With Plastic Surgery, It’s Normal to Look Worse Before You Look Better
The following is adapted from You're Not a Vanity Purchase.
It’s a couple of weeks after your plastic surgery. You’ve begun healing, but you look worse than when you went in for the procedure. When you look in the mirror, all you can see is purple bruising, lumps from swelling, and scars.
What have I done? you think, terrified. Have I made a horrible mistake?
This scenario is all too common. Even with detailed instructions about what to expect post-surgery, it’s easy to become overwhelmed and begin spiraling to a dark place.
Following a procedure, the number one question patients ask me is, “Is this normal?” Almost every single time, my answer is a resounding yes. You may be feeling scared right now, but it can help to know that others have experienced exactly what you are and come out happily on the other side. So in this article, I’ll share with you the roller coaster of emotions that one patient, Valerie, experiences after her plastic surgery.
(Note: This article is not meant to be a substitute for medical advice. Please contact your doctor regarding any specific questions or concerns.)
What to Expect the Day of Surgery
Valerie is fifty-five, and after a consultation with her plastic surgeon, she has decided to have full facial rejuvenation, an upper and lower blepharoplasty (eyelid lift), brow lift, facelift, fat injections, and laser skin resurfacing: “the works.”
The day of the surgery, she’s nervous. She struggled with some guilt and shame over the decision to get plastic surgery. She’s not a superficial or vain person. She just wants to feel more confident in her own skin. As nervous as she is, she’s also really excited. Her husband, Michael, is just plain nervous. He doesn’t approve of the surgery but is there to support her.
The surgery takes several hours, and when Michael goes to the recovery area to see Valerie, he almost collapses at all the bandages, swelling, and bruising. Valerie doesn’t even look like his wife. She looks like some alien or avatar, and her wide, puffed-out face surrounded by so much gauze makes her head look like a living Q-tip. Oh God, there are “drains” taped to the side of her head. Pipes with blood. The nurses told him about all of this stuff, but seeing it is nearly overwhelming.
The nurse assures him this is all normal and takes him through the medications and post-op care. Valerie is gorked out and having a grand old time, but Michael is more worried than ever.
The Next Days
Valerie and Michael return the next morning for a checkup appointment. As the nurse unwraps Valerie’s bandages, Michael realizes she actually looks worse today, if that is even possible. Like some puffy Pillsbury Doughboy. The doctor does a quick physical exam, then confidently states that everything is looking great. Michael thinks, This is what you call “looking great”?
Valerie is comfortable except for the fact that she is having a little trouble opening her swollen eyes to see anything. She is surprised to hear the doctor say the swelling could be worse tomorrow. The doctor gives her a few shots of lidocaine, a numbing anesthetic, and painlessly removes the drains.
They go home, and sure enough, the doctor was right: the next day the swelling is even worse. It looks as if her cheeks could be popped like a balloon. By the second day, the swelling in her eyelids has come down at least enough for her to see. After a few more days, the swelling gets much better.
She shows up for her next appointment, three days after the surgery, and has her eyelid sutures taken out. While it doesn’t really hurt, it isn’t exactly fun either. Her face has this weird kind of numbness, and her remaining face/brow lift sutures are starting to itch.
As the days go by, she sees small, encouraging signs of improvement. The swelling and the bruising are going down little by little. Although Valerie is starting to recognize her own face, she is not exactly thrilled with what she sees.
Two Weeks Later
After two weeks have passed, Valerie is wondering why she did this. While she is looking better, she can’t help but focus on the purple still left, the lump by her right cheek, the scars around her ears, and the scars on her eyelids. “Christ…what was I thinking?” she sobs gently to herself in her bathroom.
Michael comes in and snaps. It’s been a long two weeks for him too. He was happy when his nursing duties were over and he was able to escape back to work on day five. “I told you not to do this,” he says. “Don’t like the way you look? That’s your own fault.”
A torrent of guilt and regret washes over Valerie, and she sobs uncontrollably. She feels utterly alone.
At her two-week follow-up appointment, she has a million questions she wants to ask: “Am I still supposed to be bruised at this point? Am I still swollen? Why are the scars so red and itchy? Why do my eyes still look glassy? Is this the way I am going to look?”
The doctor seems to know what is coming and says, “I understand you have a bunch of questions and concerns. Let’s talk about them.”
Valerie unloads, “What about…?” Normal. “And…?” Normal. “And also…?” Normal. The doctor assures her that she is progressing quite nicely and reminds her that although the major part of recovery is in the first few days, significant healing and changes will still take place over the next month.
Then he explains that it is not uncommon for people to feel downright depressed at the two-week mark from surgery and even have some major regrets. In fact, there is a physiologic reason as to why she may feel down at this point: her fight-or-flight hormones have been depleted from the two weeks of healing, anxiety, and less-than-perfect sleep.
Valerie gets the sense he’s been here before with thousands of people and had this same conversation with them. She leaves the office feeling better and a bit more confident. Or, at least, not completely alone.
Amazing Results
Valerie plans to return to work on Monday, which is postop day sixteen. She knows she is still swollen, but the makeup they showed her at the office really helps. She practices on Sunday, concealing the evidence. When she is done with her makeup, she stares long and hard. Holy crap, she thinks, I actually look pretty good.
Valerie goes to work the next day. She is a nervous wreck. To her surprise, people notice that something is different with her, but they can’t seem to tell that she had plastic surgery. “Wow, you look great!” they say. “Vacation really agreed with you.”
The strange thing is, she not only looks different, but feels different at work. She feels more centered, more engaging. People seem to react to her differently, as well.
Months go by and Valerie goes to the doctor for her six-month postoperative visit. Everything has changed on the outside as well as the inside. The scars have faded to nothing over the past few months. The lumps and bumps and the numbness she felt over the past couple of months are pretty much gone. She feels completely healed, although the doctor said things will continue to improve over the course of a year.
When she looks at her before-and-after pictures, she’s shocked. She can’t believe she walked around like that for so long, feeling badly about herself. She doesn’t regret her decision at all. In fact, she thinks it’s one of the best decisions she’s ever made.
For more advice on what to expect with plastic surgery, you can find You're Not a Vanity Purchase on Amazon.
Dr. James C. Marotta is a dual-board-certified facial plastic surgeon on Long Island, New York, with degrees from some of the world’s finest institutions, including Columbia and Yale Universities. Dr. Marotta is a fellow of the American Academy of Facial Plastic and Reconstructive Surgery (AAFPRS), and since 2013, he has consistently been named the Best Cosmetic Surgeon on Long Island. Dr. Marotta has appeared in a variety of TV and print media, including Harper’s Bazaar, Huffington Post, and Fox 5 NY. While he is deeply dedicated to his work, family remains the center of Dr. Marotta’s life. He enjoys spending time with his wife and two children, traveling, playing sports, and cooking.