Pay It Forward, according to Trevor

Last week, I witnessed a heartwarming act of kindness between two students, which served as a powerful reminder of an often overlooked concept: Pay it forward.

Many of us have experienced pivotal moments when someone's assistance profoundly impacted our lives, providing support we couldn't have managed without. Before he became a renowned comedian and host of The Daily Show, Trevor Noah faced significant struggles and desperately needed a CD writer. As Noah recalls in his book, Born a Crime:

People love to say, “Give a man a fish, and he’ll eat for a day. Teach a man to fish, and he’ll eat for a lifetime.” What they don’t say is, “And it would be nice if you gave him a fishing rod.” That’s the part of the analogy that’s missing. Working with Andrew (a white classmate) was the first time in my life I realized you need someone from the privileged world to come to you and say, “Okay, here’s what you need, and here’s how it works.” Talent alone would have gotten me nowhere without Andrew giving me the CD writer. People say, “Oh, that’s a handout.” No. I still have to work to profit by it. (pp 191, Born a Crime by Trevor Noah)

I don't know if Trevor paid it forward, but there is no doubt that Andrew's generosity left a mark on him.

I remember being a 20-year-old, just married, a new mom, and driving a beat-up Honda Civic on its last legs. We were barely able to keep a balance of $200 in our checking account on a good day and as little as $10 on a not-so-good day. Our little family desperately needed a better car to drive, but there were no funds for it.

At that time, we thought and felt like we had no one to turn to for help. It is hard to imagine it now, but our lives at 20 years old were like balloons swept up by a gust of wind. If I could speak to my 20-year-old self now, I'd tell her she did in fact have support and help, but just needed some guidance on how to get it. Asking for help is one of the hardest things in life.

Our savior turned out to be the mother of one of our friends. For whatever reason, we felt we could go to her and boldly ask for a loan of $4,000 in order for us to purchase a used Ford Taurus (black with red stripes). She wrote us a check and asked no questions

Stunned and grateful, we made our first major purchase as a young family - a second-hand vehicle that was slightly less broken than our Honda.

Sorted. Life can move on.

Yet, how often do we consciously pay it forward? Gratitude is a powerful emotion, but it doesn't always translate into action. That said, I still remember the kindness shown to us all those years ago.

According to Wikipedia, Pay it forward ? is an expression for describing the beneficiary of a good deed repaying the kindness to others instead of to the original benefactor.

"Pay it forward" is an expression that describes repaying a good deed to others instead of the original benefactor. The 2000 film Pay It Forward showcased the concept, with young Trevor helping three people in a significant way, inspiring them to do the same for others.

Imagine what our world would be like if we scaled kindness by acts of paying it forward?

Small pay-it-forwards also matter

Small acts of kindness are equally important. The student I mentioned earlier went out of his way to help a newcomer adjust to a new environment, a gesture that can make a world of difference. Remember what it was like to be the "new" kid on the block at school or at a new job? When we receive help in those times, we are hyper-grateful and aware.

I don't think any of us necessarily avoid paying kindness forward. Nor do we make a point of forgetting the times when someone helped us in a way that we could not do for ourselves.

Instead, we can choose to be intentional and start to notice those around us. Pay attention. When we do that, opportunities will reveal themselves, giving us the privilege to pay it forward.