Pay Yourself First - This Coach's Perspective

879 words 4 minutes ?

Years ago, the first thing I did every morning was have a cigarette and two cups of coffee.?Talk about "jump" start my day.? Then it was off to the races. ?

Years later, after I had quit smoking, my own personal journey guided me (not happily mind you), to the meditation couch (or chair),?because?I have a hard time sitting cross legged.? ?

After fits and starts, my mind darting all over the place like an engine?in overdrive,?I began to settle in.?

First five minutes, then 10, 20 and up to 30 minutes.? No phone, no email, no texts.? Just my mind and I. That was over 12 1/2 years ago. ? I

t took a while to get comfortable with myself and the narrative or even quiet my mind was capable of creating. I learned over time, that this is the region of my brain where possibilities live. ?

In addition to meditation, I now include five daily meditation readings to my routine. (Well most mornings). ?

Today, I realize my morning ritual of self-care really acts as a deposit in my own personal, spiritual and emotional gas tank. ?

This practice has shifted the neuro pathways in my brain and created a connection with myself I never thought possible and provides me the gift of connecting with others in remarkable ways. ?

THE BIG PICTURE: Morning routines aren't just about setting the tone for one day; they compound over time.

• The ROI, or "Return on Intention," grows through consistency.?Ongoing?practice nurtures self-awareness, reduces stress, and helps you stay aligned with your long-term vision.
• By prioritizing yourself first, you make space for intentionality, which can ripple into every aspect of your life—relationships, work, leadership, and even creativity.
• This practice of daily investment ensures that you are not reacting to life, but proactively shaping it from a place of centeredness and clarity.

I couldn’t sit still for two minutes when I started my practice. ?

DIGGING DEEPER: Harvard Business Review has highlighted multiple studies showing the positive impact a morning ritual can have.

• Researcher Roy Baumeister, found that willpower is a limited resource that gets depleted throughout the day. By engaging in self-care and reflective practices early in the day, when your mind is freshest, you make better decisions and manage stress more effectively throughout the day.
• Shawn Achor, wrote about how small daily habits, such as gratitude practices or meditation, can create lasting positive changes in happiness and success, and how leaders who maintain personal rituals often inspire higher levels of engagement and performance from their teams.

YOUR BEST SHOT…Your brain is often at its best in the morning (There may be some who would disagree with that)…Before you’re weighed down with the decisions, stress and fatigue that most days bring. ? You have a choice:

• Continue jumping into tasks and missing an opportunity to tap into your brain’s fresh energy and creativity, which could be better spent on strategic thinking, goal-setting, or mindfulness. OR
• Commit to FIVE minutes…get uncomfortable with a new routine and take a chance that over time your perspective might change.?

BUSY, BUSY… All of?you lead busy lives. That 9am call needs to happen or that 730am meeting is filling all the space in your head. I know, I'm no different.?

• Your internal narratives will always create a story and a reason for not doing something that might be perceived as uncomfortable, a waste of time or out of sync with your status quo.
• You have time……Think of your personal ROI like you’d think of the oxygen mask in a plane.? You’re instructed to put the mask on yourself first, before anyone else.? If you don’t take of yourself, how can you possibly be there for anyone else.

FIVE MINUTES… Ask yourself?? If I’m being brutally honest, can I find five minutes to PAY MYSELF FIRST, every morning? ? There are many ways to learn to do this:

• Mindfulness Apps – Headspace and Calm come to mind.? I love Buddhify
• Soft Music, even a bell.
• Or the big challenge…simply sit with yourself and notice what shows up for you. (My favorite and always the most uncomfortable)

…Spending just five minutes in the morning on a purposeful activity - meditation, breathing, goal-setting, or reflection—tells your brain that you are in control of your day. It helps you shift from reacting to demands to proactively setting your own intentions and focus. ? Setting the Foundation..Consistency, consistency, consistency..these short sessions, over time, create:

• A Psychological shift from being reactive to calm, focused and intentional.
• Form new neural pathways in the brain…Your internal stories will shift.
• A willingness to go beyond five minutes…that’s where the magic really happens.?

YOUR CHALLENGE: I'd like to challenge each?of you to make sure to?pay yourself first?each morning by making time for YOU before connecting with the world. ?

How you do your morning is how you do your day. If you start by lunging for your phone to check texts and emails, you'll be lunging all day long.? ?

?Texts and emails are just action item lists created for you by others. If you start on those you're 'paying others' before 'paying yourself.' ?

What I continue to learn from this daily practice is when I connect with myself before the world in front of me, my perspective and the world I inhabit shifts.? ? Pay Yourself, I promise, the ROI is worth it. ?

To Be Continued ? Ron ? ? ?

PIQue Leadership Connection: ?

I've had inquiries from leaders about the possibility of putting together a PIQue “Leadership Connection." The goal would be to share leadership challenges (particularly related to internal narratives and stories we all tell ourselves), create connection with other like-minded leaders and to participate in monthly group coaching. ?

If a “Leadership Connection” like this resonates with you, please reach out. This has the potential to be a powerful forum for all leaders. And if your curious about what leadership coaching might look like for you, this could be a great place to get curious and start your journey. ? My email…ron@pique.coach