The Patience Playbook

Looking into the eyes of a younger friend, I could see deep sadness the kind that comes from retrospection, from hearing the haunting echoes of one’s mistakes with every memory. She had the qualities of a great business developer but had quit a high-potential job rich with learning opportunities in a small ecosystem. Why? Impatience.

I could feel her pain because I had been there myself.

I remember when I started out as a strategist. Watching master strategists at work left me in awe their speed, depth of thought, and seamless execution were extraordinary. The panache with which they achieved incredible things was mesmerizing, and I wished I could acquire those skills through some magical shortcut. But as a pragmatist, I knew no magic wand would save me. The only path to excellence was putting in the hard work.

At first, it was all fun and exciting. The joy of learning this new skill filled me with enthusiasm. Then came the monotony and boredom. Progress felt painstakingly slow, and the idea of achieving even average performance or earning a decent salary seemed like a distant dream. It didn’t help that I compared my own 75th step to someone else’s 867th step.

I grew impatient. When would I ever be able to execute with such finesse? Was it the lack of connections, or just bad luck? Could it even be village people? These questions plagued my mind. I convinced myself that success was rigged that some secret cheat code was out of my reach. Frustrated and tired, I was ready to abandon my plan to become a great strategist and learn something else. (Thank goodness I didn’t.)

I prepared myself to inform my mentor of my decision. During our meeting, I gave a heartfelt speech filled with all the frustration and emotion I could muster because it was important to me that he understood why I was quitting. When I was done, my mentor shook his head and said, “You’re just being impatient.”

It felt like a bucket of cold water had been poured over me. Then he asked, “How long has that person on the 867th step been at it?”

That was my aha moment.

I realized that while I was putting in the work, I was unfairly comparing my month six to someone else’s year ten, someone who had been consistently improving and refining their craft. There was no way we could achieve the same results.

Entrepreneur and author Derek Sivers on the value of mastering something: "Mastery is the best goal because the rich can't buy it, the impatient can't rush it, the privileged can't inherit it, and nobody can steal it. You can only earn it through hard work. Mastery is the ultimate status." - Extract from James Clear Newsletter

The Role of Time in Growth

Time plays a crucial role in development—not passive time, but active time spent deliberately improving weaknesses, building on strengths, and honing skills. Active time unlocks powerful principles like the law of compounding and the 10,000-hour rule.

• The Law of Compounding states that small, consistent actions over time lead to exponential growth. Though often associated with finance, this principle applies equally to personal development, habits, and skills. Read more on Compounding effect
• The 10,000-Hour Rule, popularized by Malcolm Gladwell, suggests that mastery in any field requires 10,000 hours of focused, deliberate practice. This isn’t a one-size-fits-all formula; innate talent, quality of practice, and mentorship also matter.

As I looked back into my friend’s tearful eyes, I hugged her tightly and reassured her: mistakes are part of life. The key is to forgive yourself, learn from them, and move forward.

With confidence born of experience and countless mistakes I shared these lessons with her:

1. Give yourself permission to make mistakes. Every master was once an awkward beginner.
2. Keep practicing. Even when you feel unsure, unqualified, or demotivated, consistency is key.
3. Embrace the boredom. Mastery is often found in the mundane, through conscious repetition of the basics.
4. Focus on your race. Role models are great for inspiration, but your real competition is yourself aim to outdo your own records.
5. Be patient. Skill development takes time. Let time do its work, while you do yours by showing up every day.
6. Find a mentor. A good mentor can help you avoid costly mistakes and accelerate your growth.
7. Keep climbing. After mastering one skill, move on to the next. Growth lies outside your comfort zone.

I concluded with a line from the 2010 Robin Hood movie, starring Russell Crowe: “Rise and rise again, until lambs become lions.”

Keep rising through the mistakes, the discomfort, and the monotony. Mastery is the reward for those who persevere.