The Pink Elephant in the Leadership Room: Vulnerability. Here Are 4 Strategies to Embrace It.
Lisa K. McDonald
Achieve Career Growth, Make Bold Moves & Lead Confidently ?? Executive EQ, Confidence & Career Coach | Award-Winning Brand Strategist
No one likes to admit they struggle to embrace vulnerability in their leadership. I did, and if you are, welcome, my friend—you’re not alone.
What no one talks about is a buried barrier—but we're going to talk about it here and now.
It’s not what you think it is—well, it IS, but not the way you think.
If you’ve read anything about leadership since 2010, you’ve heard it: “Vulnerability is a superpower.” Thanks, Brené Brown.
I’m all for it!
But let’s be real - embracing vulnerability isn’t as simple as flipping a switch.
The struggle is real, and here’s why:
Many of us were conditioned to climb the career ladder and:
→ Always be on
→ Always be decisive
→ Always demonstrate confident intensity
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The higher we climbed, the lonelier it felt.
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And for women, vulnerability was out of the question—show it, and you risked being labeled weak or emotional.
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This conditioning wasn’t just a mindset; it became almost Pavlovian. It made vulnerability taboo.
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We know now that vulnerability isn’t a weakness, it’s the: → Foundation of trust
→ Key to authentic leadership
→ Core of building resilient, high-performing teams
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Early in my leadership journey, I didn’t have the luxury of avoiding vulnerability.
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I had only two options:
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In my first leadership role, I was all about ‘fake it till you make it.’
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But in my second role, with a larger team and new systems, faking it wasn’t an option.
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I was in over my head. I didn't know the systems, processes, or acronym soup.
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So, I took a deep breath, gathered my team, and said,
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“You are the experts. I’m here to support you. I’m leaning on your expertise to help me remove what’s standing in your way.”
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Scary? Yes.
Humbling? Very.
Appreciated? Absolutely.
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Now, after 15 years of executive coaching, I teach leaders how to make vulnerability a habit—without losing their minds.
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Here’s How:
1 → Redefine Your Definition of Vulnerability in Leadership.
It’s not about airing all your insecurities. It’s about being real about the challenges you face.
Admit when you don’t have all the answers and let your team help fill the gaps.
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2 → Cultivate a Safe Environment for You and Your Team.
Lead with authenticity, and your team will follow.
This creates a culture where people aren’t afraid to take risks and share ideas.
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3 → Find Your People and Allow Them to Support You.
Don’t go it alone. Seek out a mentor, a peer group, or a coach.
Sometimes, just sharing your struggles with someone who gets it can make all the difference.
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4 → Self-Audit. Often. Honestly.
Pay attention to how your team responds. Ask yourself, “What would happen if I showed more of my human side?”
Then watch, listen, and adjust.
Key Takeaway: With an unchecked mindset vulnerability feels like a risk rather than a strength. Building your vulnerability muscle is a skill that can be developed and strengthened.
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Action Step: Journal about a time you showed vulnerability. What was the result? Who did it empower? If you missed an opportunity, reflect on how it might have changed the situation.
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? Question:? How did you learn to embrace vulnerability in your leadership?
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Struggling to integrate vulnerability into your leadership? Send me a DM at Lisa K. McDonald and let’s talk.
I help leaders unlock their unique leadership voice || Certified Executive Leadership Coach ? Talent Development Pro ? Voice Actor ? Writer ? Disney-Song Singer
3 个月Sometimes I think we get vulnerabiltiy wrong; at least conotatively. We think that vulnerability means telling every deep, dark secret, including issues happening at a leadership or company level. We can have vulnerability about mistakes and upcoming changes without sharing every detail. We really can overshare and scare people or make them uncomfrtable. Vulnerabilty - I get nervous before every pitch, sometimes even feeling like i'm going to be sick. But I know that we each have each others back and we're all ready for this. If you need help, I know what it's like and I'm here for each of you. Over-share - I ?? in the bathroom just now, you might want to give it a few minutes. There's so much pressure on this pitch, we can't mess it up. If we don't sign a new client soon, there will be layoffs coming.
Owner/President at Express Employment Professionals/Specialized Recruiting Group (SRG) of South Central IN – Indy South & Columbus IN
3 个月I think being vulnerable for me was when I started my own business almost 20 years ago. I had spent 8 years of my life climbing the ladder of a Fortune 500 company and realized how many of the 'relationships' I had made just went out the window when I left. I have spent the last 20 years trying to be the same guy in the office as I am at home. One that works hard, fails and makes mistakes but isnt afraid of having the hard conversations to help others be successful in what they are doing.
Achieve Career Growth, Make Bold Moves & Lead Confidently ?? Executive EQ, Confidence & Career Coach | Award-Winning Brand Strategist
3 个月?? I’d love to hear your story about learning to lean into vulnerability. For me, it started wtih that meeting 20+ years ago, and I remember it like it was yesterday—standing in front of my first group and letting my guard down. It wasn’t an instant, standing ovation moment. I got a lot of "Uh huh, we’ll see" looks. But what really earned their trust was in those one-on-one or small group conversations where I’d say, "What do you think is the best solution? You know this system like the back of your hand." It was that blend of vulnerability and respect that shifted the environment from hierarchy to collaboration.