Peanut

not sure if I sent this out,A friend and I (Me and a friend? a friend and me? i can never figure it out..) were playing around with silly subjects...

Peanut

Peanuts, peanuts, peanuts, they were everywhere. Never in my life, if I did indeed have a life before, if these memories were real, never had I seen so many peanuts.

In places they were knee deep; wading through them was not as difficult as wading through snow? Snow? I remember snow? It's cold I know that, but I know, I know, I know nothing else, not even my name. fuck these peanuts are driving me crazy, crack crack under my feet keeping me off balance and slipping side to side like walking on marbles, wait, I've done that before, I slipped on marbles, I was a stair ya I know stairs, I was walking on a stair and I stepped on marbles, all colours, slippery shiny round bits of glass, I slipped but I didn't fall, I was already at the bottom.

My house, I was in my house, it was in the front hall and the kitchen was where she was. I remember, I remember and there were peanuts, shells on the floor and marbles and a slice of pizza, thrown on the table, oozing off the side, slipping to the floor, slipping like I am now, there getting deeper and deeper, it's taking all of my effort to just swim my way through.

Who was there in the kitchen, my wife? I remember wife! I remember wife! I was a wife, or I had a wife, she was there what eyes she has deep brown staring at me with such concern, she loved me and I her, did she kill me? Am I dead? why all these peanuts? I hate peanuts, they get in your mouth and they are dry and hard and they slip around like slipping and sliding on marbles.

Now I can't move, the peanuts are getting deeper and I can't move, I'm going to drown, I remember that I drown or maybe almost, when I was a kid my brother pushed me and I was drowning and then he saved me and I thought he had just saved me I was so scared, but no, he pushed me first, I always thought I owed him my life but maybe no, he pushed me! I was so scared of dying I forgot about it all until now, he wasn't my savior, he was killer, well almost.

But why these peanuts, they are up to my chin, I can't move and I am going to drown now like before but I lived before maybe I will live now, I'm choking, help it's getting dark...

"Hello, can you hear me bill ?"

"what?"

"oh my god I am so glad your alive! You're in the hospital, you fell, you fell into the pile of peanut shells there must have been one that got in your mouth and you swallowed it, I am so glad you are alive!"

"what?"

" don't you remember? You're allergic to peanuts, you went into shock and your brother and I thought you were just playing around. We went into the kitchen and we thought you were going to get up and come too, but you didn't, I am so glad you're alive!"

I fell, I remember after the marbles, but someone pushed me and I fell. And someone put a peanut into my mouth, but I hid it just before I fell asleep, in my cheek and the sounds, coming from the kitchen my brother and my wife, laughing and making other noises, I remember listening and listening and.. They were making love!! Now I understand, she put him up to it, my brother--he tried to kill me again!

Bret Mann 2019