The Plight of Something New

As the year winds down, those annual "new year, new me" posts are flooding social media feeds. You know the ones—the posts offering the ultimate guide to a brand-new body, job, partner, and basically anything you can slap a "new" label on. They seem to have it all figured out, don't they?

Yet, each of those posts left me increasingly frustrated. It got me thinking: maybe these articles and their "how-to" guides are answering the wrong question. We're bombarded with media suggesting that to be better, we have to be entirely new. The main character has to relocate to a new city to find happiness, needs the latest car to be cool—this narrative is everywhere we look.

Taylor Swift once mentioned in her Netflix documentary, "Miss Americana," how she constantly reinvents herself to capture her fans' attention. But for us, who aren’t vying for millions of strangers to notice us, do we really need a complete overhaul?

What if we shifted the question from "How can I make myself new?" to "What can I do to make myself better?"

We're overcomplicating this. Trying to overhaul ourselves often sets us up for failure. You don't have to quit a job you like but don't love. You don't need to completely abandon your favorite lunch spot just because you want to budget better. It doesn't have to be that extreme. We don't have to shed our past entirely to make space for who we want to become.

Perhaps our yearning for something new is just our consciousness nudging us towards the potential for improvement.

Maybe it's about small shifts, like rotating your favorite restaurant visits with homemade meals to help balance the budget better. Or perhaps instead of a harmful narrative around your body size, you start to say, "my body is worthy of being treated better than what I've been doing." Reflecting on why we don't love our jobs and finding specific solutions to improve those aspects can make a significant difference, too!

These actions don't demand a new you; they simply need intentional reflection on ways to focus on being better. Yet, we're human. There's allure in the idea of a fresh start, a chance to be a better version of ourselves. It's this allure that conveniently sidesteps the pressure to reinvent, which often leads to unrealistic expectations and stress. And who has time for that?

Shifting your mindset from chasing newness to instead aiming for improvement can be transformative, because then it turns into being about nurturing our essence while acknowledging areas for growth. Change doesn't have to be a grand overhaul; it can be gradual and sustainable.

When we seek improvement, we affirm the value of who we are. It's not about discarding ourselves but refining and enhancing. This approach involves introspection, understanding why change is desired, and making purposeful adjustments.

In health, it's not about drastic body transformations but fostering a healthier relationship with ourselves. In careers, it's not always about a complete switch but enriching our current roles. Consider your personal relationships. Instead of seeking an entirely new partner, it might mean fostering healthier communication patterns or nurturing empathy within existing relationships. It's about recognizing the value of the connections we have while consciously working on making them more fulfilling.

We can preserve our core while aiming for betterment. If we approach change with compassion and patience, acknowledging that small steps lead to significant change, the stress of needing to be entirely new might fade.

As we begin to step into whatever 2024 has in store for us, I want to encourage you (myself included) to embrace intentional, incremental growth. Let's work on cultivating a culture where improvement is cherished, where self-compassion and reflection guides our journey towards the best versions of ourselves, one step at a time.