depressive episode with severe impairment in the past year.” Frighteningly, it may be reasonable to assume that these numbers are actually marginally, if not substantially, lower than the actual incidence. If a person is suffering from depression, but not experiencing the more traditional symptoms like hopelessness and sadness, they may not consider depression as a possibility.? Their incidence will never be reported. I fit into that category. I never considered depression until I started therapy and was actually diagnosed with it. It's not hard to imagine a lot of people in the same situation.

For me, I held it inside. Very rarely did I let my personal demons impact others. But millions of people with these issues are likely running companies, managing people and impacting others.? They may not mean to be. They may not even know something is wrong. And their issues may create a trickle down effect that causes damage to their employees. It’s a vicious cycle that likely plays out in hundreds or thousands of companies a year. And likely results in many people contemplating, or actually choosing, the most dire of paths, suicide.

People have asked me, when things got the most dire and seemed completely hopeless, did I consider ending my life? It’s a difficult question to answer because yes, the thought crossed my mind. But there is a great deal of nuance between having those thoughts and being prepared to act on them. I was never prepared to act on them. But yes, I did have those thoughts. I’m not afraid or embarrassed to talk about it. Remember the CDC numbers from above? People who have these thoughts are not outliers. They are not alone. There are millions and millions of people dealing with these issues every year. And work may be exacerbating it. They may even have a boss or manager who is making their life unbearable, but not because they’re actually a bad person. That boss or manager may be suffering as well and have no idea why.

Through therapy, my anger levels have decreased. My responses are proportional to the stimulus. I’m not perfect, but I work on it. I still have some hefty fits of anger. But I no longer feel out of control. I know what is wrong. I treat it, I push forward and enjoy life. Get help if you need it. Get help if you don’t know what’s wrong. Don’t let it impact other people. Take care of yourself and others. It’s the only way we’re going to see those frightening statistics come down.

If you or someone you know is experiencing depression or suicidal thoughts, please contact the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline by dialing 988.