Perfect Love From, All Angles; Which Do you Claim?

By: Eileen T. Seefluth

“There is no fear in love; but perfect love cast out fear; because fear hath torment. He that fear is not made perfect in love.” 1 John 4:18 KJV.

A picture- perfect gift; diamonds and hot chocolate? How about fine dining and an exchange of cards? The latter more simplified and works best for most celebrating the annual Valentine’s Day.

What about those yearning for love who are not couples? A single mom. Widow. Divorced individual. All tags and titles who should never bear shame, but a sense of equalness in the body of Christ.

Love is for everyone.

It is not just a four- letter word which belongs to a specific ethnicity or group, love is a way of life.

For single women (or men) everywhere, the tender touch of skin, holding hands in prayer, a kind -

gesture, a sweet kiss on the cheek, an encouraging word is as a chocolate morsel, oh so tasty and

permeates your tastebuds and soul with uber sparkly feelings of “I am needed, I am wanted, I am an

asset, and I am loved as a person who I am created to be. I am not forgotten.”

The widow. Not in a web or locked in as shame because her/his soulmate has gone to the heavenlies,

but rather, she lives with a robust spirit, who longs for love, and is well-deserving.

The ads roll through every source of media, hinting of ideas, reminding her, of what once was. Her

Valentine memory is gone, but very much alive in heart.

She thinks about the good times, the wonderous memories, and looks ahead to what her future holds.

For some, the picture painted may be dark and dusk, needing some polishing.

Grab the oil and wax, shine on with newness. What was once “paired” and so faithfully cared and

shared, God refreshes and sets forth humble beginnings.

For the divorced. Division is never easy. Life is here and now and a time to wash away all wounds. Psalm

121:2-8 says it best. To paraphrase, God never sleeps, he catches all the debris and wipes the slate -

clean. Sometimes sounds easier said than done. Healing does take time. Love is above all wounds.

The mind need not wonder. Whether in passing at the grocery store, walking in the park, or on a

business venture, a thirst for connection and relationship is a must. Links are created for mankind, but

mankind has created “blue” links of all sorts ravishing websites hopping like bunnies from one site to

another, sometimes for a possibility of the “next purchase” or “buy me (product/service).”

Valentine’s has grown much like the hyper link previously mentioned; multiplied.

This special day is advertised mostly in a romantic vision for couples to engage; however, the wish is as

presented by the secular world.

A Poetic Set Time

The romance is set for an appointed time- The marriage covenant.

Remember, she hath no tricks up her sleeves, but for those who do, watch with a keen eye and a

discerning heart.

What can she do for her special time? Not sit lonely nor in want or litigate.

Appreciate in the wait for the perfect date.

Not as sitting at the bus station grueling for the scheduled time

Though, not a crime, it does stir a whine of some kind.

What has she been taught? What is her foundation?

Is it smooth as the grass on a summer day or butter cup and a starry-eyed pup?

I see love erupt.

From the California seaside to the Montana mountains

And glorious Southwest to on-fire Oklahoma,

The sparks of Southern states to embers in the East circling

The North cascades a far, nothing in the states is sub-par.

Wash out the trauma not only from a massage and sauna.

But with real love. A peace. A healing and restoration of capturing “beauty for ashes,” dawning her dark

eyelashes, peeling her personality to the surface, exposing the hidden and luminating a wonderous-

lovely person. A life free from coercion, beauty untold, anything but cold, so many stories to be told.

Permission packed in friendship with boundaries, growing as the season blossoms.

Now, see love unfold, layer by layer.

8 Different Types of Love

Philla- Affectionate. Without romantic love and occurs between friends or family members. Here, you

can see this would be where you could apply this type of love to your neighbor who may be the widow-

longing for love, you could very well supply with a simple gesture as carrying groceries in and a nice card.

Pragma- Enduring love. This one sounds like it takes a lot of work, but doesn’t all love take work? Maybe, maybe not.

Storge- Familiar love/Empathy. This reminds me of something comfortable. Knowing someone so well,

in comparison to the pillow you lie your head on all night long.

Eros- Romantic/Physical Attraction. Also known is a lack of self- control. Ahh, this one is for your honey.

If you do not have one right now, it is okay. You can always picture the one of your dreams, and one day,

your love with manifest.

Ludus- Playful. I must admit, some of the terms here are new to me. I guess that is where journalism -

comes to “play,” no pun intended. Except, writing is not only for play, but something I dearly love. A way

to express myself in every story, article, or message.

Mania- Obsessive. The type of love named here is critical, in that, someone is way past the boundaries -

and needs a checkup, not at the automotive store.

Philautia- Self- love. Yes, some are full of love for themselves. This type of love is ridiculous. It is good to

love yourself, yes, but not overly where you cannot see anyone else.

Agape- Selfless love/Unconditional. The grandest of them all. A pure love that says I will do anything for

you within the law. I will go to the moon and back for you. Nothing will stand in the way of this kind of

love.

How Do You Give and Receive Love?

There are five love languages you can lavish love on one another.

Mine are Words of Affirmation and Receiving Gifts. I believe I splash into Quality Time as well. But the

first two are my majors. Others are Acts of Service and Physical Touch.

Personally, I believe they are all connected like a dot-to-dot, but each one does differ and has its own -

unique language.

Let us expand on these love languages as earmarked by Dr. Gary Chapman, Ph.D. (5lovelanguages.com) and see which one is yours.

Words of Affirmation: Encouragement. Leaving one to feel tall and tidy.

Receiving Gifts: Remember, “Give and gifts shall be given unto you. A good measure, pressed down, shaken together, and running over, will be poured into your lap. For with the measure you use, it will be measured to you.” Luke 6:38 NIV

Quality Time: Like tires on your car, you want them to be around for a while. A durable love, bonding.

Acts of Service: What can I do for you? How can I help you? The Acts of Service Lover is all about what he/she can do for you.

Physical Touch: Strokes your hair, holds your hands, rubs your back and feet, cannot wait for your love touch.

Find your space, find your time, find your Valentine, a one of a kind.

Happy Valentine’s Day

Seefluth Consulting