pinch me, I'm HOME

3 years ago i went looking for home

i tattooed it on my arm at my lowest point

when i was at my rock bottom of bottoms

i been in every black hole he sang last night

3 years ago this week, that was certainly the blackest of mine?

there were more to follow, but that was the one where i knew

i knew in my bones, that if i made it through this

i can make it through anything

anything!

that’s some Viking level confidence right there?

but as anyone who’s on this path will validate

it’s a process

it never ends

and once you’re fully committed, there’s no getting off?

i didn’t know what i meant by the word HOME at the time, but this has been a journey of coming home

coming home to myself, home to this body,

home to this life that has been calling my name since the day I arrived

and that has been the process, of bearing witness to this entire unfolding of my life

of my finding of home

that idea of home is so much more than just a place to sleep at night

it is an idea

an idea of belonging

of acceptance, of something so much deeper than words can truly convey

it is a feeling, I know that much

and whilst this week, after 3 years, I finally get to call an address HOME

a place with 4 walls and high ceilings, a magical place that has been waiting for me to arrive

this house is only symbolic of the HOME I have finally found within me

within this life that I have created around me

home is in the people

in the invitations for Sunday dinner, and offers of man muscle to help me move in

it's in the kimchi housewarming gifts, and the dear hearts within walking distance

the gift of a Topanga license plate

i am?home. i am?home

and these faces will change, I know that they do

but this feeling remains

this feeling that I have finally found what I have been looking for after nearly 33 years

and it's so simple. in the simplest of things is where I have found the most joy

in this life. in the company of friends

in a sense of purpose and direction, and building this life

building this business that lights me on fire

making music, making money

i get to do this? I get to live this?

pinch me. I'm home.

pinch me. I'm home.?