Pitfalls of Pre-Meetings and How They Kill Trust at Work

Have you ever gone to a meeting well prepared only to find yourself in a position like Jesus did on the road to Emmaus when he was asked: “Are you the only visitor to Jerusalem who does not know the things that have happened there in recent days?” Of everyone in the meeting, you seem to be the only one who is behind the news, visibly unprepared.

Each time you try to open your mouth to speak, you are shot down quickly in a way that clearly shows that you are dragging the team behind - a team that seems to have long been converted to buy views opposing yours.

“Hold on to that thought. Eric, can you please bring everyone to speed since it seems Emily here is a bit behind,” one outspoken member of the team steps in to bring his version of orderliness to the meeting.

Makutano Corner

Erics are always very fast when it comes to such matters. They will not hesitate to fill in and rub it in: “Chairman, from last evening’s meeting at Makutano Corner, we agreed that” … that is when it hits you that there was a meeting late in the night at Makutano Corner and yours truly missed the memo.

Do not get me wrong, pre-meetings, pre-meetups or simply catch-ups as some may want to refer to them may have rich benefits to a meeting.

Other than helping to save time, they offer participants an opportunity to align agendas, clarify objectives and ensure everyone is prepared for the main meeting. More like holding a meeting to plan for a meeting,. Does that make sense to you?

Pre-meetings are great avenues for relationship building at work and among cross-sectional teams. They may help provide context, thereby aiding the decision-making processes.

When professionally executed, such meetings can help identify potential pitfalls or issues that need to be addressed beforehand, leading to more productive and efficient main meetings.

Small Kamukunjis

This is quite normal and common in political circles. Days before a major rally, leaders are known to hold several small Kamukunjis which in a way help align members to one agenda and even give them a nice song or slogans to chant away during the main meeting, either in support or against certain speakers.

That already lets the cat out of the bag as to my stance on this whole matter. I am not a politician, neither do I agree with how they do many of their things, pre-meetings not being an exception.

One thing we cannot avoid at work is meetings. They are here with us. Meetings have become a staple for collaboration and decision-making.

You will hardly get anything done without holding a meeting. You need one to set the agenda, agree on targets, meet to monitor implementation and have another closing meeting to evaluate the outcomes.

Good as meetings may be, however, a concerning trend has emerged, I call it "meetings before the meeting." I feel such informal gatherings, often held without key stakeholders present, can inadvertently undermine trust and professionalism within teams.

This is my personal opinion, but today, I am here to convert all of you and hope that we can all agree to hold ourselves accountable to the basic principles of transparency and an open society.

For one, pre-meeting meetings by their very nature can breed feelings of exclusion and undermine transparency within teams.

When decisions are made or agendas are set without the input of all relevant parties, it can create a sense of distrust and resentment among the team.

Confusion and Misalignment

Moreover and as is usually the case, when the outcomes of these informal gatherings are not communicated effectively, it can easily lead to confusion and misalignment during the actual meeting.

Those who prefer using pre-meetings as a management tool are most often insecure, always seeking to hold cards close to their chest and drop the killer punch when the opponent least expects it.

Such informal meetings are used to perpetuate power dynamics within organizations where a select few are privy to discussions which in itself stifles diverse perspectives.

This can hinder innovation and problem-solving, as valuable insights from team members may be overlooked, given that they were not given a chance to vocalize them in the first place.

No one has a monopoly on knowledge and when you find yourself in a position where you believe you are all-knowing, just know that you know not.

I like to describe myself as a pragmatic man, which is why I will sometimes participate in these pre-meetings even when I do not believe in them for as long as they end in win-win situations. So how can we get ourselves out of this quagmire? Let me propose some quick solutions.

Meeting Protocols

First, teams need to establish clear meeting protocols, clearly defining guidelines for when and how meetings should be convened.

Be objective at all times and ensure that all relevant stakeholders are included in the planning process and that agendas are shared in advance, at least two weeks in advance.

Do you still feel that a meeting before a meeting is necessary? Why not utilize technology? Leverage digital tools such as shared calendars and collaborative platforms to streamline communication and document sharing.

This ensures that everyone has access to the same information, reducing the need for informal pre-meetings.

A good team leader keeps his or her door open to all team members. Whenever a member of my team comes to my office, even when I have another visitor, I will always ask them in and attend to their matter because I believe that for them to look for me when I am engaged, it is because of something that goes to help my work.

Leave No One Behind

Yet, certain team members, try as you may, will still be left behind. Leave no one behind, reach out to them and make use of regular check-ins to address any issues or questions before they escalate into pre-meeting discussions. You can score better by opening a ten-minute window for each team member every week to just say hi.

To ensure that everyone understands their role, you will need to clarify decision-making processes and have a clear delegation of authority that clearly defines how decisions are made within the team. This helps mitigate the need for separate pre-meetings to finalize decisions outside of formal meetings.

When all is said and done, it begins with you. As the adage goes, be a good role model and lead by example. As a leader or manager, demonstrate the importance of inclusivity and transparency by actively involving all team members in decision-making processes.

Avoid holding exclusive pre-meetings and instead foster a collaborative environment where everyone's input is valued and all feel they have an equal chance to thrive. That way, your meetings will be more productive and teams better engaged.

It gets more complicated when as a leader, sections of teams below you hold kamkunjis to discuss your agenda before the main meeting - not to prepare but to plot against it, that is when the shit flies.

Ends.../

?