Please DON'T Be Your "Authentic Self" at Work

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As an executive coach for over 13 years, I've had the privilege of working with thousands of professionals across various industries. I hear the same desires echoed time and time again. They want to speak up more confidently, to have greater influence, to earn the respect and recognition they deserve at work.

These aspirations are nearly universal. Whether you're a rising star in a tech startup or a seasoned manager in a Fortune 500 company, the ability to communicate effectively and make your voice heard is crucial for career advancement.

But here's where things get interesting - and a bit contradictory.

In the very next breath, after expressing their desire for more influence and visibility, many of these same professionals will say something like this:

"Being more vocal just isn't authentic to who I am. Seeking the spotlight doesn't feel genuine."

Sound familiar?

Let's unpack this for a second, because it reveals a crucial misunderstanding about authenticity in the workplace - one that might be holding you back from the impact and compensation you want...and deserve.

When Being Your "Authentic Self" at Work is a Trap

"Be authentic!"

It's the holy grail of career advice, right? The promise that if you can just be "you" at work, you'll find fulfillment, success, and that elusive work-life harmony we're all chasing.

But what if I told you that this well-intentioned mantra might actually be the very thing holding you back?

What if the "authentic self" you cling to is nothing more than an elaborate disguise for negative stories you've been told about yourself?

Think back to your formative years, both personally and professionally. How many times were you told to:

• Tone it down
• Grow a thicker skin
• Don't rock the boat
• Stop being so sensitive
• Check your emotions at the door
• Keep your head down and do the work

Especially for Sensitive Strivers - those of us who feel deeply and aim high - these messages hit particularly hard. We internalized them, believing that to succeed, we needed to become smaller, quieter, less... ourselves.

Over time, this shrunken version of you became comfortable. Familiar. You started to believe it was the "real" you.

But is quiet, hesitant persona – the one that avoids conflict, stays silent in meetings, and shrinks from the spotlight – is it truly authentic??

…Or is it a sophisticated coping mechanism?

A shield built to protect yourself from criticism, rejection, and the discomfort of standing out?

The Cost of Clinging to Authenticity

Let's examine this "authentic" behavior more closely:

1. When you don't speak up in meetings, is it really because you have nothing to say? Or is it fear of judgment masquerading as introversion?
2. When you allow colleagues to take credit for your work, is that really your authentic self? Or is it conflict avoidance wearing the mask of humility?
3. When you downplay your achievements, is that genuine modesty? Or is it insecurity pretending to be authenticity?

Sometimes, what we call "being authentic" is really just playing it safe.

It's safer not to speak up.

It's safer not to stand out.

It's safer to stay small.

But safer doesn't mean more authentic. And it certainly doesn't mean more fulfilling.

This shrinking act comes at a cost. Not just to your career progression, but to your sense of self-worth and fulfillment at work.

Every time you hold back, a part of you withers. Every time you let others take credit, your confidence erodes. Every time you dim your light, your potential fades.

Redefining Authenticity

Being authentic at work doesn't mean voicing every thought or feeling without filter. That's not authenticity – that's lack of professional judgement. It's not about being the loudest voice in the room or changing your personality entirely.

Real workplace authenticity means being a sharper, more impactful version of you.

So the next time you find yourself holding back at work in the name of "authenticity," ask yourself: Is this really my true self speaking? Or is it fear, habit, or outdated self-perception?

Because it's completely possible to be a version of you who:

? Thoughtfully present your solutions in a meeting, leading to you spearhead a high-visibility project?

? Matter-of-factly articulates your team's achievements to management, resulting in more budget for your department

? Confidently negotiates a 20% salary increase by effectively communicating your value and impact

That's still you. Just a more confident, influential version.

TOMORROW: The Confident Communicator 3-Day Masterclass

In this LIVE virtual event that starts tomorrow September 11th, you’ll discover how to earn respect and recognition at work…?

Without overthinking every word you say or stepping on other people’s toes.?

? On Day 1, we’ll cover how to Elevate Your Executive Presence, including techniques to express your ideas clearly and get your voice heard in a room of strong personalities

? On Day 2, we’ll tackle Saying No & Standing Your Ground, featuring scripts for pushing back on unreasonable demands without burning bridges

? On Day 3, we’ll talk about The Art of Self Advocacy and Visibility so you can position yourself from a promotion or raise?

>> RSVP for the FREE Confident Communicator masterclass here