Personal Success vs New Year's Resolutions

Its that time of year when everyone says. This is going to be my year. I'll start the journey to the best version of me on the 1st January..... A new year, a new me....Then 31st January 2022 comes round and you broke all your promises....To yourself....

I'll get rid of the dad bod and get fit.....I'll stop drinking....I'll give up smoking...I'll quit my job and find my dream job or start my own business...

Social media is a washed with easy quick fix, get fit, get rich pills & programmes to beat the band..

"if it sounds too good to be true, it is"

Every Irish Parent

This sound familiar?

"The biggest mistake we make in life is we think we have time"

Buddha

The biggest mistake people make is making resolutions based on a calendar a year. As on the 1st January I will eat healthy, stop smoking, stop drinking, go to the gym etc etc.. If anything the past 2 years have thought us is that no one can take what we have for granted and what will happen tomorrow, next week, next month...Instead of self mastery we become master master procrastinators.....

" One day vs Day One"

I remember Wayne Dyer talked about his goal was to be better than he was yesterday... I like that concept and it made me think about pragmatically and how it can be applied to our daily lives.

"habits vs resolutions"

As Denzel Washington says a dream without goals stays a dream... We can all dream of having 6 packs, eating whole foods, meditating daily, be the best partner or parent..

Key To Personal Success:

1. Clear Vision in 7 key areas (Self, Health, Work, Relationship, Parenting, Family, Friends)
2. Be clear on your Why (you want to achieve it), When (timeframe to achieve it), How (how you will achieve it. break each vision into 5 goals and who and what will take to make it happen)
3. Create The Environment For Success: Declutter your home/work environments, have your vision visible, tell others your goals to hold yourself accountable, leave out your workout gear the night before, plan your healthy meals for the week..

So if you want something different, pragmatic that will help you achieve real sustainable results in 2022 that ensures you have purpose, meaning and living your truth?

Here's my top 5 practices to achieving personal success.

1. Vision: get clear on your own personal vision in 7 key areas. Set 3-5 goals for each.

Self: The relationship you have with yourself determines your personal success. Create a growth mindset and invest in and develop you to become a better than yesterday you, parent, partner, colleague, entrepreneur. Create your own daily discipline habits/routine; start and end the day with silence, connect to the self or intuition throughout the day, keep a gratitude journal, read personal development content daily or watch or listen to audiobooks on topics such personal development, communication, relationships, parenting, leadership etc...Become a lifelong learner.

Health: Your psychology is your biology. Ensure to have balance of measure in mind, body and spirit. Take care of your thoughts when your alone and your words and behaviours when you are with others. Reduce the excess in your life in terms of measure of food and eat natural whole foods, exercise daily, work on your mind-set/perspective. Take small steps towards the bigger dreams.

Your Work: We have had the year of the "great resignation" and "great realisation" where so many people have left or changed their jobs in search of more purpose or meaning or realising the value of life balance over bank balance. We spend more time in work than you we do in any other part of our week. So ensure to do what you love and love what you do daily; living the life your soul intended doing your work vs a job. Your work will allow you to grow, live your purpose, express passion with people who share the same vision and values. You should never have to sacrifice your values in exchange for time and money. One of the biggest regrets of a survey of cancer patients was not living the life they wanted and living out their purpose.

Relationship: Most relationships end up in separation or divorce after the kids have left the family home... Let that sink in... You hear so many couples who attend counselling say my he/she use to do x,y.z... they never do x,y,z... Or so many people stay in relationships that are abusive or no longer fulfilling.. Relationships are transient and this is the biggest mistake people make. In the beginning its organic, spontaneous, no responsibilities and fun. In the book "how not to hate your husband after kids". the author talks about she ended up resenting her husband.. You have to work at it to make it work. Both partners are individuals first and always will be so its not selfish to focus on you first. Its the opposite... its the most selfless thing you can do is to focus on your development/growth. If you better human being, partner, parenting, entrepreneur, friend, family member everyone benefits. So create individually your personal vision across the 7 areas, discuss and support each other regularly to achieve each individuals own personal vision. Have weekly marriage meetings and discuss the weekly schedule of meal planning, chore equity, self time, date night, family time, parenting time and create a growth mindset together. Listen to parenting and relationship and self development topics/books and have weekly discussions about what practice to take on each week and review during your weekly relationship/marriage meeting.

Parenting: There is the parent you thought you were going to be and the parent you are. It does not have to be that way. The purpose of parenting is "soul to soul parenting". As it is for you your purpose is to live the life your soul intended. Too often kids end up following down the same unconscious autopilot lives we did. Every day connect soul to soul with your kids, and facilitate, coach, mentor them to live the life their soul intended. Research weekly how to become the parent they need you to be... Discuss & agree with your co-parent your approaches, review your parenting practices and help each other self-correct when you stray and get it wrong. Be gentle with yourself and tell your kids & apologise when you get it wrong. Spend time together monthly creating moments & experiences. How do kids spell love. T.I.M.E. Make sure its quality time and be present...

Family: When we grow our own families and careers. Life takes over and we get too busy for our own extended families. Each generation it's happening more and more. Spend time with your own parents/siblings regularly. As much as they can annoy us or trigger us. Spend time individually/collectively with your parents and siblings. Stop the small talk and have more deep conversations. Create memories, take pictures.. tell them you love them... show them you love them...

Friends: They say women have 30 friends and 10 close friends. Men have 10 friends and close friends. In an every busy culture we get up, get kids to school, go to work, make dinner, play with kids, too tired for anything else. My wife with her friends calendars the year to meet up with gals for nights out. Why do value being busy and quantity over quality. Invite your friends up with your kids for an hour, offer to babysit for each other to let each other get out. Make new friends, join social/interest groups with like minded people. Make and schedule time for friends...As if not over time the list gets smaller and smaller.

If you are interested in finding out more about how to get 31st January 2022 and reviewing this year knowing you have achieve real results, living your truth, on the path to living the life your soul intended and creating and living life intentionally by design. Contact me today to find out about 20/20 Personal Vision Workshops, Parenting Workshops, Relationship Workshops. Or you can try out my 1 to 1 life coaching sessions or relationship/parenting coaching sessions. Both in person/online options available.

Sean Bohan

086-8630321

Email: [email protected]