People are blessed by friends like mirrors & shadows

It is very seldom we can say that they are blessed with friends who act like both their mirrors and shadows, because mirrors don't lie and shadows never leave you. I realized I needed friends once I actually found a good friend, and realized my self worth. For a long time, I had low self-value, I didn’t think I deserved much. I had this hole in my life, that I filled with any people I could get. But I eventually found myself increasingly miserable, pretty much all the time.

I had developed a lot of bad mental habits some of them I’m still trying to improve on even today and I thought I actually had to settle for it. I thought that since they accepted me, that I could look over everything else, even if they treated me horribly, or were homophobic, or just simply were not what I really wanted in a friend, that it’s stuff I just had to look over. I formed a lot of unhealthy attachments. When I actually found someone who cared and understood me, it completely changed my outlook on friendships. Like Franklin Vieaux says, "once you get in an amazing relationship, you’ll never want to settle for less, the same applies to friendships".

Surround yourself with people that truly have your best interest in mind, and make sure you’re okay with just yourself. You have to be willing to end friendships that break you down more than then help you. Because being alone really is better than being in bad company. For you to have a truly great friendship, both of you have to be okay on your own. The friendship has to be a choice, that both of you are willing to commit to. You can’t feel forced into because you have no one else, you can’t just get into a close friendship for the sole reason you feel lonely. '

That will likely have a disastrous result, take the time to get rid of your insecurities, take the time to become okay with yourself, then your friendships will improve as well. Then, one time I got into a really bad situation. It was at that point in life where you don’t know what to do and your mind becomes blank and paralyzed in fear, despair, lost. And when I reached for my phone, I realized with horror: I had no one to call. I had many contacts but none of them were people I was close enough to explain my situation.

I had lost hope with each scroll of familiar names that were acquainted but inaccessible. It was horrible crying alone that night in the dark, with only the light from my phone to remind me that in light or in dark, I will always be alone.When I dialed the number of someone I long lost in touch with. When she answered, she just listened quietly. You can guess how it went from there. I guess this question is meant for people who thought friendships were unnecessary in life previously, and arrogantly have taken every single well-intentioned person for granted before.

Think being independent, slightly arrogant, and nobody-got-time-for-anybody that to whom friends were a superficial alien concept. Clearly, I had all the wrong notions: friendship meant drama, meant waste of time and effort, meant hiding a part of myself to adjust to the person. Then I got a little crazy. I read books and found wonderful ideas, but had no one to share them with. I watched films and ate food, but no one to recommend them to and relate with. I started talking to myself more than I had done with people. At one point, I just recorded myself saying responses like in a call. But till I met some friends who really were there always with me like shadow and never left me in the lurch whenever I needed them.

Of course the friendships I have had over the years, a bitter sweet feeling comes over me. There have been so many instances where relationships have moved and shaped me in substantial ways and though the marks they made remain in my life, the people who have made them have long since gone. However, just because the friendships have not lasted, I don’t think they have lost their validity. Therefore, I will assume this is not the kind of friendship this question is referring to. Rather, I think this may be asking about relationships that operate under the guise of friendship while truly being something else. Imagine that! Cheers!